To refuse to babysit my DD’s baby if she insists on naming him Wolfie??

[Jubillude]

Posting for traffic.

My DD (26) has just had her first baby boy. Lovely healthy little thing, I’m thrilled to be a grandma at last. I was over the moon when she asked if I’d help out with childcare now and then once she’s back at work. Of course I said yes, that’s what families do.

But then today she dropped the bombshell of what she’s naming him. Are you ready for this? Wolfie. 😳

Apparently it’s something to do with a “cool influencer” she follows (don’t ask me, I barely understand Instagram). I nearly choked on my tea when she said it. I honestly thought she was joking but no, she’s deadly serious. She’s filling in the birth certificate this week.

Now I don’t want to be cruel but it just sounds absolutely ridiculous. A baby, fine, but imagine a grown man introducing himself at a job interview as Wolfie. Or me at the WI trying to tell people I’m looking after Wolfie this afternoon. I can’t even say it without laughing.

I told her straight that if she insists on calling him that, I won’t be able to babysit. I simply couldn’t keep a straight face and I honestly think it’s cruel to saddle a child with a silly name just because it’s trendy 🙄. She accused me of being dramatic and old fashioned but honestly, has the world gone mad?

So AIBU to draw a line here, or is this as daft as I think?

And before anyone says I’m controlling, I KNOW it’s her baby and her choice. But surely grandparents are allowed to have a say when it’s something that could affect the child’s future?

What do you think?

You're telling her very clearly that you only love her - and critically, your brand new baby grandchild - conditionally.

If I were you I'd count myself very lucky if she is able to move on from this and you get to have any kind of relationship with your grandson.

I would apologise immediately if that matters to you at all, and cross everything.

@Jubillude you are most unreasonable granny Jub, he's gonna be yer wee grand pup

eta; "But surely grandparents are allowed to have a say when it’s something that could affect the child’s future?" Disagree. No say, whatsoever

You can’t have a say in the naming of the baby but you can explain that he will only be a baby and small child for a short time in life and needs a name that will take him anywhere and enables him to do whatever he wishes in life. So she might wish to call him Wolfgang or give him a more traditional middle name.
O think it also depends on where you live in the country as I live in the north and people are very judgemental against unusual names both to the parents and the poor kid.
I had people comment on my DS name as a big name for a little baby, it’s a tradional name.

I think it's a f**king awful name, some people are naming kids like we used to name pets. But you can't seriously say you won't babysit him because of his ridiculous trendy name? Don't you want a relationship with him? I'd step in as and when required (though I may accidentally keep calling him Wilfie).

I‘m a grandparent and wouldn’t dream of refusing to look after one of my grandchildren because of their name. Would Wolfie be my choice? No, but there are far worse out there.

Weirdly I like it too! Maybe the next one could be Fox. 🦊

Yes this was my first thought too! I quite like it

YAB utterly ridiculous and unreasonable. Have you heard of unconditional love for your children? It's what parents are supposed to give their children.

I agree - ridiculous name. Will he at least have a decent second name?

I do wish parents would remember that a name lasts beyond the baby stage and they are naming a future adult.

Anyway OP you've said your piece. The parents will either change their mind or they won't. Please don't refuse to babysit - he needs a sensible adult in his life!

My Headmistresses husband was called Wolfie. If they were alive he'd be in his 90's or more now. I always thought it was cool.

You are being extremely unreasonable and acting like a total dick over this. You'll completely ruin your mother daughter relationship if you mention anything.

Oh no, I've just re-read your OP and realised you've already "told her straight" 😑

You are so wrong to do that and to think grandparents are allowed any say in this!

You could seriously irreparably damage your relationship with your daughter over this, and that will have obvious consequences on you spending time with her beautiful new son.

Tell them his father is German and its short for Wolfgang.

Jesus Christ. Poor bastard is going to have to apply for jobs with that name. It's a 'deed poll when you turn 18' job, that one

Wolfie

Exactly what I thought! 🤣 showing my age here!!

What a stupid name.

Poor child having to carry that through into adulthood. Thank you parents 🙄

But surely grandparents are allowed to have a say when it’s something that could affect the child’s future?

Why would you think that? Of course they don't have a say.

This is aibu. Creative/ sitcom writing is down the hall.

It’s a bloody awful name. It’s a dog’s name, not fit for a child. And how bloody depressing to name a child after a divvy nobody of an ‘influencer’. Fkin hell. She needs to give her head a wobble. I can tell you for a fact he’ll be mercilessly teased at school with a bloody awful name like that.

Torn on this one OP. Sadly you'll have to keep your mouth firmly closed and love your grandson for the wonderful boy that I'm sure he'll be. But definitely agree with you that Wolfie is a bloody ridiculous name and she's doing him no favours. Big hugs and deep breaths to you.

😂😂😂

Yes its a hideous name. Your daughter can call her child what she wants. Are you really going to sacrifice time with your grandson.

Because this is AIBU everyone will jump on you being controlling.

But if you put on the baby name thread, shall I call my child Wolfie, I doubt there'd be much support.

It's fine as a nickname but everyone deserves a proper name as well.

YANBU it’s absolutely ludicrous. It’s like people who call their kids things like ‘Junior’ or ‘Poppy’ or other names which sound adorable when they’re toddlers but as adults, they’ll be permanently embarrassed to say their own name.

Wolfgang is a perfectly normal German name, with Wolfie for short so..

Yeah, god forbid you have any opinions when they do stupid things or saddle their child with a ridiculous name. Best say nothing…