What would your husband say if he came home from work and you’d had a drink?

[khlolea]

I have had a glass of wine tonight after work, thought why not?
Dh is home and is furious, speaking to me like a disgrace and slamming cupboards.
I now have an uncomfortable silence which isn’t quite a silence because he’s saying he’s not giving me the silent treatment.

This. He wouldn't even mention it because if I want a drink I have a chuffing drink. I wouldn't give him a second thought when I was pouring or drinking it and vice versa.

It wouldn't register with either of us. He doesn't drink unless I make mulled wine at Christmas and I drink maybe 25 - 30 units per annum

There must be more to this, @khlolea

For me to have had a drink after work before he got home (v rare but not unheard of), he would know I’ve had a shitty day and happily join me.

I suspect there is a LOT more to this than OP is letting on.

If OP didn't have a dependence on alcohol, randomly had one glss of wine and her husbamd came home and went mad about it she would probably tell him to fuck off or be on here asking how to leave him. Not the faux wide eyed innocence of 'what would your husband say here?'

I suspect in reality OP's drinking is a big concern and husbnd is reacting to that, while she is trying to get some replies off this thread to throw back at him.

How much do you drink in a week OP? Honestly?

He'd say nothing as he knows it's only be 1and he's have 1 and we also rarely drink....but we've both lived in households with an alcoholic....me with my ex husband and him with a parent when growing up so neither of us have the desire to drink much or regularly

Wouldn’t be an issue at all, unless I was falling about drunk.
I’m guessing you’re over 18, is he a controlling prick at other times?

Has he mentioned your drinking before? Not excusing him but it does seem a strange reaction for a first offence. Unless he has talked to you about his feelings around drinking during the week before and asked you not to do it?

Very odd behaviour, unless you had said you’d be designated driver on a night out.
otherwise from that he’d probably just say is mine chilling in the fridge.
im not one for drinking after work, although saying that I have a drink when I want one, but on most occasions would be in work all day saying I can’t wait to get home and sink a voddy and then get home and say ooh I’ll have a cup of tea, but that’s just me!

He'd probably just ask to top me up later.

You must have 80% proof and extremely large wineglasses if that’s your opinion!😂
1.5 units in a small glass, and 14 units per week is the recommended amount. Check facts before spouting nonsense!

Ooh sounds a tad controlling ? Is there a bit of a back story here re him controlling other things ?

My husband would probably help himself too but neither of us drink much. However he does not have the same views on alcohol as your husband does which seems slightly extreme. Only drinking on holidays and special occasions seems a bit weird but fine for him. However he should not compel you to follow the same rules. I would ignore him. I have no issue drinking alone but rarely do. I have more of an issue with my husband telling me what I should and should not do but luckily he is not like yours.

That’s his decision. You’ve made yours. Is he often this controlling?

Have you got and are you in charge of young children until he gets home? If yes, then imo you should wait until there’s another adult around in case of emergency. However, as an adult it’s at your discretion.

Probably something like 'bad day love? I'll join you' and pour himself one. We don't drink on weekdays but if I did it would not be an issue. Furious with you is a bit much.

He would say ‘what day is it?’ meaning it’s a week day and we try not to drink in the week. We drink quite a lot so it wouldn’t be a surprise for him to see me with a drink.

Mine would be extremely shocked, but that’s because I haven’t drunk alcohol in 4 years.

Unless there’s a backstory eg that you or he are alcoholics, his reaction is extreme.

Tell him to "grow up"

You've unnerved him a bit as that was out of the ordinary.

I’m not sure my husband would even register I was having a drink unless I was visibly drunk. Honestly, if he or anyone else dared to tell me I was a disgrace for having a drink in my own home whenever I wanted to, I’d laugh in their face and then tell them to fuck off.

Mine would be fine but maybe a bit surprised as we usually wait until our son is in bed around 7/8pm before sometimes having a drink. (Not every night.)

Maybe your husband feels it's evidence of a wider issue with alcohol and that's why he's so affected by it? But even then his behaviour sounds very intimidating and not the way to handle things.

It would be a footnote.
Whats it got to do with him? Cheeky fucker.

DH doesnt really drink but he would probably say do you need a top up while im in the kitchen..

He has a strange view of alcohol. Though I suppose it’s healthier than those who overindulge. I really can’t get in his mindset but it’s obvious come from his parents.

If he told me what to do I would tell him to fuck off!

He's my husband not my mother. He has no right to tell me what I can and cant do - just like I would never tell him.