SIL still isolating due to covid risk

[dragontears]

AIBU to think this is no way to live now? She works from home and will only leave the house for essential errands with mask on. She is terrified of getting long covid. Feels like her life is very very limited for a 38 year old!

Anyone else have people they know in this position? How to support them?

Already proven. This says more about your dillusional views and prejudice than reality.

Oh but they are. Infact so much so the government have a big attendance drive. And we know its based on sickness absence because they publish the registers.
Keep trying though ;-)

@Everanewbie Even in mild cases covid has been found to age the blood vessels by 5 years in women. Long covid is It also affects the brain
https://theconversation.com/mounting-research-shows-that-covid-19-leaves-its-mark-on-the-brain-including-significant-drops-in-iq-scores-224216
As well as various other organs
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11834749/
"Recent studies have shown that well over 50 % of people, in some reports 70 % or more, who have contracted SARS-COV-2 suffer damage to their organs"
And covid is a very new virus, much of the long term damage is still unknown. It's entirely reasonable to not want to catch it. Anyway you clearly have decided to believe whatever you feel comfortable, and that's fine, you are free to take whatever risks you choose with your own health, as long as you accept that other people have made different decisions.

You sound like a great mum, doing a brilliant job of keeping your children safe and healthy, don't let these ignorant replies get you down 💐

Thank you. I know 100% my family understand the medical science of covid and how to mitigate. Health is king. I feel sad for those who are taking such unnecessary risks with their health.

yes and if he asks for the OP's help then she is entitled to give it. But that advice should only relate to suggestions and support for him. Its why i said that competent people are free to make their own choices and experience the consequences.

The kids growing up with anxious parents forcing them to wear masks, are at risk of becoming the neurotic young adults we are increasingly seeing. With OCD, anxiety and germ phobia, unable to call people on the phone or function truly independently. But hey, at least they won’t have colds 😐 (or build immunity).

Some parents here need to be very careful about what their well-meaning over-caution and borderline Covid obsession might do to their kids in the long-term when they become adults.

It's a mental health issue and she needs to see a therapist ASAP because her behaviour is utterly ridiculous and your db needs to stop playing along .

Is it infections or people?

I couldn’t see any mention of the proportion of people that get long covid.

Someone mentioned not stopping the world for chickenpox - we do ask people not to mix with it though. We don’t ask them to mix if they feel ok, or to go to work in hospital with it or say there’s no point because there will be some transmission beforehand - we try to curb it a bit. We don’t think people who vaccinate children against chickenpox are extreme etc. We don’t say we live alongside chickenpox now, so let’s do nothing about its spread.

have you not read any of the comments? You cannot MAKE a competent adult do anything. Additionally her partner is allowed to make HIS own choices about what he does and how he behaves. I agree that neither of their lives are the one I would choose. I get really peeved when adults say another adult NEEDS to do x,y or z. How would you like it if someone said that you NEEDED to do something that you didn't choose to do?

I agree that there is a limit to how much an adult can be forced to engage with medical care if they haven't been sectioned.

However, it's now always 'kind' to look the other way when somebody is struggling with their mental health.

That's twice now that you've avoided answering whether you let them remove it to eat lunch with their peers 🤔 and also how you ensure compliance when you aren't around.

I am not sure what else people can do apart from say "I am here if you want me" and the limit to how much competent people can be forced to engage with medical care or mental health care is zero unless they are putting others at immediate risk or being violent.

Yawn...and yet you said up thread you didn't care if people wear masks.
You're just a bully and you can ask as many times as you like your silly little question - try again.

Infection

I have a friend like this. Aged 50 and still acting like it's full pandemic, only sees anyone outdoors in fresh air, only goes inside if wearing a mask so hasn't shared a meal with her family for 5 years. It's heartbreaking how limited her life is due to fear when there's no particular reason why she'd be likely to get long covid anyway.

@dragontearsHe has also changed his lifestyle, which is troubling in itself, because it feels enabling of her issue, but I can understand that he wants to keep the peace.
He is naturally an introvert (as I mentioned earlier in the thread, she is actually the more extroverted one before she developed this issue), so he doesn't go out much and also works from home. When he does go out with his mates or comes to see us, which would only happen a couple of times a month, he has to sleep in the guest room and wear a mask for 48 hours afterwards!!!!

Omfg, hell would freeze over before I agreed to live like that for a partner. What a waste of a life. Sadly, not a lot you can do other than have your brother over to stay with you more often to give him some respite.

Huh? Asking if your kids are allowed to eat and drink is bullying now? Ok 😄

I dont care if adults wear masks. I roll my eyes interally if I see someone though although obviously I'd never say anything. Forcing kids to wear them all day to the point where I have to assume you dont let them eat with their friends given your refusal to answer, is a different thing. If they are teenagers the mask probably comes off as soon as youre out of sight btw. What are you going to do when they start to rebel against your rules? Make them quarantine in their own homes like the OPs SIL?

So many stupid assumptions just to try and make yourself feel good.
Great example of the attitudes that covid cautious people face from small minded adults.
Keep going. Bully.

Just because children are marked as being off school because they are sick doesn’t mean they are always really sick. I know a lot about this, it used to be my job.

So schools are falsifying legal records?
And before we get into the 'holiday/fine' debate - its led to many sick kids being doorstepped by schools to prove they are off sick and not on holiday.

No. Parents sometimes say they are sick when they aren’t.

Im not in the UK but the chronic absentee rates where I am have increased since covid. However, its not because they are sick, its because lockdowns did a number on them and the level of school refusal is at an all time high. many kids disengaged from education altogether. Scarily, many fell off the radar completely.

I’d completely ignore her.