To dislike the term ‘maiden name’?

[BangersAndGnash]

It is so sexist.

It comes from a time when ‘maiden hood’ , being a virgin, defined a woman pre marriage, when she was given the name of the man who was entitled to that virginity.

There is no common male equivalent, ‘maiden name’ , oh, the name women have before they take their ‘real’ name, their married name.

Can we use ‘birth name’ and rid our names and status from this idea of being a ‘maiden’?

We can move with the times, few people say ‘Christian name’ any more.

Yes- and while we’re at it can we stop referring to the main bedroom as the “master bedroom”

Yes, I agree that birth name is better. See also getting rid of Miss/Mrs as titles.

I have far more issues with Mrs which is one apostrophe away from Mr's.

And "Miss" like you've missed out by not being married.

Ms = none of your fucking business what I am currently doing with my vagina 👍

You call it what you want. For me I'll keep calling mine my maiden name. Doesn't bother me in the slightest

I actually think it's rather suitably awful for what it represents!

you don't have to use that term though, in UK i have always used née (as in the French term). In German you use a similar construction.

i have always said main bedroom too. Always use Ms since i found out about it as a young teenager. And when ordering online, where possible i use Mx.

this is the internet, YMMV

I agree, if only because many women retain their birth surname upon marriage, professionally or more generally.

I don't like it. Née (born) is a better alternative.

I always use Ms (I'm married) but it's not unusual to still get "Miss or Mrs?" and that people express surprise and confusion about "Ms".

Yeah it's not great. I don't ever say it. I think I would always avoid it by saying 'she used to go by Smith, now she's Jones..' clunky but I can't bear to say the word.

I also hate being asked if I'm a Miss or Mrs. Why should people know whether you're single or not by your name?
I always go by Ms and unless specified otherwise I would use it by default for all other women.

So ships will have no more maiden voyages and politicians no more maiden speeches?

Languages retain vestiges of old time cultural prejudices, it is a part of what makes them interesting. Totally sterilising a language also makes it poorer.

I hate it. It's just my name, thank you very much.

🙄

we are talking about people's names and the connotations that "maiden" attaches to the value of womanhood.

Not some toff breaking a bottle of bubbles over a ship that has never been in the water, or some MP standing up for the first time in the house of commons.

There are lots of words we no longer use because they are unpalatable.

No issue with voyages or speeches, or even cricketers bowling a maiden over 😄

People's names are another matter. It's not a huge issue for me but I'd prefer not to use it.

I like it. I’m going to keep using it. It’s also descriptive and precise for those in the category of “women who have changed their name on marriage”. If you’re not in that category, you don’t need to worry about it.

You do realise that Mrs, Miss, and Ms all are shortened forms of Mistress? Whereas Mr is a shortened form of Master.

I prefer surname and previous surname (if any). This would apply to people who have changed surname for other reasons (like children who are adopted by a step-parent or other) as well as women who change their name when they marry.

I quite like the old, flowery imagery of "maiden", doesn't disturb me.

That said, I haven't changed my surname, and am now Ms, because both Miss and Mrs would be a lie.

I didn’t think anyone used it any more!

I’m very keen on keeping the feminine in our culture, I think it’s always under attack, so I’m happy to use the word maiden, I think it’s a beautiful word.

I've no problem with the word, really, it's an easy and well-known way of explaining pre-married surname. However, I do understand the feminism sentiment you're getting across - both my husband and I barrelled our names when we married so that I wasn't the only one changing my name.

Exactly this. I’m adopted and my birth surname was not my surname before I was married.