Territorial dispute in swimming pool

[tamade]

I am lucky enough to have a proper lunch break and at least three times a week I go to a nearby hotel and swim a mile, sometimes 2km.

Today I was alone in the pool and started swimming in lane two (of four) which is one lane away from the side closest to the changing rooms entrance. About 30 min later a man got in and stated to swim in lane 1. Five minutes after that he changed into my lane. I caught up with him at the far end and when he turned he looked at me swimming toward him and seemed surprised (surprised I hadn't moved lanes?). He then kicked off the wall and swam beneath me and under the lane divider into lane three. Not long after I finished up and went to get changed. Before exiting I looked back and sure enough he had moved back into lane two, which I presume is "his". And based on that I believe that he was trying to claim lane 2 when he initially moved in.

He is another regular I have seen him coming as I am going although we don't usually use the pool at the same time.

I think this is knobish behaviour

PS I'm on the OP's side, by the way. Swimming underneath someone when there's a free lane is rude and unnecessary.

Power thing? Or was he making some sort of beeline for you?
Maybe not wearing his glasses and thought you were someone else.?
Who knows, but this is the sort of behaviour that can make us feel unsafe.

Gut feeling from me was likely a power thing.

this is a bit bonkers, neither of you own the lane, he probably didn't notice you as he was focusing on his own workout.

Going off topic I know, but it’s annoying isn’t it how they don’t let kids lane swim. I and my two eldest were trying to do Swimathon one year, but that version of it where you do it any time at any pool. Discovered that kids can’t lane swim unless they are club swimmers. When I said they were triathlon club members that wasn’t good enough, it had to be a swimming club 🤦‍♀️.

They let children go in lane swimming here

But sometimes I think I'm in a different world when I read about some of the swimming threads on here 😂

I feel better now someone else has summarised all the twattery on the thread, kind of cathartic. Thank you.

Here they can slip over into a lane if there’s lane swimming going on at the same time as a general swimming session and probably no one would stop them, but you can’t book lane swimming for a child. So if a session is lane swimming only, you can’t book it for a child.

This is why I tend to swim at my local, pretty scuzzy, council-run pool - it's small, incredibly basic and very much not sexy. I rarely come across aggressive, selfish male swimmers there just other middle-aged women unlike the snazzier leisure centre pools in the area.

But for preference, I'll book into a women-only session and thank god they still run those. Arrogant, bullying men in swimming pools seem to be a universal thing.

This deserves to be repeated. Excellent analysis.

It happens all the time and it's annoying, they can clearly see you and where you're swimming but they think they have the right to barge in so you'll move - nope! I regularly face people out if I was in the pool first & they try to bully me out of the way - even the attendants know what they do but they do nothing about it. I respect the people who are already swimming and fit round them, then when they get out I'll move to their spot. Some people have no manners so they need to be taught.

Nobody ever behaves like that unless they are trying to be a dick. I have been smashed into by men swimming in the same lane as me, he should have stayed the fuck away as there was plenty of room, don't know what planet some women are on they will just roll over for any wanky man no matter how rude and try to find excuses for him.

See now, while there undoubtedly are rude people of both sexes, the most irritating/annoying/rude swimmers I have met at our local pool have pretty much been a majority of females.
The three wide breaststrokers, the 'I can't see you so you have to move or I'll claw you' backstrockers, the 'I'm racing you whether you like it or not' types, the 'it's my lane, I own this lane, dirty look' types, the 'we just have to chat' types, and so on. Slightly tongue in cheek clearly, but I'm just there to swim, not be injured, not to race, not to gossip for ages etc.

No he didn’t.

She was swimming right at him.

The OP even says so.

So he ducked under and went into another lane.

No wonder half the population can’t cope with others around - their understanding is hindered at best.

Bit tangential to OP, but I used to swim long distances as a kid. I tried getting back into it in my 20s but I couldn't pick up on all the unwritten rules. "Lane ettiquette" as PP said.
I never would have twigged that passing people by swimming under them was considered an act of aggression.

I do weight training at a gym now, and love it.

Enjoy the weightlifting. 👍

There’s no dispute. You’re just making assumptions based quite possibly on ingrained beliefs about men and their behaviour.

I work at pools sounds like you shouldn't have been in that lane if your doing slow breastroke when someone is actually swimming properly. So frustrating watching people swim nana breastroke when their swimmers who want to actually swim and train as a swimmer and a coach.

He’s done nothing wrong. He got back in the lane after you got out. Is there a required waiting time for your essence to leave the pool before he can move into the now empty lane?

You will NEVER know how other minds work; you’ll drive yourself mad trying to!

What actually happened? Nothing?

Thank you to all of those who shared their opinions and experiences I have read most of them. Particularly thanks to @MissScarletInTheBallroom whose explanation of the logic of the process explains exactly why I found the situation weird and a bit uncomfortable. And thanks to the hard of understanding and projectors who think I am making a massive drama about something - I started a thread on a chat forum, my OP is not hysterical, I am fine, I even went back the next day. I don't think the situation was ever in danger of escalating, or deserving of much more than an eye roll and a tut and a moan on AIBU. There are others who have posted about worse issues on this thread.

Someone not sharing your view doesn't mean they are 'hard of understanding' @tamade.
With that final note I wish you well with your future swimming.

May I ask you a comprehension question before you go: Was I in a lane swimming pool, or swimming pool with lanes?

Many of the convoluted and extravagant explanations for his behaviour hinge entirely on one of those options. And thank you for your good wishes, likewise.

I think you have a valid point. There were only two of you in the pool with four lanes so it would make sense to use a lane each.

You're asking me what type of pool you were in?
IMHO any pool with (any) lane rope(s) in place is a pool set up for at least some lane swimming at that point in time. It may have other purposes at other points in time. No pool is solely a lane swimming pool, all pools have removable lanes, even ones which are mainly used for competition.

Yet another example!
I posted this on another thread
Sudden influx of five year olds on here who can't come up with a reasoned comeback but have internalised that getting the last word in an argument equals winning so cone out with "calm down" "it's not that serious" "relax" etc.

Weird.