To be embarrassed by DH in shop?

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NC’d just in case

DH and I popped into the only decent shop in our town this morning. I had asked him to pick up the bank card before we left and he said he would. We go into the shop, pick up what we need (6 items non food). Checkout and DH realises he’s forgotten the bank card. We didn’t bring phones or anything.

The man on the till (there are no self service tills) didn’t say anything but did look extremely put out/grumpy when we apologised for the inconvenience. He was silent and visibly annoyed and DH said ‘it was just an accident you know’. The man didn’t say anything, still looked annoyed, and DH said ‘so much for customer service’. When we started to walk away, he turned round and asked for the man’s name which he told him. Then DH walked away saying that he was a twat, loud enough for him to hear.

I was mortified. DH was annoyed that I was okay with ‘being treated poorly’ by someone for no good reason. The man was in his mid 60’s I’d say and working in what I assume is a sometimes physically challenging retail role and to be honest, his reaction didn’t bother me. I go into that shop about twice a week on average and now don’t want to go back. It’s not a big shop so if the man was working he’d definitely see me and most likely be on the till. AIBU to be annoyed by DH’s reaction?

I don't know if you think that somehow excuses your husband's rude behaviour, but it doesn't.

Add kids in to the equation Op, and the pair of you will be leaving a trail of pissed off shopkeepers in your wake 😆

Assuming they've not been forgotten and left at home...

@SomeirememberI don’t know how you keep missing that when I said sorting stuff, it was at home before we left when I asked him to get the card.

@LadyBracknellsHandbaggno, I’m not sure where I’m trying to say that? I’m obviously embarrassed by it!

So when you left the house to go shopping, with no means of paying for anything, nor any means of contacting anyone, did you remember to lock the door?

If I was the man on the till I would have shouted back to your DH ‘What sort of TWAT goes shopping without a bank card or phone, you TWAT!

I don’t get why people are saying it’s poor customer service, what should he have said ‘Ahhh sir, no problem, just take the items, it doesn’t matter if you have no money, here at Poundland we just love giving stuff away for free!

Why did your DH call a man in his 60s whilst working a twat??? I don’t see what he did wrong. You are both in the wrong. Don’t you take your phone if you leave the house? The chances of both me and my DH going out without a phone are zero. It’s you guys that are in the wrong.

The Op was embarrassed and pissed off with him

but once we all agreed he was a twat…. Suddenly… back off!

Yes so you stood by mute as this exchange took place?

I imagine the shared key lives under the doormat or something similarly daft.

Pair of you need to get your shit together if you do ever have children… otherwise you’ll be leaving without nappies, milk…. The baby!

It's not poor customer service. It's really bad behaviour on the part of the OP's husband.
Imagine being so badly organised for such a small local shopping trip!

@MagdaLenorno, we were robbed by the time we got home

@SomeirememberI apologised to the man when DH said he forgot the card but that was my only input in the conversation. I did also say AIBU to be embarrassed by my DH as I am embarrassed so I’m not sure how I’m saying back off?

Maybe the fact that you mention 'silence and scowl' three times in relation to the chap on the till, who's just trying to earn a living? You left out the bit where your DH, a grown man, obviously had a little tantrum at his own stupidity, and decided to make the chap in the shop feel really shitty instead of behaving like an adult.

@LadyBracknellsHandbaggi was just giving a detailed description of exactly what happened as the same questions keep being asked so thought it would make things clear, I’m not trying to excuse DH at all.

Well, be careful. You seem to forget essentials.
Before you leave the house, check that you have what you need before you set off.

Looking annoyed isn't bad customer service.

Well let that be a lesson to remember your cards and phones infutre...at least they won't order lordy knows what goods via phone to have deposited at the local Amazon lockers and drain your bank accounts to boot..

And that doesn’t mean he’s not a twat because you haven’t seen it before. People like your dh don’t behave like this out of no where. They usually have this vile behaviour.

I would have been irritated too if you got to the till and realised no money. You were TWO adults and had no means of paying. It meant that he needed to restock the items.

I can exactly place your dh- rude to staff. And more so to an elderly person.

Brilliant! 🤩

Does your DH knows you’ve spent the day since getting back talking about this morning’s incident on mumsnet?!

had the front door been left wide open?

This.

Mid 60s is not elderly!

I’m finding it a bit weird that you both left the house with no possessions except your keys. However the reaction is OTT. Imagine working for minimum wage and getting called a twat because someone else can’t get it together.