Worried about Dd being ginger in the uk

[Takestwohourstoniptotheshop]

Redhead, Golden haired…

We are moving back to the uk next year. Dd was born in the country we’re currently living in. The majority of people are dark haired, brown eyes and tanned skin.
Dd is reddy gold hair, blue eyes and fair skin. She gets attention everywhere she goes about her hair and eyes, people compliment her a lot and are very gushing about her looks, it’s lovely

My impression is that this is very different in the uk and cruelly this is used as an insult almost, is this still the case? The thought of it is heartbreaking

10 year old DC has FLAMING red hair (Its incredible!) and has had 1 carrot top comment (Which he decided was stupid because his hair is not carrot orange its Pokemon fire orange apparently) and his friends mum used to call him Ginge which he actually loved and otherwise the comments have been so positive.

I grew up desperately envious of my cousin and a girl in my class who both had flaming red hair, they were both on the receiving end of some shit but I do think that things have hugely changed and it just doesn't happen anymore.

I agree.
And I’m in Ireland

Jesus 🙄

Of course I’ve done this as well, please don’t be patronising and tell me what I need to do with my Dd

When were you at school?
It's less of a thing these days.

YABVVVVVVVVVU

My sister niece and nephews have red hair. The kids do get annoying comments at school, like small microaggressions, she has complained to the school but there is nothing really they can do. It's a large inner city comprehensive kids are like that. Once you get to teens people tend to be very complimentary about it and all adults are full stop the benefits are you go grey a lot later. To be honest there's not a lot you could do about it, but it's really not worth changing life decisions for

I never got the red hair prejudice in the UK. I actually was not even aware it existed till my early 20s and then it seemed weird to me.

I think ginger hair is beautiful and have had more than one person tell me I was “weird” for liking red hair. So backwards.

My experience was that kids with the real carroty coloured hair and freckles got teased more (like Oi! Gingernut) than strawberry blondes ( which sounds like your child) or the Auburn haired.

A lot of it goes down to personality. Kids that let it show get teased more. From what I know of children about me, redheads seem to be just as popular as anyone else. If you've brought them up to be secure and confident they'll be fine.

Do you have red hair? If not you really don't get how the negativity can affect you.

I have red hair, got comments at school (annoying but nothing I couldn’t handle) but more irritating was when my children were born and had a reddish tinge to their hair and people commented on it (usually massively going over the top to say how lovely it was but really really overcompensating to ensure no one thought they thought badly of ginger hair 🙄).

I have found that in some countries (particularly America in my experience), they LOVE red hair and I have never received so many compliments about it - and when I have been in some parts of Asia, would attract crowds of children who would want to touch it.

I can understand your worries OP but sounds like you have your head screwed on and will make sure your daughter is ok.

You asked for advice on how to deal with people who may make remarks about your daughters appearance. This is advice.

You need to teach her that both negative and positive comments on her appearance aren’t the be all of life and that there’s alot more to people than the way they look.

????

I mean “never got” as in “never understood”.

Yes, I get your point. But as you don't have experience of the negativity that comes with having red hair especially in England you have no idea.

I'm a red head and it has never been a problem for me. I'm 70 and like the colour so much I now dye it to keep it the same.

There are several red haired children in DS class, they are all popular and DS thinks one in particular is "beautiful". Ive never heard any of the local kids say any of those terms like "ginger" or "carrots" etc, isn't that rather old fashioned

You need to teach her that both negative and positive comments on her appearance aren’t the be all of life and that there’s alot more to people than the way they look

This

My dd gets teased at school for being a bit ginger but in a friendly not mean way. (Banter not bullying). I think lots of people love red hair - really wouldn’t worry.

As a baby we got stopped every time we left the house by someone telling us how beautiful DS's hair was. Since about age 2/3 no-one really mentions it either way.

Where does it say either of us measure her bu looks only? Its one small thing out of many, we do not focus on looks

I actually don't think YABU to worry - parent of redhead here, I do worry! We had a very nasty experience with a neighbours kid when my child was only a baby so maybe this has coloured my experience 😩

Again, please don’t tell me what I need to teach her, she knows that, that has been covered

Just the words "carroty" and "gingernut" have such awful negative connotations for me.

And it isn't always the case that if you're confident, you're fine. I was confident until I moved from Scotland to England at the age of 8 and my confidence got destroyed by it. As a young teenager, older boys used to come up and ask "are your pubes ginger?". Once in my early twenties, a group of men outside a wetherspoons yelled "ginger dog" at me as I walked past on my own.

I don't think people realise what it's like, so it gets dismissed in a way other prejudices don't.

I have 3 red heads and we've had no probs. I think that anti red hair sentiment is in the past.

My 6 yo daughter was born with a full head of red hair and has had nothing but compliments about it.

She now has the most beautiful, waist length red hair, blue eyes and freckles. The only comments we get are about how she looks nothing like us and where did her colouring come from, but as absolutely not in a negative way.

No child has ever commented as far as I know. Maybe she's just lucky, but I get the impression that children and young people are far more accepting than in my own 80s childhood.

My son was one of three in his primary school class with red hair, we are in Scotland so red-headedness is nothing to be remarked upon. He has never been teased about it.

It is absolutely associated with anti-Irish sentiment, and anti-semitic sentiment.