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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I laughed in her face when she tried speaking to me?

146 replies

seasid · 21/07/2025 18:57

Basically me and my friend were pregnant at the same time, we were both young mums (21) and we both were going through it together. We both left our abusive exes and it was like we didn’t care that we were going to be single mums because we had eachother. Our due dates were only 2 weeks apart.

long story short, it turned out the entire relationship my ex had been cheating on me with her. They got together during our pregnancies and he was there supporting her during pregnancy, during birth, post birth - raising her baby instead of his own. During lockdown I was there hunting in multiple shops post C-section with a newborn baby for baby milk because i had no one else to help and he was there queuing in shops for that girls newborn. Paying for her and her baby to go on holiday with him instead of paying a single penny for his own child.

Her being my friend, she knew the abuse I had endured - but she had the audacity to help him with his smear campaign against me. He was relentless and evil - ensuring everyone was turned against me. I was a single mother to a newborn, during lockdown and I had everyone sending me hate upon hate because my abuser and this girl was targeting a horrible campaign to tear me down. She would post things saying I was scum and that I didn’t deserve to have children. I was lost, broken, depressed and struggling with ppd and ptsd - my baby’s first years were stripped from me.

there’s so much more to it, but they broke up and we both now have five year olds. I saw her in Tesco a few days ago and she smiled at me and kind of motioned her body to approach me and as she went to open her mouth to say something I just burst out laughing and turned away from her. I didn’t know what else to do, I don’t do confrontation and it was better than crying. I would have full sympathy for her protecting my abuser if she wasn’t my friend who knew every detail of what he done to me. But she knew the vile horrible things and still helped him abuse me. I remember me going to her very early on in my pregnancy in tears because I could see messages on his phone from a contact ‘Dave work’ where he was telling that person that he wishes he was with her and not me, she wiped my tears away and comforted me… she was ‘Dave work’. This evil girl watched me have a mental breakdown when pregnant over something she had contributed to and lied:

i know some people might say to ‘hear her out’ or be mature and use words instead of laughing, but it’s such an awkward moment that my heart was racing and I couldn’t think straight. Was I wrong? Should I have done worse?

OP posts:
allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 21/07/2025 20:46

@seasid What a horrible evil cow!!! you are well rid!! you did well just laughing in her face!! I think I would have spat in it!!

Maddy70 · 21/07/2025 20:53

She is your abuser too. Stay well away

AngelicKaty · 21/07/2025 20:56

@seasid I'm sorry for all you've been through OP, and I think laughing in her face was a fantastic response given you were caught on the hop. And if anyone on here suggests you "hear her out" I'd tell them to give their heads a wobble! What's there to hear out? The situation you've described could only be worse if that disloyal, hateful bitch had been your sister or mother!
Seriously OP, you did a great job. Hold your head high and have nothing more to do with her - ever.

Cherrysoup · 21/07/2025 20:56

Fantastic reaction, imo! Bloody well done. What a nasty cow she is. Do you think it’s your ex’s baby she had?

Zellycat · 21/07/2025 20:57

She did something she can never ever recover from.

Laughing at her is the best revenge

Hsmith11 · 21/07/2025 20:57

Omg! You did nothing wrong! Keep being kind to yourself and don’t let your good nature be pulled back into a fake friendship. That girl lied right to your face and your ex sounds like a complete arse - honestly you deserve better x

fthisfthatfeverything · 21/07/2025 20:58

Didntask · 21/07/2025 19:02

Is he the father of her baby too?

This??

MaryBerrysFannyHammock · 21/07/2025 20:58

@seasid 👌

Vilena · 21/07/2025 20:59

Hey there I am a mum to a baby girl she’s 13 months old very active baby I’m looking for mum friends and to hang out with as well I live in Dublin 12 Crumlin x

TiredMummma · 21/07/2025 21:00

Wow, yes she is dreadful person - I’m surprised you didn’t punch her in the face 🤣

Catladywithoutacat · 21/07/2025 21:01

Absolutely don’t hear her out, she is scum. I have the same issues with neighbours, tried everything to get me evicted and now the tables turned they want to speak to me, no thanks. Karma has a way of dealing with these people

MrsTigerface · 21/07/2025 21:03

Perfect response, good for you. Well played. I have no doubt that your laughter will have left her feeling most discombobulated, as she deserves.

I am so sorry for what you went through, though. It was awful, and many congratulations to you for coming out the other side x

IberianBlackout · 21/07/2025 21:03

Fuck being the bigger person, let her reap what she sowed. The nerve in even trying to approach you.

Hedgedone · 21/07/2025 21:03

Laughing at her was cold.
Perfect.
Well done you.

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 21/07/2025 21:06

Sometimes the best power, is the power to laugh and move on. She deserved nothing less.

FYI, I'd bet he is her child's father..

Dontlletmedownbruce · 21/07/2025 21:07

I hope you are enjoying the responses here OP! Well done xx

Rachie1973 · 21/07/2025 21:12

seasid · 21/07/2025 18:57

Basically me and my friend were pregnant at the same time, we were both young mums (21) and we both were going through it together. We both left our abusive exes and it was like we didn’t care that we were going to be single mums because we had eachother. Our due dates were only 2 weeks apart.

long story short, it turned out the entire relationship my ex had been cheating on me with her. They got together during our pregnancies and he was there supporting her during pregnancy, during birth, post birth - raising her baby instead of his own. During lockdown I was there hunting in multiple shops post C-section with a newborn baby for baby milk because i had no one else to help and he was there queuing in shops for that girls newborn. Paying for her and her baby to go on holiday with him instead of paying a single penny for his own child.

Her being my friend, she knew the abuse I had endured - but she had the audacity to help him with his smear campaign against me. He was relentless and evil - ensuring everyone was turned against me. I was a single mother to a newborn, during lockdown and I had everyone sending me hate upon hate because my abuser and this girl was targeting a horrible campaign to tear me down. She would post things saying I was scum and that I didn’t deserve to have children. I was lost, broken, depressed and struggling with ppd and ptsd - my baby’s first years were stripped from me.

there’s so much more to it, but they broke up and we both now have five year olds. I saw her in Tesco a few days ago and she smiled at me and kind of motioned her body to approach me and as she went to open her mouth to say something I just burst out laughing and turned away from her. I didn’t know what else to do, I don’t do confrontation and it was better than crying. I would have full sympathy for her protecting my abuser if she wasn’t my friend who knew every detail of what he done to me. But she knew the vile horrible things and still helped him abuse me. I remember me going to her very early on in my pregnancy in tears because I could see messages on his phone from a contact ‘Dave work’ where he was telling that person that he wishes he was with her and not me, she wiped my tears away and comforted me… she was ‘Dave work’. This evil girl watched me have a mental breakdown when pregnant over something she had contributed to and lied:

i know some people might say to ‘hear her out’ or be mature and use words instead of laughing, but it’s such an awkward moment that my heart was racing and I couldn’t think straight. Was I wrong? Should I have done worse?

God no. I often play devil’s advocate and try and see the flip side but on this. NO.

You were brilliant!

Phoebesparrow · 21/07/2025 21:17

18 years ago,I was pregnant with my ds

I thought we where a loving couple and my bestie was very supportive

She was there for me all the way through the pregnancy and afterwards

She helped me in early labour,helped me breastfeed,helped me in and out of the shower,changed my babies nappies,looked after my older children-you name it,she helped with it

Turns out they had been banging for months behind my back-she hadn't been there for me,she'd showed up for him theyd been shagging everytime I turned my back

It all came out when they beat me up and tried to snatch baby ds

Encouraged by her,he dragged me through the courts (just because she felt like playing mummy to ds) and launched a massive smear campaign against me-this almost broke me

As soon as they broke up,he lost interest in ds and fucked off (we never saw nor heard a thing from him since)

I battled on,and about 10 years ago I got a fb message from her,telling me (not asking) that she wanted me to hear her side

I'm not ashamed to admit I laughed and pressed the block button

About 4 years ago,I was in London with my now dp when I heard my name

It was her-I gave her a 'don't you dare come near me look' and to dp 'that's her'

We both looked her up and down before walking off

I have zero interest in hearing her side-she let me down at a time I was at my most vulnerable and I don't owe her a thing

You are the same-you owe her nothing

Buddhalover · 21/07/2025 21:18

Cannot believe the absolute audacity of the kretin! Perfect response from you. Back of the net!😂

LAMPS1 · 21/07/2025 21:24

I don’t think there is anything she could possibly say to you that would be worth hearing OP, after what she did.
Her continual, deliberate betrayal was really the worst kind. Evil in its way.
I’m glad you looked her in the eye and laughed in her face.
Well done for not crumbling. You did so well.

yakkity · 21/07/2025 21:25

Phoebesparrow · 21/07/2025 21:17

18 years ago,I was pregnant with my ds

I thought we where a loving couple and my bestie was very supportive

She was there for me all the way through the pregnancy and afterwards

She helped me in early labour,helped me breastfeed,helped me in and out of the shower,changed my babies nappies,looked after my older children-you name it,she helped with it

Turns out they had been banging for months behind my back-she hadn't been there for me,she'd showed up for him theyd been shagging everytime I turned my back

It all came out when they beat me up and tried to snatch baby ds

Encouraged by her,he dragged me through the courts (just because she felt like playing mummy to ds) and launched a massive smear campaign against me-this almost broke me

As soon as they broke up,he lost interest in ds and fucked off (we never saw nor heard a thing from him since)

I battled on,and about 10 years ago I got a fb message from her,telling me (not asking) that she wanted me to hear her side

I'm not ashamed to admit I laughed and pressed the block button

About 4 years ago,I was in London with my now dp when I heard my name

It was her-I gave her a 'don't you dare come near me look' and to dp 'that's her'

We both looked her up and down before walking off

I have zero interest in hearing her side-she let me down at a time I was at my most vulnerable and I don't owe her a thing

You are the same-you owe her nothing

I just wish your current DP looked her up and down and said ‘Christ she’s rough’ before you two walked away

JIMER202 · 21/07/2025 21:26

Are you sure her child isn’t his? Either way I hope you are getting CS off him even tho I know it’s a pittance. I hope your little boy is doing well!

BMW6 · 21/07/2025 21:28

Oh PERFECT response OP! Here's hoping she feels proper humiliation! 😄

DisabledDemon · 21/07/2025 21:29

I'm astonished that you didn't punch her in the mouth - she certainly would have deserved it. However, laughing at her was probably the next best thing (and wouldn't get you arrested).

Does she want to feel better? Oh well, tough. That's not going to happen.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 21/07/2025 21:30

Well done.
She doesn't deserve to ever hear your voice again.
I hope you're doing great now..