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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think people who say they cant live without there car are stupid ?

345 replies

lins1uk · 31/05/2008 00:37

havent got a car yet, my dp is taking lessons and will be getting a car when he passes but people who say they cant live without there car are surely stupid ?
havent they heard of the bus or tram etc ?
i have two kids and one on the way and i will still use public transport when we have a car!
plus i walk 25 mins to school and 25 mins back twice a day i just think people who rely on there car for everything are just plain lazy,
i agree it is nice to have a car but its not everything!
sorry if you feel diffrent but thats how i feel!

OP posts:
MuffinMclay · 31/05/2008 09:29

Nearest town 6 miles via country roads and dual carriageway (no pavement).
Doctors surgery 5.5 miles via twisty, narrow rural roads (with BMWs and white vans flying round the bends at high speed).
Nearest primary school 2.5 miles via fast country road (no pavement).
Nearest secondary school 6 miles, nearest good secondary school 10 miles.

lucyellensmum · 31/05/2008 09:30

"how do you think they went on before cars" That is like saying how do you think they went on without adequate medical care, lack of food supply.

When you go to the supermarket and pick up your oranges and mange tout, take a look at the label. You will find not only did they have to get there in a lorry (a large, fuel guzzling version of a car), they have probably been on a boat or plane.

I don't like getting slated on MN so i don't start arguments i can't back up, its stupid!!!

lucyellensmum · 31/05/2008 09:34

If the OP hadn't said that she has two children already, i would have put this thread down to half term!

wherearethekeys · 31/05/2008 09:34

Well smartypants if you can tell me how to manage my day without a car then I will do it. I have tried to think of a way but I am stupid.

dd1 and dd2 start school at 8.55. its just over 3 miles away. More than half of the journey is on a busy road with no pavement. I would be able to use a bus for about 500 yard of the journey but would have to walk the rest in front of lorries.

ds1 starts playgroup at 9.00. Its just less than a mile from school. Can't walk it in 5 mins, can't drop the girls off significantly earlier. Don't want ds to be late every day.

dd3 and I then go to work for 2 hours. Its 6ish miles from ds playgroup. 3 days a week I go to cash and carry on the way and buy things that I can barely lift out of the trolley into my car.

We leave work to pick up ds (11.30) then dd3, dh and I have luch at home. (over 3 miles)

Sometimes do activities with ds and dd3 in the sfternoon. None of them are within walking distance.

Pick up girls at 3.20. One of them has after school activity 3 eves a week. One we walk to (dd1 brownies). Others not within walking distance and no public transport available. Sometimes share lifts with others. The emphasis being on share. Can't just say 'you take my dd every week while I remain smug about not relying on my car'

At 6pm the babysitter arrives. She lives close by and walks. I leave for work. If I walked it would take over 2 hours and I wouldn't get there until after 8pm. I work until 9ish then come home and go to bed. I don't cycle in the dark (too scared due to previous accident). Would have to pay babysitter extra 2 hours. Btw job is physical and I am already exhausted from everything else without having to walk the streets at night.

Well?

Freckle · 31/05/2008 09:39

Well, I think that having a car allows you to have options that public transport doesn't, such as organising activities for children on the other side of town, or choosing a school which is some distance from home, etc. We can do this because we have a car. Having organised our lives in this way, it does then seem that we couldn't live without our cars, because we wouldn't be able to do the things we do now. However, if you don't have a car, you organise your life in accordance with what is achievable, so you would perhaps choose an after-school activity which is closer to home or a school which is a walkable/busable distance away.

Unless you live in the country where bus services are so crap, it is possible to live without a car, but it would involve a massive reorganisation of our lives, which may or may not be in our best interests.

jojosmaman · 31/05/2008 09:39

I just love the arguement "well, what did you do before cars!!?". What do you mean, say 20 or 30 years ago? Do you mean when there was a post office on every high street? When the milkman had a regular round, when the butcher, baker and fishmongers had a thriving business down the road? When children were able to get into the nearest school without a thought? When in general, at least one parent was at home to look after the home and family, no need for childcare or a nursery? Do you mean the time when there was no need for a car???!!

This is not about laziness, this is about adapting.

BouncingTurtle · 31/05/2008 09:41

I have to say Freckle, that is very well put.
Pity that the OP couldn't have phrased her objections in such a sensible fashion.

cory · 31/05/2008 09:41

I do live without a car and always have, and I do have a disabled child, and it does take me an hour to get to work on the buses. When I work, I have to emply a childminder for the school run. So a 25 minute walk to get to work wouldn't seem a very big deal.

But then we chose the place where we live so as to be within walking/busing distance to most things. Not everybody can do that. And quite a few jobs require a car; dh has to drive a council car when he's working out in the country.

Yes, it does annoy me when people who are in my situation (but without the disabled child) claim they have got to be allowed to clock up activities all over the county, because their children absolutely cannot be denied anything they want to do. My dc's have always known that activities are limited by logistics and that's not a problem. Dd is asthmatic and a reduction in traffic would be a great thing for us.

But having said this, I really would not want to deny transport for those who need it. And frankly, I feel dd may be one of them the day I am not around to push her wheelchair onto the bus.

MuffinMclay · 31/05/2008 09:42

Exactly. My village used to have 7 shops and a school. Now the only thing you can buy is horse feed. We do have a milkman though.

2shoes · 31/05/2008 12:10

what a stupid op.
tell you what op why don't you come and take my dd out. you can then push her wheelchair up and down the hills.

unknownrebelbang · 31/05/2008 12:11

I used to live within walking distance of work, and did so.

Even when we moved, I was still theoretically within walking distance of work (even though it was in the opposite direction of school).

I changed jobs (within the same organisation) so I needed my car as it was further away.

Maybe I should have stayed where I was.....except my organisation decided to relocate the office anyway and that office was moved 5 miles further away, and two buses - not feasible for the hours I work.

Maybe I should just pack in my job?

NotABanana · 31/05/2008 12:13

I didn't want to be mean about the spelling but since the OP is being rude....

unknownrebelbang · 31/05/2008 12:14

Lol, I have studiously avoided the, erm, typo.

See how generous I can be?

Or maybe I'm just stupid and lazy

detoxdiva · 31/05/2008 12:18

I work 24 miles away from my home, this would be a tad difficult without my car

I would love to use public transport more often, but until plans are in place to improve the bus network between my village and the local towns, there's not much I can do.

wannaBe · 31/05/2008 12:20

hmmm, am divided on this one.

If you live in the country/work far away from home then it is very difficult to live without a car. But I would definitely say there are some people who could live without but choose not to.

My sister for instance has two cars. Her dh needs his as he works in the next county plus works shifts so has to drive to/from work.

she however has a car because public transport is beneath her.

Her child is in a school that she has to drive to. it's not a necessity, local school is walkable and is a very good school but she chose not to put his name down there because she wants him to go to this CofE school even though she is not religious. That's a choice, not a necessity.

The busses run every 15 minutes from here so she could get a buss to work (buss stops just outside her office), but she won't use busses because, according to her, "busses are full of scummy people". . so yes, in such instances I think that she could live without her car, but chooses not to.

SheikYerbouti · 31/05/2008 12:20

Haven't you got a bridge to man lins1uk?

SheikYerbouti · 31/05/2008 12:22
PuppyDogTails · 31/05/2008 12:23

Why not? The rest of us have!

Twiglett · 31/05/2008 12:27

pops in to see if there is a 'people who can't differentiate between there and their are stupid' comment

off to look

Twiglett · 31/05/2008 12:28

hundreds

sarah293 · 31/05/2008 12:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Freckle · 31/05/2008 12:34

You forgot "they're", Twig. There's one near the beginning of the thread .

IAteRosemaryConleyForBreakfast · 31/05/2008 12:37

[jaw drops to floor]

lins1uk, try living where I was brought up. The nearest cash machine was 15 miles away. Sadly due to the fact that we didn't own several acres of land we had to rely on shops to provide food. Also, due to lack of skills, we had to rely on doctors when we were ill. Occasionally, if we were feeling adventurous, it was nice to visit family.

I'm hoping to move back there but until this useless governement subsidise helicopters for public use I'm too worried about my carbon footprint to use a car to get there.

What an idiotic post.

tiredemma · 31/05/2008 12:39

Dp drives, I dont. I have been having lessons for too long now.

He is away this weekend and we have a car just sat outside the house which would be great for DS2 and I to go out in if I could drive.

Im fed up of traipsing all around birmingham on stinky, unreliable public transport. im bored of standing around waiting for buses.

I honestly cannot wait to get in a car and just drive without having to put up with all the crap that goes with public transport.

What a bloody stupid OP.

Rosa · 31/05/2008 12:40

OK so will tell 77 yr old parents get rid of cars as they are just LAZY to walk 3 miles to village to get shopping Tescos does deliver so I suppose they can stay in. Pity really as they buy all local stuff in the village - butcher , baker, bank at post office, veges etc ( nothing like supporting the local shops but I guess that is irrelevant) Now if they want to get the bus to 1 town or to the hospital they have to walk a mile up a steep hill. Easy peasy . They can no longer go to see grandchildren or even have a day out as they have decided to live in the country oh what inconsiderate people. Oh and as for a train it is only 10 miles away and guess what they would have to change busues to get there.
I am hoping 100% that the OP is joking in which case I like the others fell for it. If you are not then get real.