To ask for tips in not feeling down as we approach autumn?

[Rougeblush]

Perhaps I should post in Mental Health but I think a lot of people feel like this to a lesser or greater extent!

Every year as we head towards the end of summer I start feeling a sense of dread. While I’m happy to get back into a routine of DC at school and work not being interrupted by holidays etc, I always start feeling low around this time with the days getting shorter already.

It seems to be worsening as I age, and this year not helped by the fact my eldest DC is off to university - while I’m thrilled for this next stage for him, I’ll miss him so much.

Would love to hear advice on what people do to minimise the autumn sadness! I know loads of people love September, but I’m not one of them 😂

I share your feelings. For me, once I get to September I'm just waiting for next March and that feeling gets worse every year. I wish I had tips other than gritting your teeth and realising that the next few months will pass.

I was actually thinking the same thing today, sad summer is also over and the cold dark nights are coming. My plan is buy some nice new throws/candles/lights so my house is cozy. Get outside a lot all through winter ( easy for me as I have 2 nursery age children) bust out my camel coat and red lipstick. We usually do a September holiday (just a uk caravan this year) so there is something to look forward to. Embrace your inner Pinterest basic bitch!

I feel the same. October, November and December are so difficult for me. I hate the spiders, the feeling of things winding down, the dark nights and the intensity of the run-up to Christmas. I want to back out of doing Christmas, and run off to Spain for a few months, but that’s not realistic. I have no advice. Light box, medication, cosy clothes; I do all of that already but I still really struggle with it all.

I used to hate summer. So I thought about all the aspects I hated about it and put in place things to mitigate that. As an example, I hate light evenings so I now have a combination of blackout blinds/curtains, so I can make it dark when I want to. I also tried to really focus on the little things I did like, like being able to eat outside and tried to fully appreciate them.

I think it is possible to change your mindset but it takes some work. Really think about what it is you don't like about Autumn, what can you do to lessen that impact? What little things can you do, that you do enjoy. I now have things I look forward to in every season.

I'm not interested in cosy and all that stuff and I don't like Christmas either. I've got a holiday booked for the end of March and I'll be counting down the days.

Thanks all! Some really great advice here - keep it coming!

Sign up for an evening or weekend course that will take you through the autumn/winter. Pottery, art, craft, Pilates, and so on.

I do go to Aqua Aerobics several times a week and will certainly keep it up in the winter. It always lifts my spirits.

Remember that by September 21st we will be halfway through the 'days getting shorter' phase.

My now late MIL used to be like this from about July to March..

Try not to wish your life away. It's nice to have a holiday planned, but counting down is not ideal.

Watch less news - that's what I am doing currently..
Set a budget for Christmas now, and tell relatives / kids etc. Wind Christmas in, and reduce pressure.

Our only DC goes off to Uni in 5 weeks. I'm really excited for her, but not sure how I will be feeling. Changed jobs this year, not through choice, and am finding work very dull. Pleasant though, so must be grateful.

A school friend died last year (at 52) so I really make an effort to see the positives.

We go to the pub every Sunday - but drink non alcoholic. Feels like a real life community thing now.

I love the autumn and winter time.

I feel the dread too, a real visceral sickening fear.

It is an endurance game. Putting a lot of lamps in my living room helped, I don't cope with dim dreary cold evenings. Electric blanket helped as I don't cope with cold. Saving up some AL days to use in the winter months just to have randomly shorter weeks, I often work in a windowless room and long shifts, so I can go half a week without really seeing sunlight otherwise.

Humans have always celebrated midwinter because they're halfway to surviving winter again. Solstice is more important to me than Christmas for that reason.

I haven't cracked it yet to be honest. It's really hard.

Thanks so much and solidarity to those who feel similar!

I definitely need to keep up the exercise - have put on weight this year and have a bit of a pattern of only starting to ramp up exercise in spring. It does help my mood, as does getting out for walks etc - I spent too much time inside last year! I also want to cut down on my drinking as I often over-do it and it makes me feel shit.

@topcat2014 - so sorry about your friend ❤️ I’ve also lost a few people now too, and have one friend facing a terminal diagnosis sadly - so I also try to stay grateful for being here! It’s just hard to keep in mind all the time though, I just feel my mood plummeting along with the light and temperatures, and really struggle with this.

I feel the same and am gratified to see the poll currently backing us up!

I basically use the winter to prepare so I can enjoy spring, summer and (to a much lesser extent) autumn. Do all the boring chores and house stuff. Go to the gym. Eat well. Focus on beauty and using retinol while there's no light.

It does help me a little to watch TV programmes or films set somewhere sunny, and to take the occasional spa day with sauna and jacuzzi so that I get some warmth. Photos from summer days also bring comfort.

Given the age of your DC, would a January holiday to the sun be feasible? That was my go to before becoming a parent.

@Wheech - would love some winter sun, but are massively strained financially at the moment 😂 can’t see it happening this year!

I feel your pain, I am exactly the same and also my eldest going to uni and I will miss her so much I am dreading it (though so happy for her at the same time) I am planning to go and visit her half way through the term as something to look forward to, and also doing some redecorating. I’d love winter sun too but uni isn’t cheap so no sunny holidays on the horizon, sadly.
I absolutely hate winter - grey, miserable, cold, depressing. As soon as both ours are through uni and we have money again I will go on holiday all winter but til then just keep planning summer things and ride the storm, so so speak.
good luck and solidarity!

I was brought up never to do indoor things in the summer, so I do look forward to seeing movies etc with (less) guilt.

But I know what you mean. I used not to mind the winter but as I get older I’m struggling more. I agree with saving a few days or even hours of leave to get a bit of light at some point.

I'm sure that's really helpful to the OP. 🙄

Totally get this. I’ve had it since childhood but it got really bad during uni when I would dread going back in Sept/oct after a summer of freedom, happy summer jobs, lots of socialising. I get it now with the turn of the school year. The worst years are when the kids are moving up from preschool to primary or primary to secondary! I think I’ve probably always struggled with transitions generally and think the gradual shortening of the days really affects me - getting less light. Weirdly once the clocks change I’m ok again. So it doesn’t last all winter. I get a huge sense of loss and feel quite bereft in September though.

Things I have put in place this year:

some lovely weekend plans with friends in October to count down to

signed up to two weekly exercise classes

Trying to plan next years holidays early although no one else in the family is any help with that as they all keep changing their plans/jobs so no idea when we can actually book!

I feel the opposite. Can't wait for autumn and winter so I can get the curtains shut earlier and earlier....cosy.

But many of us feel that way.

In which case there are threads to express that. The OP was asking for advice from people who didn't like autumn and winter on how to reduce the impact.

Yes, lovely for you. It's not what the OP asked.

I think the OP is looking for practical tips, not to be told that not everyone minds Autumn/Winter.

I feel this gets worse for me every year. It's the dark more than the cold, a sunny day in January is very uplifting.

I think it's important to get outdoors every day. This is easier for me now I'm retired. When I was at work I felt nocturnal going in the dark and coming home in the dark.

A day at the coast once a month.

A holiday in January in the sun is more important to me than a summer holiday, even though it may not be hot. We usually go to the canaries.

I was brought up never to do indoor things in the summer, so I do look forward to seeing movies etc with (less) guilt.

I like this idea, although the hot weather recently has driven me indoors.