The turning of the seasons- how can I make winter more bearable?

[HyggeLonging]

Posting here for traffic. I know I am being unreasonable because it’s still late July and I feel stupid posting now, but I struggle with mental health in winter.

I live alone and work from home. I love autumn leaves and spiced lattes in September and October, but November to February sent me into a dark place last year. I have no family nearby, so I don’t look forward to Christmas. I will look into signing up as a volunteer for Christmas Day so I’m not alone the whole day.

I tried SAD lamps years ago but they gave me worse migraines. I’ve had therapy. I want to change my mindset so I’m prepared. I have warm winter clothes, hot water bottles, a big duvet, fairy lights. I drank wine too often in the evenings last winter after work and have stopped drinking because I was putting on weight - sedentary job.

Not options - getting a dog, the lease won’t allow it. SSRIs because the weight gain will depress me more. Getting a job outside the home - I cannot drive due to chronic migraine. I work long hours to distract myself and so that I can afford to have the heating on.

Any ideas? Please be kind. I know it’s still summer.

I would try and enjoy the current season while you can as November to February is till a way off. Have you read any of the hygge books or other resources about that as a lifestyle? Eg
https://www.everydayhealth.com/wellness/what-is-hygge-and-why-is-it-good-for-your-wellbeing/

Can you book yourself a sunshine holiday for say mid January to give yourself something to look forward to, if finances permit? That's what I'm planning to do as Jan/Feb was so miserable this year weather wise.

I also live alone and WFH so I get you. Is your work schedule flexible? I take a longer lunch break so I can get out for a walk (unless the weather's really awful) and then make up the time by working later as it's dark by then anyway.
Otherwise, I just live life as normal and get through it. March arrives soon enough.

I’m going to read more about hygge. Thank you.

It’s not stupid to post now - it makes sense to prepare whilst you’re feeling ok and have the energy to put some good things in place.

Firstly, is taking holiday in December or January a possibility, so it breaks up the period you find most difficult and you have something to look forward to? A sun holiday is ideal, but just getting away somewhere new for a change of scenery may help. Would your workplace let you be a digital nomad if you are already home based?

I find keeping active and saunas helpful. If you have a community sauna in your area, it can be a lovely thing to do. Like this: https://www.community-sauna.co.uk

Other thoughts - are there any hobbies or interests with a social element that involve regular face to face time that you could consider? Join a choir, knit and natter, book group, indoor bowls club, netball club?

Finally, do consider finding some regular volunteering. It is uplifting to do something useful with likeminded others. You are of more use to your local homeless shelter on Christmas Day if you are a regular and know roughly how they operate.

Yep, holiday in the Canaries. Gives you the dual benefit of sunshine and something to look forward to.

Plus try to at least enjoy summer while it's here. Get outdoors as much as you can. Presumably you don't work 12 hours, seven days a week. Days are still long rn - it's not dark till 9.30.

Yes, it’s flexible and I usually work until 8 pm or 9 pm. I will try to walk every day, even if it’s just to the local post office.

A lunchtime walk in the daylight, even if the weather is crap. You need fresh air and daylight.

Movement, I'd say dancing round the house if you enjoy it or a mini trampoline maybe?

A January holiday, I always went to the canaries around tgat time before DC. Pleasantly warm, still sunny.

Vitamin D, Magnesium and B Complex.
Electric candles
Heated throw
Weighted blanket
Daylight and exercise every day
Fresh fruit and vegetables
Meditation
Yoga

@HyggeLonging I'm with you on this. The dread has already begun to descend. We're having fantastic weather and it's wonderful. I love it so much.

I’m really enjoying summer - it’s just turning a little autumnal now.

Regular volunteering is a good idea. I’ll look into it - thank you.

Possibly - I can work from anywhere with WiFi.

I was thinking that earlier. The nights are starting to draw in already. The real best of the summer is gone by the time schools break up in England. I'm still enjoying the light nights and not having to wear jumpers and socks for now though. One thing I've heard but not tried is every day (or week or whatever) between the spring equinox and the autumn equinox write something fun and positive on a piece of paper and put it in a jar. It may be a quote, affirmation, fun idea to do etc. Then between the autumn equinox and spring equinox when everything is grey and depressing, take a piece of paper from the jar (at roughly the same intervals as you filled it so it lasts) and read/enjoy/do what it says.

That is a good idea, thank you. Reasons to get out of the house would help. Stocking up on vitamins. Perhaps declutter by selling on Vinted. Keep a diary.

My Grandmother always said to get out in the summer as much as you can and get a tan to help you through the winter.
I take vitamin D supplements, it really helps.

Thanks, I will look into Vit D supplements. I hardly left the house last winter.

I like having a project to start as soon as Christmas decorations are put away. I start with a good cleaning and then let the house rest for a week or two..no newly placed decor just some clean surfaces. In 2024 I painted a room and in 2025 I reorganized my pantry and switched DS and DH closets. After I painted the room I changed out some linens and drapery so not a total overhaul but a refreshing of the space. The pantry I purchased new baskets and repurposed the space to include pots and some dishes becuse just 2 of us now and we really don’t have that much stored food. If you are in your home a lot (like cold winter days) it helps to move things around to make it feel different and more interesting.

I didn’t even have a tree last year. Yes, perhaps declutter and organise is a good idea.

It's winter where I am in Melbourne, though it's been a very sunny one, so here's my three penn'orth.

I can see you've given a lot of thought and time to this, @HyggeLonging and the planning is good. I live alone too, and in my case if I wasn't obliged to be out of the house might stay in too much. Not good.

It looks like doing things at home is one thing, but getting out of the house more another.

What do you see looking out of your window? Can you see shrubs or trees? Is there a garden? It's always good to look out on nature. Plant a window box. Look out winter flowering plants or ones with all-year round foliage. As far as you can, make every window view an attractive one.

Probably most people need Vit D though be careful with supplements and multivitamins in general as it's easy to overload on B6. Basically, doctor's orders or give them a swerve.

Yes to the daily walks - easy for me to say as I have to walk the dog whatever the weather. Still do it daily, but definitely on the sunny days.You don't drive but look out nearby walks that might be a bus or train ride away on the weekend. There might pub to pub walks where you are. Consider a walking group.

As already mentioned, volunteering is good. As well as charity shops, think of local art galleries and museums. I do this and the intellectual effort of speaking without notes about unlabelled objects is stimulating.

Make your warm winter clothes attractive to you, dress up for yourself indoors. If you're person who wears make-up, wear it.

If money isn't an issue, have a vase of flowers in your main room.

All the best.

This might sound mad but are you sure you have to stay in the U.K. all winter? Could you sublet your home and move abroad for the winter months to somewhere warmer and sunny?

i only ask because my dad HATES the U.K. winter. He feels the cold, gets down and just hates it. So 25 years ago they started going abroad between Nov and March and working over there (he ran his own business but you work from home so could it be done?)

You only get one life, make the most of it!

Goodgym?
Borrow my doggy, if you like dogs but can’t have them at home?

Tbh with no kids and a wfh job I would do a nomadic month or longer somewhere.

I know it's already been mentioned, but Vitamin D. My GP told me that most Irish people (I'm in Ireland) are vitamin d deficient due to the short amount of daylight we get, and I presume the same could be said for British people.

She also recommended getting out for a walk in daylight every day and if possible, to roll my sleeves up a little so that I can absorb the vit d even if it's not sunny. Also try to eat eg oily fish, egg yolk, milk, yoghurt, and many breakfast cereals which are fortified.

Make a list of series that you'd like to watch, and work your way through them? I did this last year, got recommendations from friends and from reviews online. Join your local library if you like reading. Libraries can be social spots and often (here anyway) run classes or talks.

I'm almost a hermit from Nov til March, definitely suffer badly from SAD, but the above have all helped me the past 2 years.

Good luck OP.

Definitely vitamin D!!

I'd also think about starting some specific "winter" hobbies. So things you only do in winter that you enjoy. It might help change your mindset.

the regular volunteering is a great idea. Social contact is the other thing that will make a real difference. Start stalking your facebook. I found a group on there which is completely grass roots and local to where I live that I now volunteer with. I also found a social group just for women to connect and reach out to others. There are regular meet ups for all kinds of different activities.

A holiday is also a great idea. Would it even be possible for you to find a cheap break away somewhere in the UK and still work but have different surroundings? If your work is flexible you could use more of the daylight hours to explore the area and then work in the evening. You could also blast the heating as you don't have to pay separately for it.

And finally - put together a fun dance play list and get up and groove to a couple of songs at random times during the day. It's a great way to improve your mood.

The things that get me through are

• my log burner - I live rurally
• Getting as much fresh air as possible, walking at lunchtime and walking, cycling, running at the weekends
• Decent winter clothes
• A running machine for when the days are short and dark
• diet - lots of healthy veg and wholewheat