Do people not like me cos of my weight?

[Sozsoz]

I am 10 stone overweight
and although I have friends I’m never really included in the group stuff and I just feel like I’m no one’s favourite person, I’m liked but overlooked and left out
I don’t know if it’s because of how I look or is it the person I am? I try my best to get on with people I try and be a good friend and there for them.
this weekend iv had a downward spiral as I can see lots of people iv been friends with over the years all together and it’s just never me invited or included. I’m 44, is it too late to change the narrative

Lol

Informative and helpful to the thread

Not!

Hahah how ironic! Maybe you need to listen to your own words

I can't bear friends who constantly cancel. I don't care about weight but I can't abide flaking except for a good reason.

You are lying

I think this will be a huge part of it @Sozsoz - as I get older I have less and less patience for people who are flaky and cancel. It’s like you’re saying their time is worth less than yours.

Also I would be bored by someone ' who never did anything' as you describe yourself. What would we talk about?

I doubt it’s your weight in isolation as such, but in part that due to the impact it has on you, along with your flakiness in letting people down and being moany, using your words, and not really able to do the same things.

we have a friend who is about ten stone over weight, it’s difficult, she’s lovely but she doesn’t really want to do anything other than go out to eat and she doesn’t move very fast, if I’m honest she doesn’t really move at all, and her conversation is limited, she doesn’t work anymore really, and has a real self pitying attitude,she spends a lot of time on line really in a virtual world.

the thing is how would you like to change this, can you invite people out, get involved in more things,?

Thank you @Theuntamed .
My body is absolutely fine thank you. At 54 I have abs, my body looks pretty much the same as it did in photos when I was 17 at Glastonbury! Two adult kids later.

@VeryStressedMum honestly I do not know anyone who is obese.

Good for you. How exactly do you think this is helping the OP, given the content of her thread and what she’s struggling with? Well done, you’ve managed to not gain weight and are clearly morally superior to fat people.

I do work a lot, I can walk a lot but i am slower
I would like to lose weight but feel stuck

@BengalBangle not at all, what made you think that? I was acknowledging that it must be really hard for OP being so overweight and whilst being negative is bound to affect friendships, "stop moaning, be more positive" is much easier said than done.

@HesarealJacquelineHigh I just wonder how people put on so much weight and don't tackle it before they get to TEN STONE overweight? That's me and a half!

Why do you cancel? Perhaps I have missed it.
I have dropped all my constantly cancelling friends.

Are you going to shoehorn the fact that you weigh 7 stone in to every reply you post on this thread? Fair play to you, it’s actually quite a talent. But as I said, how exactly do you think you are helping the OP?

Did you say earlier you’ve suffered anxiety and depression?

How would it be if I asked you why? Why are you anxious? I’ve been anxious but never been diagnosed? Why did you get depressed? What is there to be depressed about?

I mean I don’t know anyone with depression or anxiety?

If you a seriel canceller maybe they just think, why bother she'll only cancel then we have to adjust our plans. I've had friends who do that and I end up not inviting them anymore, cause when you've organized something it's disheartening. I recently lost weight...3St on Mounjaro, it been life changing for me, physically and mentally...I feel so mentally light, my weight used to dominate my thoughts and I was very self conscious...now I walk with shoulders back, ready to face the world. You would probably qualify in the NHS ?

If you are genuinely curious how and why people put on weight @forthistimeonly why don’t you start your own thread? don't hijack this one.

If you’re just asking the question here to be mean to the OP when she’s upset please consider not being mean

That poster is so daft, I mean each to their own but IMO being just over 7.5 stone as an adult is not something to brag about.

And yet I typically wouldn’t actively comment negatively on someone who is 7 stone 7 - I’m only making a point here because they seem to think they’re so superior and have accomplished some kind of great achievement 😆

That poster is so daft, I mean each to their own but IMO being just over 7.5 stone as an adult is not something to brag about.

And yet I typically wouldn’t actively comment negatively on someone who is 7 stone 7 - I’m only making a point here because they seem to think they’re so superior and have accomplished some kind of great achievement 😆

I’m overweight and it’s made me very self conscious and nervous about going out, I have lost quite a few friends(thin friends and overweight friends) from cancelling plans, it’s not that they don’t like me, it’s that I’m an unreliable friend and they give up putting up with me and I kind of don’t blame them
i won’t go into the reasons why I’ve gained so much weight but it is easily done by many people, don’t beat yourself up too much.

If you’ve always been around 7 stone and don’t know anyone with weight problems, why would you have had any need to be giving out your mounjaro discount on a mounjaro thread? How were you even eligible to get your own discount code at your weight?

@Sozsoz what's your mobility like? If you have a lot of pain and breathlessness while walking, that will probably put you off, pushing you further down the obesity doom-loop of immobility, pain/discomfort and further weight-gain. If so, is there anything you can do to break the vicious circle?

For me, it was getting a rollator. As well as a significant weight problem, I have an issue with my knee that stops me from straightening my leg properly and affects my balance. My machine gets me out, enjoying the fresh air, moving around independently and into my favourite cafe, bookshop, university library and M&S. I'm much older than you - 61 - and there are loads of people my age with mobility aids, so I don't feel conspicuous. Your circuit-breaker might be WLI or swimming, or something else entirely. However, if I'd taken the plunge years ago, I might not have so much ground to make up now. Wishing you all the best.

👏👏

Well
done! We

some of these replies astound me

how did you put on the weight
how can you weigh so much
how do you be 10s overweight

how rude !!

if op was anything like me , weight creeps on over years

can be various reasons

Contentment with a new partner and meals out - break up and comfort eat - IVF or other drugs - holiday and gain 7lbs - Etx etc

its easy to gain. Harder to lose

@Sozsoz I agree with some replies that maybe as you cancel, you get cancelled. Equally as some may be dealing with their own shit, they can’t deal /dont have time for someone else’s emotional shit

maybe try some hobbies and meet new people 💐