Why’s my sofa in your lounge?

[BdayQ]

We are in the process of moving house and are currently in a rental whilst we wait for the new house to be ready (expecting it to be about 6 months)
We have a fairly new 3 piece suite but only room for the chairs in the rental place, so ILs offered to store the sofa until the new house is ready. They have a big house and said it could go in a downstairs bedroom that never gets used. DH took it over in a van and took into the room it was supposed to stay in.
Anyway, we’ve come to stay with them today for a couple of days, went to see SIL this evening and there’s our sofa in her living room with a toddler and a dog sat on it! No covers or anything and just sat there like it’s supposed to be there.
DH didn’t know it was there either until we saw it but he wasn’t saying anything, so it was left for me to question why it was there… nobody could give a good reason why it’s at SILs house and were looking at me like I was mad for asking. DH then said we wanted it back in the spare room at ILs house rather than being used in SILs heavy footfall house and potentially getting damaged.
We did say if there was a problem storing it at ILs as per the agreed plan, it wasn’t a problem and we could arrange a storage unit instead. ILs just looked surprised/confused and said it was fine to move it back to theirs “if that’s what you want” in a bewildered sort of way. Apparently SIL scoffed like we were idiots for even bringing it up and said “FFS, what do you think it’s going to happen to your precious sofa?!” although that was when I was out of the room and DH only told me later that she said that.
AITA here? I pretty much know I’m not, but ILs and SILs reaction suggest they think there’s nothing wrong with moving it - but the audacity! And why the secrecy? Apparently they didn’t tell us because it wasn’t a big deal. But like I say, there’s also seemingly no good reason for it to have been moved, they’ve not even attempted to give a reason/excuse, just the offer to move it back to ILs “if that’s what you want.”

Haha they obviously planned to steal it for 6 months! Are they a what's mine is yours family in general?

That's bizarre!

Omg that's hilarious. Spoiler alert, your sofa is gonna get trashed! Yuk re the dog, let her have it 🤢

I would be furious about that and want it professionally cleaned! Remove it and put it into storage.

They're entitled pigs who are deliberately gaslighting you. Time to take a wide step back from them as this will show up in other ways.

Wow the cheek! I'd be furious! If they wanted to use it for a while they could have at least asked.
I'd understand borrowing something small - but moving your sofa into their house is insane 😂

I think this is one of those situations where people see the same thing completely differently.

My SIL often asks to try on a ring I have. It’s my mum’s very dear to me, huge sentimental value. Nothing is going to happen to it if she tries it on. But I don’t like taking it off, I don’t want it on her finger. To her, it’s a random piece of jewelry. To me, it’s part of my mum.

To your PILs and SIL, it’s just a sofa. Literally meant for sitting on. To you, it’s your home furniture. Where you feel cosy and safe and it’s yours.

I would be absolutely furious.

Tbh i would be expecting his Sil to buy you an identical sofa to replace the one she and her family have comandeered and they can just keep yours.

Do they honestly think that's the way to treat other people's possessions? Absolutely cheeky ill mannered behaviour.

That’s so strange.

did SIL just so happen to not have a sofa at the exact time you stored yours at in laws?

Where is her own sofa?

Misses point of thread, but where is their sofa?

Surely they’re gaslighting you. They surely can’t be so thick as to think that is normal. CF’s of the highest degree - the lot of them. I’d be furious. I have DC but I agree with you OP, other people’s kids and pets all over your sofa, what a cheek. And to try and make you seem like the unreasonable one is just the cherry on the cake. Your poor DH. What have you married into?!

I'd get it cleaned and removed to a storage unit. I'd be taking a big step back from visiting in-laws too. They broke trust and it's hard to regain.

Taking the piss pure and simple!🤯

I agree. But I’m totally on your team OP. Of course they’re being unreasonable.

But HiRen is right - there are some people who just don’t get that things are precious, or understand the wish to take care of them and keep them pristine. And that includes their own stuff. I knew a family once who lived in chaos and would buy an expensive piece of furniture and then just trash it from day one! Toddlers would climb all over it, spilling their cereal.muddy dogs would scramble on to it , dirty bare feet would be placed on it. I hated watching! They just didn’t care, when simply using a throw would have done the trick.

You get virtue-signallers who say ‘Oh, I don’t care about THINGS !’ Well fine - you do you, but I definitely care about MY things, so watch your step.🤨

That’s actually unhinged - who on earth would give someone’s sofa to their adult children. I have no words of wisdom, just wanted to validate your sense that the behaviour is far from usual.

Pay for storage

SIL is a CF

At the very least I'd expect it to be professionally cleaned before being returned. I wouldn't be too bothered about it being sat on but would be pissed off about the dog being allowed on it

I’ve always hated that it’s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission thing. If any of them thought you would have agreed to them having your sofa for six months they’d have run it by you. They know what they’ve done isn’t ok and are deflecting by mocking you and trying to make you feel selfish. They are all total piss takers

That is bloody outrageous OP. Who the hell does that!

Weird right? Thank you!

The room it’s in at SILs is a large open plan space, with their own huge corner sofa, a two seater sofa and two arm chairs… so they don’t need ours there as well, there’s just no need for it to be there. They have 5 kids and there are always people in and out of the room so it’ll be getting plenty of use I imagine, but the numbers of seats in the room already was more than adequate.

I was more just shocked when I saw it there, then bemused by their reaction, now I’m bloody annoyed. Going to send DH round today to get it moved.

that is completely OUTRAGEOUS. I don't think you can trust your ILs. They are sneaky, cheeky fuckers

I'd tell them keep it but you're wanting x£ you paid for it.

YANBU.

Massively out of order! There’s a massive difference between parents storing it and sister using it. With five kids and a dog there’s no way it’s coming back to you in the condition it left. They sound very entitled. The fact that they didn’t even ask you shows they know it’s not okay. Are they normally like this?

It doesn’t matter what their lounge layout is, it doesn’t matter if they were all sitting on deck chairs and needed a sofa. It is yours and they have bloody taken it without asking! That’s theft.
Next time they’re on holiday, just go and take their car for a week, don’t tell them and let them find out, see how they react to that.