To lock up all our food etc when we leave

[ChangerMonNom]

We share a holiday cottage with DH family (his parents, older sister and partner) and use it at different times. For clarity- everyone contributes financially but DH and I the most as we are a family of four and earn more also.

In the summer holidays, we tend to go up the first few weeks of august, then head home. At this point, SIL and partner will come and use it. They probably use it more than us in total as they have no kids so can go during term time also, and can WFH so tend to have lots of mini breaks throughout the year.

When we leave, we make sure place is spotless and leave fresh milk (if SIL due to arrive), eggs, coffee, occasionally some treats and always whatever is left of all purchases (cooking oil, laundry powder, condiments, kitchen roll, plentiful loo roll).

On the flip side, SIL and partner will use all our stuff up and not replace it, meaning we often arrive late evening and find we are missing eg oil to cook dinner or even toilet roll.

We have mentioned this politely a few times but got no meaningful response (other than to say ‘it’s just the two of us, we hardly use anything’) This 100 per cent won’t be just thoughtlessness on their part - SIL is notoriously tight.

Anyway- we are due to pack up Sunday and I am considering putting all store cupboard items in a combination lockable suitcase and keeping them stashed away until our return. They will no doubt notice this as they take for granted things like salt and dishwasher tabs being available.

DH told me not to he so petty and ‘go high’, but honestly I’m fed up of SIL and her partner’s behaviour and this might be the only way to make them see what they are doing (although to he perfectly honest, I will slightly enjoy pissing them off).

So who’s right MN?

I can only imagine how irritating @ChangerMonNom must find her SIL, she's totally inconsiderate and mean. She's supposed to be a responsible adult and should know better.
@BiddyPopthe2nd has some great ideas and we've tried most of them over the years, but it is my adult children and our GC who use the house most and it just doesn't always work. We don't want to make going there a tiresome chore for all concerned, though we all do what can be done simply. For example they often leave early in the day to avoid traffic and have no time to wash the sheets - we usually have enough for them to leave the dirty ones near the washer so that the next visitor can wash them, often DH and me.

But too many rules can spoil the comfortable feeling of going to the house and it is different for us as it is only our DC and families who visit, so I don't feel so resentful - also we all do the basic housework but don't use a cleaner, though some family members do less than others. I don't mind stocking up with dishwasher tablets, toilet paper and cleaning products - they're my DC so I don't resent it.
One of my DS is good about doing the odd bit of DIY or decorating, one DD always leaves the place immaculate, but I try not to get bothered by minor problems and always take enough food with me for a basic meal and a drink, just in case. I buy second hand sets of vintage plates on EBay every now and again to keep the stocks up, though we break less now that the children are older.
As we get older I wonder what we will do with the house. We're already paying double council tax which, coupled with the cost of water and of running low heating in cold weather, is very expensive. I absolutely appreciate that we are very lucky to have a holiday home but we have it because we don't take foreign holidays (and very rarely have done in the past) and spend all our money in this area in the UK rather than on expensive flights and hotels. We bought a house that nobody local wanted, almost 40 years ago, and spent a lot of money on simple renovations which were long overdue.

We've always accepted that we will pay CGT when we sell, but the punitive regime coming in now means that we will probably have to sell before long. At the moment there are dozens of houses for sale in the area, not all second homes by any means. House prices are not that high there, there is simply no interest from anyone in buying. A (resident) neighbour is trying to move and has had no viewings in more than a year.
I imagine I will be slated for this, but wanted to say my piece. Be kind!

Agree

Do you have your own bedrooms?

Haha 🤣 love it, you did well!
what a cheeky comment about the cleaner!