Train etiquette

[EmJA85]

Was getting the train back to London from a day out in Folkestone yesterday with my husband and my 1 year old. It’s not possible to book seats on that line. We arrived at the platform 30mins early because we knew it would be busy. As soon as the train arrived people literally pushed us out of the way to get on. Then there was a man with 2 bikes by the door, we couldn’t attempt to move to another carriage because we wouldn’t get on and the trains only run once an hour. People tutted and moaned because I was having trouble getting on. There wasn’t space to keep the buggy up so I had to carry him and people thought it was acceptable to let me stand holding a 12kg toddler, he can’t walk yet and is very energetic. I spoke out and was given a seat but everyone gave me dirty looks as if I was in the wrong. If I rocked up late or if seats were assigned I would say fair enough but I was there early and they all pushed in front. The icing on the cake was the seat I was given was in the area with the tables so he was given a makeshift drum and thought it was a social event so he proceeded to babble at everyone for the hour , people were not impressed. Is there an unwritten rule that you don’t get trains with kids? I don’t have a car

Lol exactly. Do these people hear themselves!

I think there’s an ‘everyman for himself mentality on trains’. I’d have given you my seat, but many would be oblivious.

Maybe give it a rest.

Who here has prioritised a bike, bag or dog over OPs toddler though?

Being shoved out of the way, it says in the OP

Maybe accept that opinions other than yours exist.

No you can't.

What?

I think it's the everyone out for themselves mentality. I imagine it's probably hard commuting with a bike on a train, so maybe bike guy had learnt he has to barge to get on...doesn't make it right.

Also 2 year old making a noise, might be annoying for others, but no more annoying than peoples 'very important' loud phone calls, so it wouldn't worry about it.

When my kids were little I tried to avoid peak hour travel, but obviously not always possible and you're allowed as much as next person. Just have to be prepared to elbow your way on, and lower expectations re people giveing special treatment or being considerate.

I never claimed to be the same . I agree I’m not

Sorry OP but you seem determined to see yourself as a victim here. So what’s the point of posting?

Personally I think any parent with their life together, prioritises having a car. Even in London. Sometimes you simply need a car, whether it’s because you’re carrying large/bulky things or travelling or just want to get away from public transport. As someone who lives in London and has been on many trains, surely you are aware of how overcrowded London can get during peak travel times? So at the very least when you’re taking public transport, opt for off peak travel where it isn’t as busy.

Why you chose to travel when it’s standing room only, is beyond me given you needed extra room for your belongings, seats etc. your need to travel isn’t any more of a priority than the cyclists so what you came across, could have been foreseen in advance and avoided.

Couldn’t your husband have held the baby and you the buggy. The folded buggy that could have balanced on the floor would have been much lighter than a child.

Surely the movement would shove one on to the train?

Some carriages on the HS1 trains have larger areas for bikes and buggy. It's worth asking the station people (guards??) where the carriage will be and where exactly the doors will open. I know that if I stand opposite a specific poster (at the moment it's one advertising a musical) on my station on that line that I will get the doors opening right in front of me.

I'd also plan if I'm with dc to get the 12 carriage train rather than the 6 and/or get the slower trains up from ashford but it depends which station you want to come into in London.

Pot. Kettle. Black.

Are bikes permitted on the the train you were on? They are not permitted on lots of trains, especially at peak times, so if that’s the case, the train staff should have dealt with those. Bikes are a PITA on trains as they are unwieldy and take up the space of at least 2 people.

In terms of general manners, those have long gone out the window. It’s every man for himself boarding trains and buses,I’m afraid. You’d have been better off leaving your toddler in the buggy, which is what most people do.

I wasn't replying to you. HTH.

That and, disabled people relying on the good will of the person to move and not swear at them is a daily occurrence.

I'm fully in acceptance of that. It seems that you haven't though.

No, I am. It's a discussion.
✌️

I think every train was 6 that day

Me three. But then I’d not be smiling at children so hopefully wouldn’t be mis identified as anyone who would fight for someone else to sit down, when my aim on a train is to get me to a seat as it’s every man (and woman) for themselves. I speak as someone who has extensive experience of the 17:03 from Padding to the south west and know exactly where to stand on the platform to get on without too much pushing.

A discussion? More like you picking at every word of the OP's posts and everyone who dares agree.

I smile at people in general.
A smile doesn't mean 'do you want my seat', 'do you want my seat' means 'do you want my seat'. I'm not a huge fan of random kids but also know how scary it is seeing only glaring or blank faces around me. 😁
When I commuted to and from Glasgow I was very, very aware of the door position for the 3 car and the 6 car trains. 🤣

Not really. She has many inconsistencies in her posts along the way, just a few of them mentioned here.
And she wasn’t alone, struggling with buggy and baby, her bloody husband was with her! What did he do? Let everyone push her? Not protect her? Not take the ‘heavy’ baby? Not find her a seat?