To ask how much you pay for beauty services like your nails, hair, etc?

[ChattyChai]

I’m 39, turning 40 at the end of the year.

My husband thinks I’m being ridiculous with what I spend, but we can afford it comfortably and it makes me feel good.

I spend £42 every 3-5 weeks on nails, and every 3 months or so an extra £15 to get my eyebrows waxed and tinted.

i spend £140 every two months on getting my hair extensions moved up, and then every 4 months an extra £77 to get my roots done.

he thinks this is silly money and an extra £110 a month we could be saving, but I work, it’s my only real splurge each month and it makes me feel great. Am I spending too much? How much do you spend?

Nothing really at the moment, occasionally a haircut every few months. I’m about to start having a monthly massage though, we have enough money and we both get our own spending allowance each month so I thought why not.

i just do nail every 6 weeks - 45
hair twice a year - i dont care much for my hair tbh - 75 (i have waist long hair)
make up and skin care - astronomical as im an addict when it comes to that hahah

I think the beauty treatments costs are a bit of a red herring (and I commented earlier).

The real issue is the imbalance in your financial power. You are married so all your assets are joint, and you should feel like a team.

DH and I have a joint account that we get paid into, then all the bills (car, mortgage, food, childcare etc) come out of that. We then get the same amount of "pocket money" into our personal accounts, which we spend on personal stuff (our own clothes, hobbies, presents, beauty treatments if I had them lol).

Anything left over in the joint account goes into the joint savings.

When I was on maternity leave, I contributed far less and still had exactly the same pocket money. When DH started his own business and I was still salaried, I contributed far more than him but we still always both get the same spending money.

Who do you think will be in charge of the expenses on one pension?

Please go to see someone at your bank and look at starting your own pension, or workplace pension or both! Everyone needs one, you have the next 25yrs to fund yourself in old age, you can't rely on this man.

What @TomatoSandwiches said - do it through your job and pay into your pension straight from your salary - he won't see it and now your pay is changing there might be less questions.

He is trying to make you spend your savings so he can keep his - the boiler? Ffs.

Hair I reckon about £500 per year (or £40 per month on average). This will be for 2 x balayage and 4 cuts.

Eyebrows probably £10 per month on threading

Massage maybe every 3 months or so £50

Maybe a pedicure in the spring £40ish

In total, I reckon about £800 - £900 per year

I have my workplace pensions but because of such a long time out on maternity etc it’s really nothing to write home about. I have a small amount of savings which I was going to invest into my pension but now I’m changing jobs that’s less likely, but I am going to have an NHS pension.

Hair free as dil is a hairdresser and refuses to take money (bring her homemade lasagne /pie though). I grew my nails long so just use nail varnish. Eyebrows I tidy myself although I'm going to cave and get them done.

I don't have enough eyes to roll at your DH...

£30 on hair twice a year.
£0 eyebrows
£0 nails although it used to be £40 a month
£0 done to face/skin

I probably spend about £15 a month on bits of makeup. £10 every now and then for a new foundation.

We’ve both not long got in from work and I’ve broached this with him, asking if we can discuss. He’s got very angry, said if I want financial independence “that fucking badly” I can get a “real job” and start “pulling my weight”, before storming out to the pub.

£35 every 4 weeks on BIAB nails
£70 ish every 5 week on hair
£100 ish every 8-12 weeks on skincare

DH earns a lot more than me, I work PT term time only and I have never been expected to how much I spend or what I spend it on. Your DH is a dick.

38 nails every 3 weeks
170 hair (highlights, toner and cut) every 8 weeks
tint and pluck my own eyebrows now
used to pay 20 for them as well plus 50 for lashes but stopped that

This has to be a joke, how can he say that with a straight face while simultaneously judging your personal spend?!

I have never said this before on here but are you sure there aren’t other issues around control that you’ve maybe been pushing to the back of your mind? It feels unlikely that this is a one off issue..

Nails - mani = £25 ( no gel / false just paint: mani) : pedi & mani about £60 together - manu monthly; pedi every 2-3 months

hair - cut every six months, c £100; trim every quarter : free (it’s a pal); dye every 2/3 months £100. Roughly £500 on hair a year

brow wax - every 6 months but I have little eyebrows and very fine fair hair

no waxing - hardly have any body hair (am blonde)

massage - £70 a month
Thai massage - £70 every 2 months
facial - £75 a month
swim and gym membership £65 a month
other healing things c £50/70 every few months - gong baths, etc especially in winter months

thinking of injectable’s etc… as in 40s which would add c £500 a year I guess

possibly surgery - blephestry (eye lids) around 5k one off

Nothing regularly. Hair when it looks scraggy, about £40 maybe twice a year. Nothing else.
I do occasionally have a massage or other treatment to relax.

What is your pretend job then? Do you just pretend to do it?

I have a pedicure and manicure probably twice per year (not acrylics)! At around £60 for both, with gel polish. I can't afford to have it done frequently.

Hair every 8 weeks cut/blow-dry £33. Then 4 times per year half a head of highlights £50.

Eyebrow, lip, chin wax every month £16.

I'm low maintenance to be honest!!

You need to start this thread again. In Relationships.

This thread is not about hair and nails. It is about an angry and controlling man who doesn't see you as an equal partner. His money is his and your money is his.
Childcare is always a joint expense because the children are joint, unless there is an offset somewhere else - e.g. I paid holiday clubs, husband paid school fees (he paid more, but I earned less, proportionally it balanced). You certainly do not owe him for having his children and being on maternity leave, taking a career hit to allow it. If anything, in a divorce, he would find he owes you for that.

Golf fees are a personal expense, bollocks to the networking, not at 3x a week unless he is also meeting clients, not just other colleagues he can meet with in the office. Beauty stuff is also personal.

Anger at trying to have an open conversation about this is a really, really bad sign. If 20 years on MN is anything to go by, it is time to start lining your ducks up and deciding if this is what you want for yourself.

£25 a month on nails £97 every 7 weeks on haircut. That's it!

Hair £48 every 10-12 weeks. That’s all.

that’s only a cut and blow dry.

£130 every three months on highlights and cut

Do own nails, wax own muff.

£600 every nine - twelve months on getting filler for my lips and marionette lines.(I cannot tell you how much I love this! Money incredibly well spent.) it looks great.

I have an appointment for Botox for forehead and crows feet wrinkles. If I like it, that will be £360. Probably every 4-6 months.

£200 per month on mounjaro. I'm including that here as I'm now a size 10 and was size 18-20 this time last year.

I turned 47 a year ago and I was so down about how I looked and felt. I had a proper "rage against the dying of the light" moment and decided feminism is about doing what makes you happy, not feeling guilty for vanity.

48 next week. I look and feel fantastic as fuck. I am sooooo much happier and healthier. But it has cost a shit load of money in my case to polish this turd 🤣

Your husband sounds like a massive dickhead by the way. Why is childcare only enabling YOU to work? What a backwards sexist chauvinist.

Golf course wanker.

$30 eyelash tint every 6 weeks ish
$200 highlights for hair every 4 months
$50 massage each month
occasional facial

I’ve been an associate in a law firm for about two and a half years now. No job progression and the work environment has got worse and worse to the point that I’m leaving to work in the public sector, completely unrelated to law and hoping to work my way up there. I’ll post in relationships now.