AIBU to invade England and claim the throne?

[GuillameDucdeNormandie]

I’ve been a lurker for a while and hoping I can benefit from your wise advice.

I’ve been Duke of Normandy for a while now but like any early medieval noble, I’m keen to progress. I’ve had my eye on the English crown for while now. I’m distantly related to Edward the Confessor and he’s got no heir, so it seemed like a perfect fit, yeah?

Anyway, I dropped lucky 10 or so years ago when Edward agreed to back me as his heir. His brother in law, Harold, also swore allegiance to my claim.

Roll forward and Edward has just died; imagine my shock to hear Harold has claimed the throne, the duplicitous shit!

So, in these circumstances, AIBU to launch a full scale invasion of England? Or should I just suck it up?

Tricky, maybe just get the Pope's blessing to make sure the big guys on your side and then go for it. You could be a king not just a duke. Hers hoping for good weather on your Channel crossing

YANBU Give it a go . What do you have to lose? Of course you may have to go NC with Harold afterwards if either of you survive. Also I would start looking up embroiderers as you may want a record of the event.

YABU for saying "yeah" Surely if you emerge triumphant you would wish to add to our language not diminish it.

I would like to see a BBC TV drama about this. If only there was one about to be broadcast.

Anyone else looking to cause trouble? I reckon Harold needs to watch his brother? Tostig is a bit of an arse between you and me but he could be useful, and help cause a distraction?

It's all about divide n conquer, innit?

I don't think that "swearing allegiance" counts when you tricked Harold. He's been approved by the Witan, the only way you're going to get that throne is if you launch an invasion.

Sounds like Harold needs to look out.

I love this thread!

Just make sure you ask to see samples of the embroiderers’ work first. Wouldn’t want to end up with some smutty minded oiks who put nudey pics round the borders.

<Stares at comet>

Listen, I know it's early days, but could you make sure the site of your final battle is actually Battle? As there's some dispute and we locals get a bit peeved.

Also, can you get your kids to keep it in their pants? We can avoid the whole War of the Roses too that way.

Once you get settled in England you should audit the place. Call it something like the Domesday Book.

I think this post is incredibly poor taste. Asking the opinion of the people you intend to invade. How very dare you. And don’t you be coming over here bringing your fancy castles and fancy pants language either.

YADNBU. Far better to crack on and give it a shot (with an arrow) than to loiter about in Normandy.

Maybe bring the DC and make it a family outing? I hear Hastings is nice and you could check out Winchester after?

Yes, pls leave a note like "will woz 'ere" or something on the battlefield, maybe pinned by an arrow so that we know for future reference? Its something us locals do get a lot of questions about.

Also do ensure that your lasting legacy is that every business within a 30 mile radius of Hastings manages to squeeze your name / the year / the Battle in somehow. William the Concreter anyone?

Don't you think how you conned Harald into swearing on the bones of French saints was a tad duplicitous yourself?

If I were you I would do something about that hair style.

Its deeply unfashionable.

FYI.

This sounds really exciting and I feel like we should record your campaign for posterity. I’m new to needlework but I’ve got a few ideas…

Don't be fooled by the literacy of the clergy and that fantastic gold-and-garnet jewellery; England is a unfashionable dump and becoming king of the place is not going to impress anyone. Try your luck with the French throne instead: better wine, better food, better climate.

If you’re successful I’ll embroider a tapestry about it for you. I’m in need of a new sewing project now the nights are drawing in.

Ah I see Merryoldgoat got there first! Well we could make it an extra long one if there are a few of us working on it!

Applying for first trebuchet launcher position!

I realize I'm a bit early, but I'm really looking forward to flinging things about.

Aye, fillez-vous les boots 😀

I'd be more included to become Pope. You'd get much better stuff.

I hear Harold has gone on a long distance hike up north somewhere, Stamford Bridge I believe. So now might be a good time to nip over the channel.