I don’t like going for walks or to the park, I want to look around shops

[tohaverealisediam]

on Sunday I was feeling like the walls were falling in on me and just needed to get out. This is where my husband usually suggests a walk or taking the kids to the park- I find this so boring.

I realised that what I want to do, most it the time when I’m feeling like this- is just go and mooch around a couple of shops, get a coffee or lunch, maybe buy something new- nothing big necessarily, but maybe a little lamp or a new candle or something. This makes me happy. Going to the park, really doesn’t make me happy at all. It just doesn’t stimulate me whatsoever.

I am happy to take the kids to the playground of course, but parks or walks just bore me so much. My husband much prefers going for a walk. I don’t mind a walk so much if it’s in an amazing scenic location, in fact I do enjoy it. But I just don’t enjoy it when there’s not much to see.

I know that most mumsnetters love a walk etc and that’s great, but does it not just under stimulate you ?

it’s a bit of a struggle as obviously my husband and I have different preferences.

we ended up going out for a bit, going to a couple of shops, getting dinner out so I didn’t need to cook and clean up.

I am just so bored of staying in all weekend with two young kids and the only thing we do is maybe go for a walk, that’s all my husband wants to do as he finds going out stressful.

Same. I try very hard to stop the fact that the hobby I enjoy is shopping. I don't like it about myself, but it's a bastard of a habit to break. Damn dopamine.

Yeah totally dopamine addiction! But was talking to my mum today and this is also how I grew up. It’s what we always did.

That's what me and the kids do!

They're a bit old for the playpark now, there's only so many walks through the woods or round the country lanes by us that we're really interested in - and driving somewhere to go for a different walk seems no better than anything else, so we go for lunch in Ikea and take a wander round, or go to a shopping centre or whatever

It's still a good 2 hours walking looking at stuff is the way I see it, and normally we can combo it with some errands (new school shoes or whatever)

Ah ok thanks, makes me feel a bit less bad. I remember even being bored by walks when I was a child..

I much prefer a mooch around the shops too. Walks are boring, though I do them as I know they're good for me. Thankfully my kids are grown so no need to take them to the park.

What I do like is an interesting botanical garden, or even a garden centre, with a gift shop and nice cafe. I'm obviously getting old.

I know that most mumsnetters love a walk etc and that’s great, but does it not just under stimulate you ?

No. I love going for a walk. I don't really like shopping - I don't find it stimulating in a pleasurable way. There are umpteen other things I'd rather do! I guess the over-stimulation provided by screens and the possibility to browse and buy things 24/7 has made other activities seem under-stimulating to lots of people (including me - here I am on MN when really I'd be getting more out of going for a walk or reading a book).

I like a mooch around the shops occasionally, but only on my own - I usually go when the dcs are in school and it's quieter in the week. I'd get bored of doing it too often, but I get the urge a few times a year.

But I love taking dcs to playgrounds at the weekend and don't find that boring at all. We have a big variety we can travel to (all over London) and many of them have interesting designs and it's inspiring for the dc's imaginative play. I like park walks but at weekends we usually do more structured activities aimed at dcs - theatre or museum workshops, soft plays or attractions. We go out every weekend and don't have to choose between the park or being stuck at home - most areas have lots of child-friendly attractions which are interesting to adults as well.

I used to be like that. I’d rather go for a look round the shops, but something, grab a coffee or a sandwich.

I think you can train yourself to be different (if you want to).

I think I broke the habit during Covid when the shops were closed. Plus I got fed up of clutter because I was buying a candle here, a couple of new cushions. A pair of PJs. didn’t need it all 🤷‍♀️

Love a walk round the park now, chatting, rest on a bench half way, we’ve spotted so much wildlife, can go in my comfy clothes. Looking out for the change of seasons, nosying at people’s gardens. Beautiful flowers in Summer, Christmas lights in winter.

Is it because one is free whereas a family of four going for lunch and buying a little lamp will cost about seventy pounds?

You sound kinda like carrie Bradshaw and he sounds kinda like aiden

I'm a city woman, I love london and hate going on walks of any kind, unless theyre to shops or museums etc 😄, so I understand you x

I loath shopping, always have..I will go if I need something specific ..I have 2 border collies..I need to like walking. Some of our friends just take their dog to the village park,it's just a bit of green, with a football and cricket pitch,every Day. That would drive me nuts. We live opposite the South Downs, you can see the sea from the top.we do different routes, plus local forests and woods. We're also 10 minutes away from the beach.
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Yes this, it sounds like you must spend a fortune if this is the only thing you enjoy at the weekends. Can you not compromise and take a flask of coffee or hot chocolate and go somewhere new, or a family bike ride?

i know the occasional mooch round can be fun but it’s a sure fire way to overspend and also sometimes makes me feel a bit sad, like do I really need to spend money to be happy? Once you’ve stopped the habit surely you could enjoy other things? Life with young DC is relentless but it probably isn’t going to be majorly improved by giving loads of your money to primark or wherever.

I'm the same. I always feel happier on walks if there is a purpose or destination. Just randomly walking feels like a waste.
Love pottering the shops instead. Also I have an Unlimited cinema subscription and my local cinema is an hour's walk away. Couple of times a week I like to pick up a meal deal, walk there, have lunch and a movie and walk back!

My dc loath shopping so I take them to the park, museums and go for walks with them and go shopping with my friends. I also go for a walk with my friends and have a coffee en route.
I think there’s space for everything. Just work out a balance.

I prefer purposeful walking generally but I enjoy leisure walking a lot more if I get myself a nice drink from the cafe to take away with me! It kind of shifts it to being a sort of ‘treat’ thing in my head.

I do a lot of walking, 10-15k steps a day, but that’s 99% purposeful walking to get from A to B. I choose to walk most places when feasible because I know it’s better for me, not because I necessarily enjoy walking that much.

I walk regularly for exercise, although I live near countryside I choose to do my walking around the houses, hands up I like a good nose at people’s houses and gardens, it makes the walk go much quicker than looking at fields of cows.

i Always felt like a bad mum because I hate the park. When a close friend confided in me the same some years ago it eased the guilt. I do love nature and a ramble but if I’m needing a dopamine boost it’s definitely vintage shops and coffee bars. It feels lovely to order a pot of coffee in a lovely cafe, like I’m away from the burden of the house 🤣 It becomes a lot easier when they are older of course and you can sit in the park with a flask and a book or something else x

Totally with you OP

Oh this is us but switched. I love the woods and the park. Husband would rather stab pens in his eyes and will take kids for a walk around the shopping centre rather than the park. And he never ever goes for walks.
I do worry when we get older if we will manage to maintain any interests we like to do together.

That's me also to a T. Any walk (and I do a lot) must have some "reward" either at the halfway point or at the end, otherwise forget it, it would be like doing the rounds in a prison yard ha ha!

So I plan a few well trodden routes which have a coffee van and benches, or a place with a garden centre, or even the shopping centre. I never drive to any of these places or take the bus, just walk. But knowing there's something to do somewhere on the route - a purpose as you said yourself - I'm happy to walk miles.

Parks and nature walks are lovely, but that only works with company. When on my own I need something else.

I love both of these things!
It's great to mooch around the shops.. but i also really love walking. I do live in a rural area so it's a good job I love walking!

Could you maybe think of a way to combine these things?
Something I like to do as a family is pick a random town to drive to that we haven't been to before. Find a walk online with directions. Do the walk then have a look round the town shops and finish it off with a coffee.

I mooched around the shops today which included lunch (at Costa) and spent around £20 total.
But it was just me - not a family activity.
I'm not sure if the OP wants to do it as a family thing.

Dependent on where you are you can do both.

Ds and I went on a train journey today along the coast and combined a walk, cafe lunch and mouching around the souvenir shops.
There is a park, there was trampolines etc - big he’s 20 now and a wheelchair user so not really for us but would have been great for younger kids!

You are a consumer dream and an environmental nightmare - buying “stuff” for the sake of it.

Find a more productive hobby.

I’m the same so a middle ground for me is a nice fresh produce market maybe and a mooch round the charity shops. Or perhaps an Asian supermarket or similar. Meals out at restaurants are expensive but I like to choose maybe some nice affordable deli bits to take home and make something special for the family.