To be surprised by the names of the “posh kids” at DDs school

[marilee]

Hi all, my DD just started primary 1. The catchment area for her new school is super mixed with all the nicest houses in the town but also 2 council areas so a real mix. We live in a council flat, I can’t say I’ve rubbed shoulders with the more middle class half of the town and I grew up in a firmly working class area so this is the first time in my life I’m properly mixing with this group (I know that’s awful but it’s just how life has been for me so far).

I don’t know why but I was expecting all the posh kids to have more extravagant names but almost every single one of them is just a very basic name (James, Harry, Anna, Clara, Emily, Emma etc.). While the names I’d normally have associated as being more “posh” are actually the names of the kids from my area (Rafferty, Arabella, Florence, Theodore).

AIBU to be shocked by this? Is this normal or a little regional quirk?

Yes but I don't think you can use those children as a barometer - if you're high up in the line of succession, there is pressure to reuse old names of former monarchs etc. Some of the minor royals' names are far more frilly - Ernest, Sienna (although of course she is half Italian), August, Eugenie.

It was always traditional for names to pass down through families (my father's family had James's back as far as I can trace 1790s and my brother is also James, maybe the 'posh' continue that trend more, but pretty irrelevant really. If you are happy with your children's names that's all that matters. (btw My family is in no way posh, the James's in the past were pretty much all miners).

The only Arabella I know is highly qualified and in a very well paid profession- don't know the family but I'd be surprised if they weren't also well off.

I know several little girls called Ruby living in a very expensive area of town - some at private, some at state school. I can't comment on the family class, but I know their houses will be worth nearly a million (in Scotland not London).

Massive range of names at local private school - 'old fashioned' names seem very popular recently (Esme, Theodore, Eugene) - but private school locally is more international than state so many kids born elsewhere or first gen immigrant (well off) parents

Posh people give their kids names that aren't going to sound silly when they are prime minister.

Yes. While the middle classes are taking their children to dance classes, we working class take them cage fighting. This is why we are instantly recognisable, even when we try to disguise our inferiority by calling our children Maude and Thomas. Our jagged scars, broken noses and huge fists give us away.

The family that live in the local stately home have a kid called Boudicca (and about 5 other kids with non-plain names).

We live in an area with lots of very ‘posh’ people and they’re certainly not all called James and Alice. There are also a lot of council houses and their kids aren’t all called Jayden either. I do agree with what PP said about the social climbers though - a lot of Ariellas, Sebastians, Clementines, Digbys in that group.

I don’t think so. I think in the previous generation ( people now in their 60s plus) posh people were arabella, tarquin etc) but since then these names have gone out of favour and the upper middle classes have gone far more established. James, Henry, Emily, Alice etc.

This is an INSANE comment.

That’s up there with the worst things I’ve ever read on Mumsnet. Real “quiet bit out loud” stuff…..

I work in a school with about 250 pupils and there are hardly any duplicated names. We are in a large city and have lots of children with parents from all over the world.

I don’t think you can predict much about a child, or their family background, from a name.

Money talks, but wealth whispers. Chavs shout.

I would say you can tell a lot about a person who pigeon holes people with certain names

I do find the social aspect of names really, really interesting. It’s hard to discuss on here though because people get very snappy and defensive.

In general though it is funny to think that Iris, Edith and Winnie would have their days again. I can’t imagine newborns called Shirley, Jean or Maureen but I know it will come!

Interesting about very posh names being the simple ones. Never thought about it. Kings of England do indeed have a very small pool of names.

I work with boys from working class backgrounds in the main. There are names I don’t hear in middle class or posher circles. Kai and Ty for instance. Lots of Codies/Kodies. Used to be all Tyler’s. Not everyone wants a MC name for their children.

😁
It's 100% deffopants true. If you offend a working class kid, they'll get their mam and dad and the whole family will wrestle you and put your bits in a bacon slicer. If you offend a posh kid, they'll say, "I say, come, that's not so dusty, what" and perhaps give you a disparaging glance through their monocle.

They're good names for cats 😁

Yes this. All the Hectors and Ophelia's etc I know are the children of people who are frantically trying to climb the social ladder

No (and yes,)

Posts like this do sort of miss the mark a bit. Are we really saying Aisha and Mohammed are going to be evangelical Christians? They aren’t, are they?

Now I agree I can’t tell whether Aisha and Mohammed are good at my subject or not, how well behaved they are, how studious, but we can still make largely correct inferences about sex, religion and sometimes yes background. That isn’t a bad thing.

I m not posh ibut do remember my grandmother telling me. " when choosing a baby name always visualise what it would look like on a business card, or what is would sound like read out in court ( whether it puts you in mind of the barrister or the accused) "

It’s not a case a posh, it’s more a case of traditional and timeless. I chose biblical names for my dc because they are 2000+ years old and thus not faddy, they also work internationally and are suitable in a professional role - fast forward the clock, one of my dc lives overseas and the other has an unusual profession which again means dealing with overseas

I mean. I don't know anything about social climbers (don't associate with that) but if you call your child either Hector or Ophelia you are looking like someone who is either quote ignorant of literature or quite happy to doom their offspring to a miserable end, with your body desecrated by Achilles or floating in a watery grave!

I think it’s disingenuous to pretend there’s no class links with names. Some names cross class lines and some don’t. I wouldn’t expect to see someone posh with the sort of “creative” names that people snark on the internet, especially not the sort that aren’t Hollywood names but incomprehensible invented spellings.

that said, there’s a level of frequency at which I would not attempt analysis. I don’t keep up enough on trends to know who is using Florence or Emma and so on.

I met an extremely aristocratic elderly man who lived in a Manor House called Gary so there are exceptions that prove the rule!

As with many things, it's all about degrees of middle-class-ness, mixed in with regional factors. I'd associate the stereotypical "posh names" with hoity-toity accents, private education etc., generally to be found in and around London. (Though plenty of them have normal names too.) Your "ordinary" middle-class families in ordinary towns who are sending their kids to state school are much less likely to go for the showy ostentatious nomenclature.