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Original poster

Sister went nuts over a cup of coffee

509 replies

CrashBambiCoot · 24/08/2025 14:19

my sister visits my house around 3 times a week. Every time she comes she takes the piss out of my coffee calling it “half a cup of coffee” etc

She last visited Friday where I made her a coffee and she snapped “oh come on, fill it up for fucks sake” saying I’d only half filled the mug (I hadn’t).

This morning she turns up. I make coffee, as I was taking it into the living room she looks into the mugs and screams “half a cup of coffee”. I snap back “I don’t fill it to the top so it doesn’t get spilled! Nobody fills coffee right to the top” so she started dancing around me acting crazy shouting “ooo don’t spill it” etc before suddenly lunging at me and shouting in my face - coffee got spilt.

Now I’ve said I’m not making her coffee anymore. That’s it. Sick of the piss taking and ranting and raving. DH witnessed all this and basically joined in with her. She’s 42, DH is 50.

its not normal to fill coffee right to the top is it??? And the hysterics is certainly not normal is it?

OP posts:
kiwiane · 30/08/2025 21:59

She’s been rude and become deranged - no, I wouldn’t make her any more drinks.

heybabeyourhairsalright · 30/08/2025 22:06

Tell her to make her own coffee. What an idiot.

Whatifitallgoesright · 30/08/2025 22:18

Why are you letting this annoying person visit you three times a week? This is so excessive.

Luckylu123 · 30/08/2025 22:28

Wow looks like I’m in the minority, but my whole family would call you out if you served half a cup of coffee. We say “the tides out” if you can’t take a bit of a rubbing from your sister and husband for serving a lame drink who can you take it from? This whole problem wouldn’t have happened if you’d filled your sister cup nearly to the top the first time she asked

NoIDontWantToDoIt · 30/08/2025 22:30

Wow. Their behaviour is ridiculous. But to also answer your question, we have a saying in our family, where we call it 'low tide' if it is not filled up enough. It should be about 1cm from the top at most. Leaves enough room not to spill when moving it, but still get a decent cuppa in. So, I think you probably don't fill it enough, but their reaction was disgusting.

Ceebs85 · 30/08/2025 23:17

She literally sounds insane

321user123 · 30/08/2025 23:22

Her behaviour is unhinged but I DO fill my coffee right to the top (I obviously leave a little gap, but Yh FULL). 😅😅😅

2O25 · 31/08/2025 00:00

oops! please ignore.

Daygloboo · 31/08/2025 00:42

TomatoSandwiches · 24/08/2025 14:25

Get her a sippy cup just for your house, silly cow.

😃

Mumtobabyhavoc · 31/08/2025 00:42

I cannot believe people are defending the sister's and husband's behaviour. Disgusting and bullying.

NurtureGrow · 31/08/2025 01:24

Obviously your sister behaved unacceptably.. can I also mention.. is it possible you do this kind of thing with a lot of things? Like most of us live in a certain way, and you always do things differently (like none of it matters) and now after all these years, she lost it with you?

Obviously still not ok behaviour from her.. but something to consider.

My husband for instance makes 3/4 cups of tea, the palest white colour and not very warm. He’s not English, but it’s irrelevant that, as I’ve told him, that’s not how anyone makes tea (the colour alone is ridiculous) yet he still does it.

There are many other things. He think it’s ok to not drive in the middle of the lines on the motorway and starts creeping into other lanes. This is how WE ALL drive. At one point he was adamant you are meant to drive closer to one line 🤦‍♀️ and it took a separate conversation with his sister to convince him otherwise..

Or he ignores capital letters, normal punctuation, these are the rules of writing, in all countries.

It’s frustrating. These basic things. The way we all do things.

So maybe, just maybe, this might be why your sister became furious. As I said obviously not ok, but something to consider perhaps.

2Rebecca · 31/08/2025 05:11

I would stop inviting her. We have a couple of very large mugs so if you are anxious about spilling mugs and she wants more coffee than she’s given then part fill one of those. Her rudeness would make me disinclined to see as much of her though and your husband taking her side would piss me off

Rubix89 · 31/08/2025 06:35

Regardless of how filled the cup is, I wouldn’t act so rude and ungrateful. She should make it herself or not have one at all if she wants to behave like that.

Camaraderie · 31/08/2025 07:12

Luckylu123 · 30/08/2025 22:28

Wow looks like I’m in the minority, but my whole family would call you out if you served half a cup of coffee. We say “the tides out” if you can’t take a bit of a rubbing from your sister and husband for serving a lame drink who can you take it from? This whole problem wouldn’t have happened if you’d filled your sister cup nearly to the top the first time she asked

Or, knowing perfectly well that OP never fills the cup to the top, the sister could stop turning up demanding to be served coffee, exactly the way SHE wants it, like some deranged minor aristocrat with a twisted Gold Blend obsession.

She’s be getting a percolator shoved where the sun doesn’t shine if she behaved like that in my house. Stay at home and make your own fucking coffee, you demented cow.

TheDayWeGotMinnie · 31/08/2025 07:41

What adult actually behaves like that? 🤷🏻‍♀️

HSPme · 31/08/2025 12:33

Wow, I haven’t had a chuckle like that in ages. I remember the gold blend adverts as well, they were so sensual and sexual. I personally won’t drink instant, I’m bean to cup, me!

I wouldn’t call the sister a demented cow, I would just say she’s rude and needs to learn some manners. Now if it was tea, that would be different because British people are very particular about their tea!!

We had an American friend come over to UK and I made her tea every morning and I made it how I like it i.e. builder’s tea. She actually thought that builder’s tea was a brand. Hahaha

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 31/08/2025 12:44

NoIDontWantToDoIt · 30/08/2025 22:30

Wow. Their behaviour is ridiculous. But to also answer your question, we have a saying in our family, where we call it 'low tide' if it is not filled up enough. It should be about 1cm from the top at most. Leaves enough room not to spill when moving it, but still get a decent cuppa in. So, I think you probably don't fill it enough, but their reaction was disgusting.

Edited

When I did my nurse training in Manchester, I learned the phrase “You’d sell more if you filled them proper!” - when someone was presented with an underfilled brew. It was always meant in a gently joking way, and wasn’t ever taken amiss, as far as I recall (though it was back in the last century, so recollections may vary).

RochelleLaBelle · 31/08/2025 14:53

I like my coffee cup filled, practically to the top. I just carry it carefully. Lots of people I know leave an inch at the top, I just ask them to top it up.
No need for Hysteric's. Although if she's continually saying it was half a cup why don't you just fill it up. ?

RVNmax · 31/08/2025 16:36

Customer/Guest is king.

Very odd not to provide what they are asking.

I also happen think (as someone who doesn't event drink coffee) that coffee is one of those things that is usually served right to the brim.

If you're worried about spillage, serve it in a cup and saucer on a tray.

However, we all have our peculiarities in our own homes. Just learn to get along either way. Life's too short.

I totally understand that the constant jokes on the same topic are annoying.
As a guest, if I thought something wasn't done to my taste even after asking, I would suggest helping make it right by either helping in the kitchen or hosting myself.

2Rebecca · 31/08/2025 19:13

The thing with tea and coffee size is that cup/ mug size varies hugely. I don't think that the guest is king, particularly if you are just visiting someone and not staying for a week. If my coffee/ tea comes in a small cup or large mug I just accept it and say thank you. A 2/3 filled mug is no different to a full china cup. If I know someone serves small teas or coffees and I'm in need of a larger drink I have one before I go. Different if serving tea to builders doing manual work but in this case the hot beverage is more social convention than need.

ForLilacShaker · 31/08/2025 19:35

I wouldn't care how people served a coffee, I would be very grateful if someone offered me a cup of coffee no matter how they made it, I would be grateful for the coffee I was offered 🙂

Parentslife · 01/09/2025 05:05

CrashBambiCoot · 24/08/2025 14:19

my sister visits my house around 3 times a week. Every time she comes she takes the piss out of my coffee calling it “half a cup of coffee” etc

She last visited Friday where I made her a coffee and she snapped “oh come on, fill it up for fucks sake” saying I’d only half filled the mug (I hadn’t).

This morning she turns up. I make coffee, as I was taking it into the living room she looks into the mugs and screams “half a cup of coffee”. I snap back “I don’t fill it to the top so it doesn’t get spilled! Nobody fills coffee right to the top” so she started dancing around me acting crazy shouting “ooo don’t spill it” etc before suddenly lunging at me and shouting in my face - coffee got spilt.

Now I’ve said I’m not making her coffee anymore. That’s it. Sick of the piss taking and ranting and raving. DH witnessed all this and basically joined in with her. She’s 42, DH is 50.

its not normal to fill coffee right to the top is it??? And the hysterics is certainly not normal is it?

Ex-global coffee specialist here. 20 years in the coffee industry.
Your sister is being an absolute dick, regardless.
But the correct answer is >
The only time coffee is filled to the rim, is if it’s a coffee with milk foam on top, as in, a professionally-made coffee OR if you have the skill/machine to pull off textured milk at home. That way it has at least 1cm of air bubbles in it and won’t spill.
If it’s an everyday cup of tea or home-style coffee like instant coffee or a bag, then about 1.5cm UNDER the rim is the acceptable amount. Any higher and it will likely spill.
I’d accidentally trip and spill my coffee on said husband and dick sister too.

MischkasMum · 01/09/2025 09:14

Why are you still allowing her into your home? Sister or not, she'd have been out on her arse a long time ago. If she had a problem with "half-filled coffee mugs" she could've made it herself. Absolutely no excuse for her behaviour. As for your husband? He deserves a severe skelp in the cojones, the arsehole.

chaiselozenges · 01/09/2025 09:18

How is this thread still going on? The OP posted once and ran!

HSPme · 01/09/2025 09:47

So it’s not really about coffee is it! This is about the sister being abusive and narcissistic. People behave like that because they think they are the most important person in the world and no-one else matters. They throw their toys out the pram whenever they don’t get their way. This needs to be nipped in the bud by you having boundaries and saying, I’m sorry but I’m not putting up with this behaviour anymore. You are welcome in my home but only if you can behave respectfully and politely.