Children having their own seat on a packed train.

[user1493559472]

I am on a packed train. A child who is about 3 years old is sat in their own seat and not on the parents lap, would you ask to sit down and the child sits on parents lap? People were standing.
Thank you

I often give up my seat for small children if I’m on a packed tube. It is much more dangerous for someone small to be standing and holding on that seated. I’m amazed many people hold on to the assertion that small children must give up their seats for able bodied adults.

that said, I would most likely have put my 3 year old on my lap in the OP’s situation but it depends if they would have played ball. Mine could be very wriggly and it could have caused more problems trying to hang on to them rather than have them sit quietly in a seat.

I often give up my seat for small children if I’m on a packed tube.

So many MNers say this but in 33 years of living in London and using all forms of public transport, I've never once seen an adult stand for a child.

The official line is that a 3-year-old would usually travel free, but this won't entitle them to a seat - they'd need to be moved to the parent's lap should the train get busy.

For the parent to guarantee a seat for their child, they would need to purchase a standard child ticket.

Some people on this thread really don't seem to like children.

Good grief. No wonder more and more people are deciding not to have kids if this is how people consider them.

I wonder if they’ll still be an inconvenience when those people are elderly and possibly relying on them for care.

I find lots of adults an inconvenience. Kids, not so much.

Maybe because they've paid for one and the 3-year-old hasn't?

Your choice to get on a train too though.....if we're making silly points. 😆

A ticket doesn't guarantee a seat, unless you also have a reservation. 🤪

How do you know they've not paid for a ticket though? If I'm travelling on a long train journey I know is going to be busy then I would buy a ticket and reserve seats because then they would be guaranteed to get their own seat. Just because they are under 5 doesn't mean they don't have a ticket.

How do you know. We always paid for our kids and booked seats on long journeys. People keep mentioning commuter trains. OP didn’t say that, she just said packed.

I agree with this. I would make my 13 year old give up a seat for an elderly person for sure, (have taught him to do this anyway since he was about 8 or 9 so he wouldn’t need to be asked) but 3 year olds will get squashed and knocked over on a packed train, and are much safer on a seat.

Because you’re not actually entitled to a seat? It isn’t yours, any more than any other passenger’s. That child has every right to be on the train, they are a passenger and were there first. If the train company chooses not to charge children then they are still a passenger following train policy, just like you.

Why should two passengers be inconvenienced (parent and child) just because you want a seat that you aren’t entitled to.

Did you give your seat up first?

Ok not sure what you want me to say to that but thanks for calling me a liar when you don’t know me

Are you sure the parent had a seat? If there is a free seat, I’d sit my small child on it for safety and stand next to him. I’d much rather stand than try to sit with my heavy wriggly three year old on me!

No your train ticket is for the journey not the seat. I ask people to move their bags off seats if I need to sit down, but not their children that is going too far! Going by the tuts, sighs and often pretending they didn't hear me I get when asking them to move their bags I wouldn't expect a reasonable response if I asked to move their kid. I just sit on the bags if they don't move them, amazingly they have always whisked them away before my bottom hits the seat. You can't do that with kids though, it's frowned upon.

Incidentally I always bought a ticket for my kids from babies because you can use the family railcard for a discount if you're traveling with a child of any age, including under 5's, so you can't assume they haven't paid, but paying doesn't guarantee anyone a seat, just as letting babies and under 5's travel free doesn't mean they are 3rd class and should be in the luggage rack if madame needs a seat.

If she did, who then gets the seat? You because you're the closest, or the lady who is older, or the man who has been standing 2 hours linger than you?

I lot of people are missing the point - we're not asking a 3 year old to stand up and hold onto the pole, we're saying that it would be normal when I was growing up, for that child to go onto the parent's lap.

In the mid-range years then yes, I put my child on the seat, and I stand over them, until they're old enough to be excited at the idea of standing themselves.

What is do with 3yo would depend entirely on the length of the journey. When we do Edinburgh to Birmingham we buy the 3yo a seat and I wouldn't have him say on my lap for that whole journey.

If it's a short local journey and I haven't paid for a ticket for him then I'd put him on my knee. Or put him on my seat and stand myself.

I'd not ask but if I was the parent I'd absolutely move the child to my lap.

It was also normal to smoke indoors or while pregnant, or to travel in cars without child car seats......

Sometimes you still buy a ticket especially if you need to reseve a seat - if you do it on friends and family card buying child ticket can make it cheaper travel as adult get discount - you do have to check the rules - but we have found this.

One journey we had reseved seats for 4 of us and fifth was supposed to stand or go on lap depending on how it worked out 2 adults 3 kids one under 5 - we could only get 2 of our seats crowded train and a very frail couple who also reseved couldn't get to their seats so took ours. So we put younger two on reseves seat - we got pushed futher and further away as train filled up - kid to us in tears as middle age couple and told them off for sitting in our resevered seats and made them move. We were near end of journey so not worth pushing down and having it out - but our kids weren't in the wrong - they were our reserves seats to use.

No, I wouldn't sit with my child on my lap for an able-bodied adult unless I was only travelling a short distance. It's very uncomfortable and painful when they move about, and the longer my journey the less I would be able to tolerate it. I would do it for someone elderly or disabled though.
On the contrary, when my child was small adults in seats would often offer my child their seat, but on many occasions we would just end up sitting on the floor somewhere.

There might be a reason the parent can't have the child on their lap such as an injury or illness.

When I was a child and even when my dcs were little it was expected for children to stand or move for adults, but I'm glad that is changing now.

Children are humans as well.

Not unless it's your booked seat.

Also, being practical, it's quite conceivable a 3 year old on a packed train who hasn't already been moved is going to be unhappy about it. I would probably not enjoy the consequences of their unhappiness. I'd rather stand than potentially add a whining toddler to the experience.