To be surprised by the names of the “posh kids” at DDs school

[marilee]

Hi all, my DD just started primary 1. The catchment area for her new school is super mixed with all the nicest houses in the town but also 2 council areas so a real mix. We live in a council flat, I can’t say I’ve rubbed shoulders with the more middle class half of the town and I grew up in a firmly working class area so this is the first time in my life I’m properly mixing with this group (I know that’s awful but it’s just how life has been for me so far).

I don’t know why but I was expecting all the posh kids to have more extravagant names but almost every single one of them is just a very basic name (James, Harry, Anna, Clara, Emily, Emma etc.). While the names I’d normally have associated as being more “posh” are actually the names of the kids from my area (Rafferty, Arabella, Florence, Theodore).

AIBU to be shocked by this? Is this normal or a little regional quirk?

Rafferty sounds chavvy to my mind

I went to school (rough as a badgers arse school) with a Rafferty. He got expelled for starting a fire. His mum was lovely but his dad was a colossal wanker. He (Rafferty) changed his name to Liam when he was a teenager and became a goth.
Glad I got that off my chest 😂

Not fascinated no. It’s simply a way of describing inherited wealth, passed down over generations.

Presumably you're in Scotland since you mention P1. We live in a similar area - people move here to send their kids to the excellent state schools. There are also some nice new build council homes.
I feel like the class differences are less obvious in Scotland having lived in England as well - in name trends anyway.

Lots of kids here have traditional Scottish names, like Mhairi, Alastair etc regardless of their background. It's a bit of an odd thing to be surprised by.

There was an extremely long thread on this very recently. This is going the same way. Properly people call their kids very plain names apparently. Anything else is try hard middle class or deluded working class. There you go.

MN is obsessed with class distinction in a way I’ve only ever seen on here. Maybe I’m lucky not to have spent any of my life around anyone who anguished about what degree of middle class they or the people they know are.

For what it's worth, I think OP has made an interesting observation. The "posh" set are not aspirational, they've made it, they can choose solid names. The "chav" set are potentially aspirational and so they choose what seem like posh names but really are just names celebrities have used. I've met a Moses but I've not yet met an Apple. I have also met a Toffee, which I found frankly ludicrous.

That’s daft to say

You can often tell lots from a name - there religion, ethnic group, class, caste and more. This happens in the same race etc too.

I work in a school. To give you an extreme and sad example - a Muslim dad wasn’t happy that his son was sitting with another Muslim boy in class (they like each other!) . The dad said the boy was the wrong type of Muslim compared to his son . The teacher asked why? The dad said he could tell by the child’s name.

i Could go on!

It’s terrible isn’t it. You’d think poverty and the widening have/have not gap in the UK would be enough on its own, but then the English have to go and bake in a whole other level of fucked upness on top.

🤣🤣

What like Dave or Boris 🤣🤣

It’s not pigeon holing though🙄. Adults should be able tom tell
a few things based on a name such as religion or race or both. a pupil called Priya would be of hindu religion. But a pupil with cohen surname would be Jewish.

You’ve highlighted the reality of the “posh” middle classes vs the perception of them held by the poor lower classes.
That why you can always tell new money - they buy things and do things they think matches their perceived new social status, while the old money lot laugh at them behind their backs.

You’ve discovered your own prejudice. I’m always doing it 😹

Posh : solid classical names : Robert, Peter, James, Richard, Marie, Catherine, Emma. Often biblical or old royal origin.

Nature names for the new age hippies.

Made up names for the social climbers.

Aspirational destination names for the dreamers.

Local language names for people connecting with their heritage.

Double barrel and nicknames are not considered posh (I don't think).

Lighten up luv 🥴

What you call ‘basic’ names are what I’d call classic names, that don’t date.

Boris was just his nickname though. Apparently he still goes by Al to those he was close to.

No Irish person would use an Irish surname as a first name. I realise there’s a trend for using ‘craft’ surnames as first names (Hunter, Cooper etc), but it would be more like an English person calling their child Jones or Brown as a first name.

Exactly. No one cares in the world outside this bizarro island.

All old money was new money once. The unbearable snobbery of this mindset, for those who still have it.

I’m all for money not made off the back of exploiting people, held on to by the privilege of a class system which keeps mediocre people in positions of power. Which ‘old money’ often is.

The bit about the working class fsmily
is true. They gang up in parks, beer gardens, school office and holiday resorts . They do it more if they see your posh/single parent/Asian.

It’s there kids who start the issues but lie to
there big family that the other kid started it. It’s ugly to see

You’ve got to laugh a little about the idea that Arabella or Rafferty could be “posh” names.

The only ‘point’ the OP has made is that she had some preconceptions about the middle classes, though.

Think that’s a bit of a stereotype. Some of the old money lot living in big drafty mansions in the countryside that they can never afford to renovate would probably deep down be delighted to swap places with the “made good” family with the swanky £3 million pad and five car garage thirty minutes from central London. A bit of class based sneering to make yourself feel better isn’t the same as genuine laughing.

To make a serious point-I live in a grammar school
area. When I used to help out in our primary’s reception class, I could tell with pretty good accuracy which of the 4/5 year olds would be going to the grammar school without any knowledge of their attainment or aptitude. Their name was one of the key indicators.