Fat bias exists

[Oldfatbrenda]

Over a year ago I posted as I couldn't find work. I was a size 20/22 and also in my 40s. I had head and shoulder interviews on teams and when they saw me in person it was a no. I felt like this was both age and weight bias.
One unpleasant woman who was clearly into her own looks and fashion, looked me up and down and when I left I heard her laughing. I'm convinced it was about me.
I was lucky and did get a way better job than that a few weeks later and at that point I had made the decision to try much harder to lose some significant weight.
I'm now a size 14/16 and I know without a doubt that people treat me differently. It's sad that many people are this way and look down on fat people as being lazy, having no willpower or that they will be too unhealthy to do their job.
Just for the record, I have had 1 sick day in over a year. Most of that time I was still technically obese.
Before this job search I did a bit of physical work in a hotel and yes it was bloody hard because of my size but I pulled my weight (sorry) almost more than the others to show I could and wasn't holding the team back. Yes I'd be dripping and have to go to bed when I got home but I was a model employee.
Anyway just wanted to come and say all that. I wasn't imagining it - but luckily there are still people who don't judge on looks and age. Thank the lord.
Anyone going through similar, don't give up. It will be harder but not impossible.

I don't know how you're wanting the voting to work but does anyone not think fat bias is a thing?

I don’t think anyone would claim that fat bias was not real. The question is whether or not it is justified.

There are loads of biases based on non protected characteristics: accent, appearance (good looking or not) clothes etc.

Depending on the context and the role they can be more or less justified. eg Banks employ people with Scots accents in call centres because the Scots are perceived to be good with money.

If I was employing someone as a receptionist I would discriminate based on appearance.

If I was employing a nanny for toddlers I would discriminate based on my perception of their ability to keep up with the children and model a healthy lifestyle. Some obese people say that their weight does not impact performance, but it depends on the role.

Yes fat bias definitely exists.

I don’t think there is any real doubt about this is there?

Oh it definitely exists.

My bmi was 35 in January 2024. Now it’s 27. People I’ve worked with for 2 years now suddenly speak to me, after never giving me the time of day before. Mums of my kid’s friends on the school run will now stop and chat. People hold doors open for me when they didn’t before. I’m no longer invisible.

Can’t really talk from a work prospective as I have stayed in the same job and it is all from home so doesn’t really make a difference but in the last 6 month I have dropped from probably realistically a size 16 even though I didn’t like to admit it to a small size 10. The difference in how I am treated by how people treat me and how strangers talk to me is staggering, I am no longer invisible. We are on holiday and people just chat to me more and just seem more interested in me as a person. The difference has really surprised me, I am treated so differently.

I'm sure it does exist in some situations but I'm struggling to think of an example of when it has happened to me. I've been significantly overweight for most of my adult life but can't recall ever feeling I was being treated differently because of it. The times when I've been down to a "normal" weight I didn't feel I was treated differently either.

Of course it exists.

You can fire fight a bit by being very attractive, incredibly well groomed or “bubbly” 🤢 but it’s definitely a thing.

Bias against large people does exist and it’s appalling.

I think there is also a bias against thin women in that a lot of larger people assume- and openly say so- that they are stuck up bitches with no emotional needs or feelings or any problems at all because being thin makes life so easy for them. It is apparently perfectly acceptable for a whole office team to comment on the body of a thin colleague because they aren’t ‘real women’.
However, because being thin is basically an advantage the fact that people use it as an accuse to behave like arseholes is overlooked.

Absolutely agree with you OP.

Having been both fat and slim - I definitely got treated differently. It's shameful that this happens but people are cruel and tribal.

There are people that deny this is a thing and claim it’s just your confidence that improves so people treat you better 🙄

I don’t disagree that fat bias exists. But hearing someone laugh and feeling convinced it was about you does not mean it WAS about you. What would have been funny about you being overweight? I actually don’t get why most people would laugh at that?

I also think if you’re feeling better about how you look you’re less likely to imagine that people are laughing at you.

I agree it definitely exists but also throwing in that since losing weight, I am a lot more confident and I dress a lot better as well. So if I get more attention now then it's also probably because of those things.

Yup. I lost a substantial amount of weight at one time. The whole world was much nicer to me. I was particularly disappointed in some men who I thought were good friends and treated me completely differently afterwards. Was quite a shock.

So if someone was in a wheelchair, born with only one arm, or a portwine stain, you wouldn't want them on reception? Nice.

Oh godddd I’m so glad everyone on here agrees because yes, it very much does exist. I used to be what would now be a size 4 (didn’t exist back then so quite a long time ago!) and now size 22/24. In my defence my being disabled and unable to move 2/3 days out of each week (plus prescribed steroids), has contributed a great deal to it but society is broadly uneducated on matters of what else can cause weight gain besides poor choices(!)
Decades of the media’s obsession with skeletal women has ensured that the default view of the masses, is that fat = bad. Fat = a bit simple/not very intelligent. Fat = unclean & smelly. Fat = must be permanently hungry and will steal all your food 🙄 So having been so tiny and now so big, I know what it’s like to be thin and have experienced the gigantic shift in how people treat me, how they respect me or don’t, as the case is now. It’s appalling.

Absolutely bloody true @Oldfatbrenda I have missed out on jobs in the past when my BMI was 37+. Now I back into size 14 clothes I am getting job offers again. I saw one recruiter a while ago who commented that clients were worried that I would need time off because of my size!

Yes it is conscious or unconscious bias.

However you complain about fat people being seen as not trying hard enough, yet you say yourself you only lost the weight when you tried harder, so I'm not sure how fat people being judged as lacking willpower is unfair.

No, it's because people perceive Scottish accents to indicate warmth and trustworthiness.

None of what you have said here reflects terribly well on you, really

They would have the protected characteristic of disability - so it would be illegal to discriminate against them.
Protected characteristics are things an individual cannot change.

Why not afddress the substance rather than resorting to personal insults?

I assumed you'd be aware that most people think discriminating on the basis of appearance is lazy and superficial.

Of course it exists. You probably employ it yourself. If people notice you more or treat you better when you have lost weight are you possibly also behaving differently? Maybe you're dressing more to be noticed, feeling more confident, chatting to strangers?

Weight loss is not about willpower - the science has shown this to be the case for decades. This is why weight loss medication has proved to be so successful. But yes I guess the general public are likely to resort to stereotypes about fat people.

I’m not saying that it doesn’t exist but it’s not just a ‘fat’ thing. We all judge for different reasons. You gave some great examples without meaning to:

One unpleasant woman who was clearly into her own looks and fashion,

Unless she told you that she was into her own looks and fashion then you judged her in the same way that you are saying that you were judged, based on your looks.

looked me up and down and when I left I heard her laughing. I'm convinced it was about me.

Maybe she was, maybe she wasn’t. You don’t know!