To think a 17yo going to London (and staying overnight) is a bit odd?

[CVVFan]

Our eldest is doing that this week. Going completely on his own. We think he’s meeting someone but we haven’t asked. He claims it’s just for the “giggles” and explore beyond our sleepy town.

He could legally move out of your house at 16. How are you going to prevent a 17 year old from exiting the property?

My friends gay son used to do this to meet much older guys in hotels. You need to have a proper chat with him, he’s very vulnerable at 17, even more so if he’s as innocent as you say.

You'll know your son better (obviously) than a bunch of randoms going OMG he's getting a hooker !!!!! It just comes down to whether you have raised him to make good choices and whether you trust him. Assuming you do, let him crack on.

He's not going to fundamentally change personality overnight. Plenty of people of that age will, in fact, just go to london to explore.

I mean there’s nothing wrong with going to London aged 17, but the secrecy is a bit odd.

I’d be worried he was meeting someone of an unsuitable age - hopefully he’ll open up about his plan so you at least know what he’s up to.

Yes this is what I would be worried about. DS has gone into London with a friend a couple of times but they have gone and come back the same day, and was with friends. If he was going o his own and staying the night I would be concerned he was meeting someone he didn't know he had met online.

Probably heading for the fun of Soho & maybe a couple of bars/clubs to see what it's like. As others have said though you need ID everywhere in London, we were even asked going into a pub early evening & we're all in our 40's

I don't think it's weird at all TBH. Lots to do in London, and not everyone feels like they have to take someone along with them for everything.

If he is meeting someone, he's old enough that he doesn't have to tell you about it.

My male gay friends have some absolute horror stories of going to London on their own at this age. I wouldn’t let him go

My best guess would be travelling to a city with a good gay nightclub scene.

Very common for young gay people. Me and my gay best mate used to drive down most weekends and stay with mates in London just to go clubbing. I daresay, if we didn't have mates there, we would've got a hostel or hotel.

Please tell him from me - Heaven over G.A.Y, every time! Unless he's a cheesey pop lover.

At 17 I bunked off school to go to the Regents Park Theatre to see the matinee of Romeo and Juliet. And just to shake the dust of my phenomenally dull and smug home town from my feet and see a bit of Life.

Admittedly I was myself both dull and smug so he might not be going to see a Shakespeare play, but the main thing is that he’s told you where he’s going, he presumably has a phone and will get a return ticket? It doesn’t sound in the slightest concerning to me.

He’s potentially meeting someone he’s been communicating with online, or seeking to have the option of bringing someone he meets on an evening out back to his hotel. Both risky scenarios.

I’d be asking a lot more questions and would be inclined to say no: it’d be different if he was doing it with a friend / boyfriend.

Im staying in a travelodge next week with my 17 and 14 year old. I cant book 2 rooms because they need an adult for each room.

eg conversations about safety

Ah that's an excellent point. How has the 17yo managed to book a room?

Maybe he can only afford one night?

When I was in better health I'd do this. Go one morning early, stay one night - do/see loads & return the home the following night, usually after catching a show. I guess it depends how far you need to travel.

these days I'm not very well so a day trip with another adult (in better health) is the must I can handle (on a very good day) so pack life in when you're young!! (I'm glad I did, but still hate not being able to anymore)

@CVVFan

it does sound likely he's meeting someone he has met online. They've possibly booked the hotel. I'd be having a conversation about consent, safety, boundaries & ways to stay safe. I'd also be asking for the details of the hotel. Whose name it's booked under etc. & for frequent texts from him letting me know he's ok.

im 55, I left home at 17 & lived very independently (travelling loads) BUT the fecking Internet & meeting people online wasn't a thing! It was a different time.

Maybe someone he's meeting booked it

or a BnB they're often not that fussy about a single booking ...

He's 17. Not odd at all.

I think all the people saying “he is an adult” are being naive and/or disingenuous. He is not an adult and while there is nothing odd about going to London, any reputable hotels will not allow a 17 year old.

But Dalston Superstore over either!

You know him better than anyone on here so you are in the best position to know if it's true or not. If this was my middle DC I wouldn't believe for a second that she would go alone. Older one enjoys his own company so I wouldn't be shocked if he went alone.

Whether it's weird or not depends on his personality. If he's pretty self-confident and used to doing things on his own, then it's not weird. What are his interests? Maybe he does like museums?! Maybe you've just brought him up to be curious? I hope he has an amazing time!

I go on city breaks alone sometimes just to see somewhere new, it's called tourism. Absolutely normal behaviour.