Attending A&E when no one to look after child after school

[worrierd]

I’ve got some on and off chest discomfort for a year or so now. Previous ECGs all ok. Awaiting CT of coronary arteries and 24hr tape to be on the safe side according to cardiologist. It’s probably menopause and stress. It’s worse today. I have literally no one to look after my 10 year old except for his 16 year old sister once she gets back from college around 3 hours after he finishes school. I’m a single parent and his dad is dead. What happens in these situations?

I’m otherwise fit and healthy with no risk factors except family history and genetic hypertension. Doctors usually say stress and menopause. I’m under a huge amount of stress and signed off sick for 2 months due to burnout. I feel ok.

Could he come and sit with you in a&e until his sister is free? Get a mum friend to drop him off and they can get a taxi back?

Take him with you. Hope all is ok .

I could take him with me but I’d need to get him early from school first which is a half hour walk away.

Have you phoned your GP or 111? I’m a bit unclear as to why you’re going to A+E. However, I would contact your older DC and tell them they need to go home to be with your 10 year old until you speak to them later.

He's 10, is he able to walk / bus home and let himself in, if you leave a key? He will be fine for a few hours until his sister gets home.

Sorry just seen this. If the school is a half hour walk away then he can get himself home. If he doesn't have a key drop one at school for him with a note.

It’s chest discomfort. They’d call it pain I suppose. I’m sure I’m fine.

Get your daughter to pick him up. Im sure she can leave earlier.

Is there an after school club at school? Fridays tend to be a quiwter day at these. Could phone and see if can get him jn and sibling can collect? Might need to get sibling to leave early

Even if you decide not to attend A&E today, you need to get a plan in place for future emergencies. Discuss it with your daughter and when you've come up with a plan talk to your son about it so everyone understands what will happen. It must be a real worry for you, but having a plan will help.

In this situation I would put a message on the class whatapp group asking for help. In our class there would be loads of offers.

Or ring your daughter and tell her to finish early and collect him.

I am really unclear as to why this needs A&E - you are already under investigation (or have been) so at most you need to call your GP and see if they will see you or what they advise knowing your history.

Yes, I really do need a plan. My daughter is 2 hours away. I’m not on the WhatsApp group. I don’t drive. He can’t walk home on his own. School don’t let them until the last half term of year 6 and he has additional needs so won’t be walking home even then.

Your 16 year old will be fine to stay with him and it’s ok to ask him to leave college early to do it.

Can you get another mum to pick him up and keep him until your daughter gets home? Or call the school and ask if he can go to after school club as an emergency and your daughter can get him from there?

But calling your doctor and asking for an emergency call back is probably best before you do anything. They can advise if you actually need A&E.

I had a similar dilemma a few years back - 10 is a bit of an odd age as they can be left for a short while but only you really know how long depending on their maturity.

Do you know your neighbours well enough to have him over there, or at least let him know they know he is alone so if he needs help to go over? Any friends of yours who could pop in to be with him? Any of his school friends who could have him for dinner?

It's these things that make being a single parent with no family a minefield to be honest!

Explain the situation to one of his friend's parents and I'm sure they'd have him. I would.

I’ve had to go to A&E in an emergency with a severe asthma attack before and my husband travels for work. My family aren’t local. If it ever happened when my kids were at school I would imagine I’d be unable to call school so I’d email the office what was happening. I have a couple of friends down as emergency contacts as well which I would recommend you consider as an action. If you ever had to go to A&E, school can keep your child for a certain period of time, then your friends can get their own kids from other schools and then go and get yours. If you literally don’t know anyone and school has no one to contact except you and you aren’t answering your phone for an extended period and they have made all efforts to get hold of you and any other contacts they hold, they will follow their uncollected child policy, which probably ends up with temporary foster care. So even if your friends or daughter would be able to say to school hey I can be there in two hours, the teacher would likely wait that long which would be better for your son in an emergency. Anyone can be run over by a bus.

School is finished soon. Can’t you go and collect them early and then take them?

I once took my DC to a and e so couldn't pick up my other DC from school. I phoned the school and they let them go to after school club until I could get a relative to pick them up.

Without being rude, if you are well to be on MN about it, youre well enough to wait until both kids are home and then still go AE if needed.

I'm not sure you need to go to A and E @worrierd

Have you got health anxiety? You're already under the cardiac team. What's the reason for your proposed visit today?

I think appealing to school mums is your only option. If I knew you I would happily have your DS if they were in school with my DC.

you have my upmost sympathy, I get heart/chest pains and it’s scary. Have you got meds? When I had an ambulance out they told me take a mini aspirin