Attending A&E when no one to look after child after school

[worrierd]

I’ve got some on and off chest discomfort for a year or so now. Previous ECGs all ok. Awaiting CT of coronary arteries and 24hr tape to be on the safe side according to cardiologist. It’s probably menopause and stress. It’s worse today. I have literally no one to look after my 10 year old except for his 16 year old sister once she gets back from college around 3 hours after he finishes school. I’m a single parent and his dad is dead. What happens in these situations?

I’m sorry you aren’t feeling great but ad it’s not an emergency just wait for everyone to get home and head in?

In the situation you describe, I think the options are (in order of easiest)

1. Spot at after school club. Teen collects
2. spot at afternoon clubs- relative collects
3. friend from school collects. Teen collects on way home
4. you get a cab and collect child on was to hospital. Teen collects him from hospital

Sorry but my mum was under a cardiologist after experiencing chest pains for a year. One day she dropped down dead while cooking dinner at 48.

Don't listen to these people saying it’s not an emergency. Unless they are a medical professional then they can not advise. Symptoms of heart attacks occur differently in woman compared to men.

Could you get a taxi to the school and make your way to A&E from there? Take your son with you until your daughter can pick him up.

They won’t turn you down at A&E. I’m a single mum and ds2 got blue lighted to hospital from the GP. I had ds1 with me. He was there around an hour until his dad came to collect him with us. Nobody said a thing.

Do you not have any local friends? I would help out a friend in this situation

Perhaps time to join the WA group? Don't isolate yourself if you need local support.

Does he have any friends you could text the mum of and ask to have him after school? Obv you'll need to ring the school to make it official. I would absolutely do this even if they weren't great pals, they can sit in front of the TV for a couple of hours or whatever.

Sounds like you need to reassure yourself the kids have someone who'd take care of them if there was something wrong with you. Appointment a guardian to them for long term security. Short term make some school mum friends and do regular playdates. Once a week is plenty with kids your son likes. When you need a helping hand you have a community. Focus on building that to support being a single parent. You will feel less stressed.

I agree with you about some of these responses.

Worsening chest pains are absolutely A&E worthy.

I'm sorry to hear about your mum.

I don’t think you need A&E x

If OP calls 111, they'll send an ambulance. Of course worsening chest pains are A&E. It could well not be anything of concern, but no one here knows that.

I would try to get seen by the GP. have you called them to see if they can fit you in? They should be able to do an ECG.

If you really think you need to be at A&E you go to school, pick him up early and then take him with you if there's no one else, that's what happens.
Best to decide on a course of action and just make the best of it so you aren't adding more anxiety to your problem.

Ring a taxi, go to the school to collect him & then taxi to A&E if you feel you need to go

I’m not sure what kind of response you are looking for here?

nothings seemingly helpful.

it’s an emergency if you need to go to A&E. You need to go to hospital via taxi, collect son on the way. Then daughter comes to hospital however which way and gets taxi home again.

you have options here

Get the issue as a sole carer no help etc parent. My kids are now of age that they’d be ok in this situation which helps but if I was admitted it would be another question. So I do get it but you have to find a solution either solo or ask for help. No help comes otherwise

Get a taxi to school, pick up your son and take him to A&E with you?

Thank you for the replies. 111 are sending me to A&E due to it being chest pain to rule out any cardiac and am just waiting for a taxi. I’ve found someone to collect Ds but it’s not as easy as some are suggesting on here. I have no friends, Ds has very few friends and doesn’t get play date invitations. additional needs make play dates tricky. I’m autistic and don’t have friends. I’ll come up with something for future reference.
and no, I don’t have health anxiety! I am anxious about my child seeing as his dad dropped dead last year. God, I love AIBU!

I'd collect him a bit early from school and take him to A&E with you.

Going forward you need a plan.

• Join the WhatsApp group. Yes they can be annoying but it's a network of parents. You need to build a network. You sound too isolated.

• Does your son have some best friends at school? Invite some friends over after school for dinner etc. You need to meet some other parents who could have your son after school for a while if needed. It's easier to ask for that kind of favour if their child has been to your house and you know them a bit already.

• If there's no suitable parents/friends find a childminder who does school pick ups and ask if she could do any ad hoc emergency pick ups if ever needed. At 10 she can look after your son without exceeding Ofsted maximum numbers.

I hope it's all OK and you feel better soon.

Phone the school and explain and they will help you sort something, even if it’s just to put him in after school club until he can be picked up by his sister.

Social services would have to step in if you were admitted and genuinely was no-one.

Glad you’ve got something sorted and getting seen.
A lot of people don’t realise how many of us have no one to ask in these situations.

Glad that you are sorted and going to be seen.

It isn’t easy on your own and the posters saying that if you are ok to be posting that you are obviously ok (and I really hope that you are) might want to update their medical training.

Good luck OP. I know exactly what it’s like. My dc are both autistic too as am I, it’s always hard to find someone to help and someone you can trust with your dc. Hopefully you won’t be hanging around for long.

I'm so sorry to hear of yours and your children's bereavement last year OP. You are in the middle of the worst of times. A year is not much time for managing the first shock and grief of such a loss.

I'm glad you are having your heart checked out at the hospital. It is best to get hospital monitoring/treatment fast with something that could be so serious!
You probably know that grief can manifest as (absolutely real) physical chest pain even when nothing else is wrong. (Heartache is not as poetic as it sounds.) I hope that this is the cause of yours and that it is nothing to add to the troubles you already have.

I would help with your children if you were near me OP - and I'm sure that I'm not the only one. People you know a little might step in - if allowed to. People can be kinder than you think.

We are all humans surviving on the surface of the earth and vulnerable to the unexpected. When things are difficult - you sometimes get to see the fellow-feeling that is out there, even for those who are not friends (yet).

Why?