SIL furious niece cut her knee.

[Clockchair]

So I was baby sitting DN 13 months for the first time. We were playing in the garden, she has started toddling about so only walking a few steps at a time. She was playing with my DD 3 years and she's tripped and scraped her knee. Just a normal little scrape, didn't even cry and laughed her head off when we put a special princess plaster on.

Well SIL collected her and is furious. She says I should have watched her more closely as she isn't walking properly yet and this is the first time she had been injured and it was when I was watching her so maybe I shouldn't babysit again. She is also upset that I didn't ring her when it happened.

Now for me it's not a big deal so I didn't even think to ring, that being said I have a 3 year old who is permanently covered in scrapes and bruises so maybe my opinion is a bit skewed.

Was I really unreasonable? I am gutted that she thinks I wasnt supervising properly.

You could do that, but she is learning, so surely you can see that denying her the opportunity to learn her new skills, in a safe (grass) environment with an adult very close by also has it's drawbacks? How will she learn to be more stable?

There is nothing 'cool mum' about allowing your child to learn in controlled and safe environments. I'd argue it's totally negligent to deny them the opportunity (given we are throwing around labels).

Your SIL has overreacted but I think if your niece is so young it wouldn’t have hurt/would have been easy to quickly send a message saying something like ‘just to make you aware that DN had a little scrape, didn’t cry, carried on as usual but is going to have a plaster on when you collect.’ I think that would have managed your SILs expectations and she would have had less of a freak out.

I would refuse any further requests to babysit. She's rude, ungrateful and unrealistic.

Time to stop the babysitting until she gets a grip on her overreactions.

My sister did similar to your SIL many years ago. I never babysat again. Simple

I was watching her so maybe I shouldn't babysit again.

Win win for you then 👏

You've done nothing wrong. I remember DS nursery phoning me in a tizzy because he'd fallen and scraped down one side of his face, trying to give me an account of how it happened. So much so his key worker was waiting for me at the door on pick up - I wasn't at all upset or bothered by the scrape and neither was DS, no fuss it heals and they'll do it again and again. Your SIL is being a bit precious, accidents happen. With many more to come I'm sure!

I think you've had a lucky escape if you're not allowed babysit anymore 😅

Wow - she's starting a steep learning curve. Toddlers, bumps and bruises....who knew?

Yeah she was my fourth child too so I was well versed in what toddlers are like and had it been the situation in your op I wouldn't have even thought twice about it. You didn't do anything wrong and hopefully she'll come to realise that as her toddler grows

Totally agree. This is why - when my kids started walking, I replaced all my hard floors with grass. And I carpeted over every pavement leading from my house in a 5 mile radius. They are much older now though so I’ve recently replaced the grass with shards of glass 👌

because you are a decent and realistic mum, unlike the little shit OP is describing who wants to keep her precious kid all shiny and new. I wonder if she does the same to her shoes!

Why does your SIL think those kids plasters are sold in shops? What does she think they are for?

I think you're completely in the right. Children are meant to fall and scratch themselves and learn their limits. If a small child has no cuts or bruises then they're not active enough, imo!

She needs to chill out. I wouldn’t be babysitting again if Im made to feel like I cant look after a child. My child is full of scratches and bruises from playing I dont ever blame anyone, its meant to happen.

If she treats those who look after her child as though it’s a privilege for them, she’ll soon run out of babysitters. I wouldn’t offer again OP and if she asks, make sure you remind her how angry she was about a minor scrape and that it’s impossible to guarantee that that kind of thing won’t happen. So unless she accepts that then the answer should be no - you’re not up for being at the pointy end of her temper whenever there’s a minor incident.

I was thinking the same thing! 😂

so maybe I shouldn't babysit again

Was it a this point your DSIL expected you to throw yourself at her feet and beg her to let you be allowed to babysit again...

😂😂😂Coffee all over the screen !!

It's not. It's precious...

That applies to parenting your own child. If you are looking after a wobbly 13mo for the first time, I still maintain that I’d helicopter as the likelihood of them tripping is almost 100%.

The child was toddling on grass not burning coals.

This is so so wrong. How on earth can a toddler learn to balance/co-ordinate etc. when they're being prevented from doing so?

She is absolutely ridiculous.

Never babysit again

And this is why 'the village' has died a death.

Do I want to be accused of being negligent when a child does what they do, which is fall over sometimes, get hurt sometimes, get upset sometimes etc etc

Normal parenting reactions are turning into these heightened responses and quite accusatory, not just with family members but nursery workers, teachers, friends parents etc etc.