Page 4 | To be slightly loving hearing my kids misbehave?

Houghers · 2025-08-21T13:42:04+00:00

I’m a SAHM. Dh appreciates what I do in the home but every now I will get an annoying comment like “well I’m the one getting up at 3 am tomorrow” (dh is a pilot). These comments are rare but they can sting when I perceive them to mean DH’s role/routine is of more importance than mine. Anyway, dh has today off. He has said I can have the day to myself. I spent the morning out with my sister and am now in my robe ready to get in the bath and just deep condition EVERYTHING ahead of a meal out with friends. Our bedroom has a Juliet balcony. I can hear the kids being absolute terrors for dh in the garden. They are normally quite easy going but it’s one of those days. And the dog is randomly being a bit of a handful as well. I can hear dh is stressed in his voice. He went out to the garden with his laptop and a coffee and neither have been touched. He just asked my son “what’s going on with you today, mate?” 😂 Im in bed. Secretly loving the kids giving him a hard time Two of the kids go to school/nursery (part time for one). But I always love when he gets an insight into what my life looks like.

researchers3 · 22/08/2025 00:38

Coconutter24 · 21/08/2025 15:19

I voted YABU, your DH has a job which must be quite stressful at times because of how much pressure there is to safely get people about plus he obviously works long hours and early starts. Yet he’s got a day off and said he’ll watch the kids so you can also have a day off to do whatever you want but you’re hear gloating that he’s sounding stressed and the kids are misbehaving.

She's not gloating, get a grip! It's just edifying that her DH has a glimmer into her life, looking after their DC, most of the time.

Hungrybrood · 22/08/2025 01:22

Hungrysalmon87 · 21/08/2025 20:59

Well hopefully your husband leaves you sooner rather than later, and finds a proper teammate. The kids aren't even home full-time, so you're a part-time sahm at best. Hope that you've got a prenup, for your sake.

Come on!

Hungrybrood · 22/08/2025 01:22

Hungrysalmon87 · 21/08/2025 20:59

Well hopefully your husband leaves you sooner rather than later, and finds a proper teammate. The kids aren't even home full-time, so you're a part-time sahm at best. Hope that you've got a prenup, for your sake.

This reeks of jealousy and bitterness.

Doone22 · 22/08/2025 06:37

Coconutter24 · 21/08/2025 15:19

I voted YABU, your DH has a job which must be quite stressful at times because of how much pressure there is to safely get people about plus he obviously works long hours and early starts. Yet he’s got a day off and said he’ll watch the kids so you can also have a day off to do whatever you want but you’re hear gloating that he’s sounding stressed and the kids are misbehaving.

Tbh it makes you seem like a spiteful bitch. His job is likely difficult hours and quite high pressured and being a SAHM is quite a privilege: only the rich or the very poor can afford that. I would be pretty damn happy my husband offered to have kids for the whole day without being asked and refusing to bother you even if he's struggling with it.
If you don't like being a SAHM and all the terrible effort it is for you then get a job and send them to nursery. You sound like you have a lovely easy life.

sandwichlover93 · 22/08/2025 06:40

Coconutter24 · 21/08/2025 15:19

I voted YABU, your DH has a job which must be quite stressful at times because of how much pressure there is to safely get people about plus he obviously works long hours and early starts. Yet he’s got a day off and said he’ll watch the kids so you can also have a day off to do whatever you want but you’re hear gloating that he’s sounding stressed and the kids are misbehaving.

OP I think you’re husband is secretly on MN.

Seriously though, what bullshit. OP has to permanently keep the kids safe and probably does everything on her own at home. Why are men’s jobs always portrayed as “more important” and when they get home they should be waited on and not bothered by THEIR OWN kids. Fuck that.

Coconutter24 · 22/08/2025 07:03

researchers3 · 22/08/2025 00:38

She's not gloating, get a grip! It's just edifying that her DH has a glimmer into her life, looking after their DC, most of the time.

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I’m sure he knows what looking after his children is like.

Coconutter24 · 22/08/2025 07:09

sandwichlover93 · 22/08/2025 06:40

OP I think you’re husband is secretly on MN.

Seriously though, what bullshit. OP has to permanently keep the kids safe and probably does everything on her own at home. Why are men’s jobs always portrayed as “more important” and when they get home they should be waited on and not bothered by THEIR OWN kids. Fuck that.

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Who said his job is more important? He does work and gets up at 3am yet on this day off he tells OP to go do what she wants for the day, I’m failing to understand how people aren’t seeing he’s being thoughtful/kind and OP is gloating he’s struggling. He could quite easily of spent the day relaxing himself while OP looks after the kids but instead he’s looking after them to give op a break. No one has also said dads shouldn’t be bothered by their own kids 🤷‍♀️
Im sure if ops DH was on here he’d be very disappointed with her post!!

LittleBearPad · 22/08/2025 08:43

Coconutter24 · 22/08/2025 07:09

Who said his job is more important? He does work and gets up at 3am yet on this day off he tells OP to go do what she wants for the day, I’m failing to understand how people aren’t seeing he’s being thoughtful/kind and OP is gloating he’s struggling. He could quite easily of spent the day relaxing himself while OP looks after the kids but instead he’s looking after them to give op a break. No one has also said dads shouldn’t be bothered by their own kids 🤷‍♀️
Im sure if ops DH was on here he’d be very disappointed with her post!!

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Oh get a grip.

He won’t be getting up at 3am everyday.
When he’s flying long haul he’ll be in nice hotels relaxing before coming back.

Irs a very responsible job but it’s not that terrifying!

LittleBearPad · 22/08/2025 08:45

And no one’s said it’s not great that he’s told OP to take the day for herself. She doesn’t have to prostrate herself in gratitude though!

In similar circumstances my DH would smile wryly and bring me a G&T

YippyKiYay · 22/08/2025 08:48

Hope you have a lovely relax OP! I'm lucky to have sahd as a partner and it means I can get on with my (important lol) job without stressing about school pickups and extracurriculars. He also does all the washing, groceries during the week, I do the weekends and we share the cooking.
I would never dream of saying he's got it easy, have even tried to coax him back into part-time work for his sanity. They are teenagers so at least the nights are ok. It's a tough gig keeping little humans alive and maintaining your own sense of self.
Enjoy 🥂

fandjango · 22/08/2025 08:53

accidentally clicked you are being unreasonable sorry about that. i’m in agreement with you!

CyanDreamer · 22/08/2025 08:54

sandwichlover93 · 22/08/2025 06:40

OP I think you’re husband is secretly on MN.

Seriously though, what bullshit. OP has to permanently keep the kids safe and probably does everything on her own at home. Why are men’s jobs always portrayed as “more important” and when they get home they should be waited on and not bothered by THEIR OWN kids. Fuck that.

Show quote history

who said that? You are not reading the thread, you're projecting.

The working parent is also keeping the kids safe, providing them with you know.. a roof, food.

The difference is that the husband just looks after his own kids, but it's the OP laughing at him when they're being difficult. I miss the bit where the husband laughs at the OP when the kids are difficult with her? Where was that?

Newmum288 · 22/08/2025 08:57

Not unreasonable at all!!! It’s perfectly normal to ‘enjoy’ your other half experiencing what you experience plenty of times, and gaining an appreciation of the work that you do!
(Dare I say, I even enjoyed it a bit too reading this post 🤣 very cathartic lol)

materialgworl · 22/08/2025 09:00

this would’ve gone differently had you not mentioned pilot 🫣

rwalker · 22/08/2025 09:05

Just sounds a bit spiteful
like anything else when you do it all the time you have your routines and when someone randomly does the same thing there finding there feet

doesn’t matter what job you do 3am get ups are horrendous

Zippidydoodah · 22/08/2025 09:57

materialgworl · 22/08/2025 09:00

this would’ve gone differently had you not mentioned pilot 🫣

Substitute “pilot” for “any high pressure/responsibility job that requires you to wake up at 3”.

GiantTeddyIsTired · 22/08/2025 10:05

CyanDreamer · 22/08/2025 08:54

who said that? You are not reading the thread, you're projecting.

The working parent is also keeping the kids safe, providing them with you know.. a roof, food.

The difference is that the husband just looks after his own kids, but it's the OP laughing at him when they're being difficult. I miss the bit where the husband laughs at the OP when the kids are difficult with her? Where was that?

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I think the point is that OP's husband probably doesn't think at all about when the kids are being difficult for her, because she just handles it.

I imagine being a SAHM around a pilot is quite challenging TBH - and that holding down a job herself around it would be difficult (finding a job that would let her work around his shifts for example)

BilbaoBaggage · 22/08/2025 10:31

JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff · 21/08/2025 20:26

Honestly, MN is so po-faced these days.

Time was, you could post a little moan about parenting or your husband, and you'd get back witchy cackles and offers of virtual gin.

Now it's so weirdly earnest.

Also there is no indication the husband thinks OP has an easy job. He just moaned about 3am starts. Well they're hard and he's human! I used to get up at 430 for work and that was bad enough.

This sums it up accurately. Where did all the humour go?
Millennial parenting is far too serious.

MagpiePi · 22/08/2025 10:37

Coconutter24 · 21/08/2025 15:19

I voted YABU, your DH has a job which must be quite stressful at times because of how much pressure there is to safely get people about plus he obviously works long hours and early starts. Yet he’s got a day off and said he’ll watch the kids so you can also have a day off to do whatever you want but you’re hear gloating that he’s sounding stressed and the kids are misbehaving.

…said he’ll ’watch the kids’ ?!!
You think he’s doing the OP a massive favour for parenting his own children? 🙄

MagpiePi · 22/08/2025 10:40

Zippidydoodah · 22/08/2025 09:57

Substitute “pilot” for “any high pressure/responsibility job that requires you to wake up at 3”.

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I used to have one baby waking up at about 3am and being quite happy gurgling and just being awake, but obviously I couldn’t sleep. He’d go back to sleep about 5, and then the slightly older child would be awake at 5:30 ready to face the day!
Gosh, that was fun, and I wasn’t even expecting to be paid a huge pilot’s salary and get days off!

lotsofpatience · 22/08/2025 10:48

Why on earth do relish on your children behaving like brats? You better nip in that bud before it comes to bite your arse, darling. You sound naive

Catsandcannedbeans · 22/08/2025 10:59

I get it. Today is DHs turn to get up with the kids and I overheard DD saying “DADDY I HATE THAT SPOON NO NO NO” and was a little smug. Amateur - she obviously needs the green spoon for porridge. Rookie move on his part.

Zippidydoodah · 22/08/2025 11:02

MagpiePi · 22/08/2025 10:40

I used to have one baby waking up at about 3am and being quite happy gurgling and just being awake, but obviously I couldn’t sleep. He’d go back to sleep about 5, and then the slightly older child would be awake at 5:30 ready to face the day!
Gosh, that was fun, and I wasn’t even expecting to be paid a huge pilot’s salary and get days off!

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Oh, come on. It’s not the same!

Coconutter24 · 22/08/2025 11:38

MagpiePi · 22/08/2025 10:37

…said he’ll ’watch the kids’ ?!!
You think he’s doing the OP a massive favour for parenting his own children? 🙄

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No it’s not a massive favour but it’s a nice thing to suggest to do. He could he at home with OP whilst she still does the bulk of her job (sahm) and do what he pleases with his day off but he’s suggested she has a nice day to herself.

GasPanic · 22/08/2025 11:50

Doesn't sound much like a team effort relationship if you are gloating over each others difficulties.

You're supposed to be supporting each other, not getting off on the idea that your partner might be finding the world difficult.