To feel inconvenienced by a tragic accident?

[OnemargarIta]

I'm currently in Italy (staying in Rome) for three nights. It's my first foreign break in a warm country and I've been so excited and saved up especially.

We booked an excursion for today consisting of a trip to Sorrento where we'd spend time exploring, visiting shops and enjoying local food - and then on to Pompeii on the route back.

We've spent the whole morning/day so far stuck in traffic on the motor way. We are so behind schedule we can now no longer go to Sorrento first because Pompeii closes at 5.30 and there won't be time. A sit down restaurant meal will now be replaced by a takeaway which will be eaten on the coach.

We've just been told the cause of the traffic jam and it's because somebody has died in a collision on the motorway.

Instead of feeling saddened about the loss of life I just feel inconvenienced and pissed off that the highlight of my trip has been ruined.

Does this make me a shitty person? It just occurred that it might 😳

How original of you.Seem to remember op saying this.Hmm interesting.

Tragic things happen constantly all over the world. We might be unwittingly benefitting from some of them. You should show respect but it's not possible to feel sad about every single tragedy if you don't know anything about the victims.

Someone will be getting a knock on the door to commence everyone’s worse nightmare and all you have to worry about is having to eat a take away instead of a sit down meal.
Imagine someone you love going out and never coming back, then imagine someone being pissed off because your loved one died and ruined their day.,
Then realise how much of a dick you are.

Unnecessary and unfair.

Yeah OP, please make sure you spend the rest of your days carrying a heavy sense of morose at ALL the tragedy that’s going on in the world

No, it's not.

No they are not, some people just care. Not sure why you can’t wrap your head around that fact. Sheesh.

Exactly.
The people parroting this term, are using it to make themselves feel better, so repetitive.
How dare anyone have a different opinion to theirs!

A bit like this thread.

Not at all.

Flip it. Someone post’s on here that their OH was killed driving to work and they saw a comment on Facebook from someone moaning that their day had been ruined because of the resulting traffic delays. Everyone would be outraged and sympathising with the poster.

You are not unreasonable OP. It’s human nature to think of ourselves. When you have been looking forward to something and something stops it happening, the disappointment can be overwhelming.

Ignore the virtue signallers.

How is that unfair, that’s the reality.

No. I don't think so but what I'd suggest in moments like this is learning to then think positively and creatively about how you can make the most of the moment - life is short and you are where you are and it's often not as though you will be back in this same location again so I always think, when sh!t happens - which is normal in life (it doesn't always just happen to other people) - how do I make the most of this moment, this situation - and that might involve you making some quick decisions - you can't do anything about what HAS happened - just learn to accept it, not to dwell on it, and to move on as quickly as possible to think about how you make the most of the situation - life is full of unexpected sh!t that you have no control over. It took me decades to understand this but now I do - I think life is more enjoyable and less frustrating because I've accepted and understood that life is unpredictable - it's better to embrace the reality of life - the uncertainty (imho).

Another one parroting the same old term.How very original of you.

Unsure how those going on about virtue signalling can differentiate people who have lived through the hell of losing a loved one in an RTA from those who haven’t? Some of us are sadly talking from lived experience.

It’s an easy insult to chuck around I guess 🤷‍♀️

And this ornament I have just bore witness to in a shop.

A sense of humour, on this topic, you think it’s funny
Well if it’s ok with you, not everyone agree’s with you, that this thread is humorous.

There is no difference. There will be plenty of people who have lost a loved one in an RTA (I have myself, actually) who aren’t virtue signalling.
Its the handwringing and gross display of the moral high ground that’s the virtue signalling bit - over something that literally doesn’t even affect you.

Telling the OP she is a terrible person for being disappointed that her day trip was essentially ruined. Of course she was disappointed, some of you are behaving as though that makes her evil when it’s a perfectly normal thing to feel.

My uncle died in a RTA. The road was closed for about 10 hours. If I had read this at the time, I would still have rolled my eyes at posters telling the OP that she is wrong to be disappointed about her plans being changed. My uncle was important to our family and friends, but not to anyone else. I wouldn’t have wanted sympathy from strangers because I know they don’t really care. Their life continued despite any online condolences or emojis they put online. I’d rather they didn’t bother. My uncle would have been the first to moan about being delayed.

It's Mumsnet - they'd be lecturing the poster about how everyone has their own lives to live and while their loss is tragic, it's dreadfully self-centred to expect random strangers to care, and besides probably the FB poster was a single mum trying to get to work to make money for her three disabled children etc etc so focus on your own life, OP, kindly...

Tbf in the short term I’d fee angry and inconvenienced but I think I’d get over it in a few minutes and reflect on how lucky I was to not be involved in an accident.

Here's something for you to laugh at then, seeing as you're finding this thread humerous.
My brother in law, who was killed in an accident, had just got married and had a newborn baby. He was 29. Whole life ahead of him. His mother died four years later probably from the massive effect grief had on her. His child will never know him.
The accident was not his fault.
He was just driving to work.
A bit of context can make quite a difference.
These faceless people who have the audacity to hold up traffic and ruin someone's holiday plans are someone's son, daughter, mother, father.
Until you've been through it yourself, and I sincerely hope you never have to go through anything like this, you'll never begin to understand how laughing emojis and snarky replies will affect a person.

This sums up precisely how I feel having been in a similar situation myself. Not everything is a opportunity to compete on grief!

You think my sense of humour is directed at the heart of this topic or the ops comeback think about it