SIL still isolating due to covid risk

[dragontears]

AIBU to think this is no way to live now? She works from home and will only leave the house for essential errands with mask on. She is terrified of getting long covid. Feels like her life is very very limited for a 38 year old!

Anyone else have people they know in this position? How to support them?

I use quotation marks as I don't believe that the so name "Long COVID" is any different to any other post viral syndrome. I believe it is placed on a pedestal as it has a scary sounding name that trumps "Long Flu". I don't deny its existence but I am sceptical of its prevalence and likelihood to endure. Sorry if that triggers you.

I have no idea what Qdrops is, however, many of the scenes from Italy turned out to be clips from disaster movies, not genuine footage.

And thank you for your wishes as regards to my vascular health. Luckily I benefit from annual check ups and regular blood tests. The greatest threat to my health is isolation, depression, getting fat and too much wine. Another variety of Coronavirus that I've been jabbed for umpteen times, and actually had, well, umpteen times is way down on my list.

The DecodeME study has found ME is linked to 8 specific genes.

These genes aren’t affected by LC.

This was a massive study, the results were published about a month ago.

ME has a genetic component.

We can call it Post Covid Syndrome if you like. Doesn’t seem to be going anywhere and if anything it’s affecting more and more healthy people. I am fit (well I was), had a good immune system, healthy diet, healthy weight, no other health issues….I had two jabs and a booster. You know this protects only against severe disease? And the jabs wear off..

I’ve explained the issue with it, is the frequency people are being infected by Covid (versus the flu), the fact that it is continually circulating even in the summer and that we are not developing immunity. You do actually get quite a bit of immunity when you have flu. Therefore ‘long flu’ isn’t really as much as a problem. You can of course have issues for months after having the flu.

I do believe this is going to be a huge problem in the future and will really impact the economy if huge amounts of people are unable to work.

It doesn't trigger me, and you're not sorry.

Another thing I would note along these lines is, even if it is in fact no worse, or no less likely, than "long flu", a lot of ME and CF sufferers are, in a manner of speaking, (rather than genuinely), "glad" about Long Covid as it has drawn attention to post-viral malaise generally, a group of sufferers who have not always had the best support by society or, indeed, the medical profession.

My point, really, is that it doesn't matter if it's "no worse" that that: any post-viral can cause significant impacts - and having yet another virus thrown into the mix can only complicate and not improve the risks.

For me personally i just get on with it as I have children at an age that being cautious would simply become too complicated. But I'm not going to sugar-coat that decision by convincing myself post-viral syndrome is an easy-to-dismiss possibility.

Yes I was going to mention that - Me/CFS sufferers are pleased there’s a bit more attention and research going in to this area. But probably also a bit annoyed that they have been dismissed and ignored for years.

It’s truly debilitating.. I guess ‘post viral fatigue’ just doesn’t sound that bad. Yet you have people that can’t get out of bed for a year!

When I was diagnosed my doctor said ‘oh you athletes are the worst, you always push through when you need to rest. You should be a couch potato like me!’

Then said it could take a year to get better, nothing you can do, just rest.

A friend of mine has long covid, she worked in a care home. We were talking about long covid at work, I mentioned my poor friend, a colleague then spouted 'did she have the jabs, thats the reason she's ill, not covid' The rest of us face palmed.

I’m sorry to hear about your friend. There is actually some evidence that the vaccine can reduce risk of long covid. However, vaccine injury is real too.

Another remarkable thing about the vaccine is that people who got long covid prior to being vaccinated are often told that it’s because they…. took the vaccine.

"Long vaccine" syndrome , or post covid vaccination syndrome is also a thing. For some people their body continues making spike protein long after vaccination, with similar symptoms to long covid.

Clearly, this woman is mentally ill and it went unchecked until this irrational fear triggered it. For most, Covid is not much worse than a common cold, and it doesn't sounds like she was ever in a high risk bracket. There are many illnesses or dangers out there. I hope DB has the sense not to have children with her.

I don't think that there is anything that you can do. It's her life to waste. I would, however, make it clear that I find this irrational and exhausting and let her know that I will no longer tolerate or support it. Enabling her is not support.

Unfortunately, she has probably made herself more vulnerable to serious illness if she gets covid or other colds or flu.

While the rest of us have been living normally and exposing ourselves to covid and other viruses, we have built up natural immunity. Your sister-in-law has denied herself that protection by isolating for five years.

Covid is not the only virus that causes post-viral fatigue and her lack of immunity to all of them will have made her more vulnerable than if she was living a normal life.

Does your brother live in isolation too? If not, how does she protect herself from picking up a virus from him? Has he had covid?

Was she overly concerned about catching colds and flu before covid?

About fifty percent of the time I hear the term "enabling" it's being used as a self-righteous way of being unsupportive, intolerant or unkind.

The OPs SIL refuses to ever meet her young niece/nephew, seeing them as disease vectors. That is "intolerant and unkind", not the OP who is concerned about her obvious mental illness and about her brother who cant even meet his friends without being punished. Its controlling and abusive behaviour.

So no holidays, festivals, theatre, fetes, social gatherings, cinema ?

What about exercise ?

How does she think other people go to school, work, hospital, doctors ?

I have been round the world a few times since covir started & to all the above

Crazy !

Out of all those, I get to go to doctors and hospitals now. Occasionally I can manage a school pick up or drop off. Long covid.

OP, have you asked your SIL what she would accept in order to meet? You can then decide whether you are willing to reduce risk to her or she can decide whether she is willing to increase her risk - it may be that you are both too far apart to find something you are both comfortable with. What I wouldn’t do is downplay the impacts covid can have. I’d be very honest with her about what you are prepared/not prepared to do. If you are expecting her to act as though it’s 2019, I think you’ll be disappointed.

Me too.

l long for the rest.

Lucky you.

Lets hope LC doesn’t get you eh?

You’ll be doing none of that. Just trying to stagger from toilet to bed for a couple of years with no energy to even wash your hair.

I don’t understand the concern about the name. FFS, I can’t think of a name to describe how scary living with the actual illness is and people are worried about a name?!

Yes other viruses are associated with longer term health impacts. They will have some overlapping symptoms and some that are more distinct for that virus.

M.E. is horrific. Calling it “yuppie flu” doesn’t make it less so.

Exercise 😂😂😂
I spend 30 a day (so all spread out) standing every day. That’s the best I can manage.
I can’t even sit for long periods either (or not wo paying the price and crashing for the following 3~5 days).

Thetater, cinema? I can’t cope either with the concentration needed or the feelings brought by films. A tiny bit if suspens is a no-no.

Social gatherings? I mean you think I still have kids of friends after being housebond for years? I’m afraid they’ve all given up. ‘Running out of compassion’ etc…. It’s no fun to accommodate around a chronically ill/disabled person

Just think. I’m sure you thought bring stuck at home/lockdowns during Covid was awful. I’m pretty sure you’d say never again rigut?
Well my life is even more restricted now. That’s my life day in day out. Can you get why we’re saying this is a hell of a good reason to not want to take the risk of making your life a constant lockdown?

So sorry for everyone going through this. There really is a lack of understanding of how life limiting this can be.

Just think, even on this thread alone there are lots of us with Long Covid. It’s really not as rare as you think. Many people now know friends and family suffering.

I’m on a UK Facebook group - quite niche you would think - called ‘Long Covid for Endurance athletes’. There are thousands on there.. former perfectly fit and healthy people previously running marathons and ultra marathons. And now can’t leave the house.

No you don’t need to shut yourselves away but be aware this is a huge problem that won’t go away and can only get worse. Being fit and healthy with a good immune system is no protection. And there’s no cure. So take Covid a little bit more seriously.

This sounds truly awful and I'm so sorry to hear what you describe.

But I am sure the worst of it is the lack of compassion that comes from ignorance and dismissive attitudes. So here's a big virtual dose of compassion.💐

Does Covid in its original form even exist anymore in the general population.

I thought that viruses evolve and become less deadly in order to infect more people so Covid now is a milder version and not the exact same virus as the 2019 version.