Can my assets be used in new partners divorce?

[littlebitpanicky]

I have been seeing a man for almost a year now and he has recently moved in with me, I know it’s fast but he’s been separated a while, she left him before I met him and he was living separately in rented accommodation.

He is going to be getting divorced soon and I’m wondering if because he’s living with me in my house, will my house and assets be taken into consideration when the divorce goes through?
It’s early days in the relationship and I don’t want him to lose everything because of me.
He is still paying a mortgage for the family home where his ex and children are living but was hoping to sell the home and use his half the money along with my home to put towards a bigger house.
I don’t have any children and own mine outright.
Has he shot himself in the foot by moving in with me?

This.

youve been together less than a year and he's already thinking about buying a house with you? seriously, for your sake, i'd ask him to move back into rented then he can get his own financials sorted and his chidlren settled into a new routine/home life. i always feel a man who doesn't priortitise his own kids should be treated with caution.

What do you see in this man? I’m interested as my (now ex) husband did this but we were nowhere near finalising the divorce. In fact he got remarried before the family home was even sold so had to keep a joint account as Mr and Mrs when there was a new “Mrs”! He dragged his heels with the divorce until he moved in with her, then it sped up a bit, then it slowed right down as they were busy on endless holidays and (I now know) planning a wedding and honeymoon). It took 4.5 years and we were supposedly “amicable” he just didn’t actually get anything done (except come in and take the TV when I wasn’t there, plus come in at different times including when I was at my sister’s funeral) I bear her no malice (or you) - in fact I was relieved when my children had to break it to me that he was getting remarried - I just can’t understand the attraction when they still have a key and access to the family home, and haven’t even got far with the divorce. The only thing I would advise against is calling her “ex-wife” just yet. Oh and please don’t go and scope her out in her workplace thank you - somehow, we just know 😂

OP says they have been together a year. How long would you have expected her to wait to meet the children?

Lots of very judgey comments about moving in with someone who is still married. Ignore those comments. Divorces can take years!

OP you have not given any details so very hard to give thoughts. Your partner needs to a solicitor as every single case will be different.

Don’t be ridiculous 😂

Yes this. I'd be far more concerned with protecting yourself at this point.

And so does the OP.
OP in this situation don't get advice from Mumsnet book an appointment asap with your Solicitor and find out where you stand. I believe, if he is living with you, unless you have a rent book showing his is a tenant paying you rent, you could be putting yourself at financial risk.

Then you are co-habitinhg and your assets are his assets if the ex has a good solicitor they will be coming for you, please get legal advice.

Why would that make a difference to how much he sees the kids?

How did he rinse your friend if they split their marital assets?

No he's not. He wants 50/50 with his ex even though that would screw over his ex who has primary custody and his children by default.

Things may have changed since my divorce but when my ex left to be with someone else her assets were safe. Also he could not insist on the house being sold until my child was 18. If he is hoping to sell the house he might be in for a disappointment. Like I say this might be outdated

That’s absolute rubbish. Don’t listen to this. Your assets are yours - there is no such thing as community of property in this country, let alone for cohabitants. There is absolutely no way that your assets can be at risk in this divorce or anyone “coming for you”. I personally think him living with you makes little difference but the absolute most difference it could make is to show that he doesn’t need as much to meet his housing needs. People do talk shit.

Because he has nowhere to host them for overnights

It depends entirely on the value of the house and the equity and how much is needed to rehouse. If the house is worth a lot and surplus to the wife’s needs (ie if she could live in a smaller house) then it will be sold. If there’s little equity and meets her needs without being excessive, the court are more likely to let her stay. There is no rule saying the mum keeps the family home and no rule that it can’t be sold.

Why can't they stay at the girlfriends house?

Total bollocks. He hasn't even seen them 50% of the time while he lived there.

He worked and she did childcare. Equal contribution. He could have gone part time but he didn't. He was happy for his ex to stay home.

What will he do with 50%? Move into a bigger house with OPand insist his kids live away from their primary carer half the week, after forcing a sale and demoting them from possibly a 3 bed to a 2 bed house with a bedroom to now share? Thanks dad.

Not because he didn’t birth the children but because he’s not the primary carer and the children need a home.

I can’t tell you how much I love this response.

Dear God, do I really have to explain? Their parents are barely seperated and she’s a new girlfriend. Of course they can’t be hosted there

how many girlfriends of less than a year wish to jump straight into step parenting?it's hard enough being a parent never mind being a step parent to kids experiencing the loss of their family unit and their parent shacking up with someone else. If this was a women moving into a man's house and bringing her kids there 50:50 after less than a year we'd all be commenting about safe guarding.

He should be living separately from you and seeing his children and rebuilding his relationship and life and concentrating on that. How long has he been separated

No need to be rude!
She's been with him over a year. He'd split with his wife before that. Why shouldn't he have them at his girlfriends house? Hardly like she's just a fling!

He's not even divorced yet. He's still legally married. This relationship is not yet a year old, I have tins in the pantry older than that and OP herself describes the move as "fast". It's much too soon for his children to be using his short term girlfriend's house as their second home and essentially be landing her with stepmother duties.

He needs to get divorced and tie up the loose ends of his old life before he starts a new one. Why isn't he?

So you’re housing another woman’s husband and wondering how he can get more of his children’s home so that he can use your asset to buy himself a bigger home?

A veritable prince.