To dislike the term ‘maiden name’?

[BangersAndGnash]

It is so sexist.

It comes from a time when ‘maiden hood’ , being a virgin, defined a woman pre marriage, when she was given the name of the man who was entitled to that virginity.

There is no common male equivalent, ‘maiden name’ , oh, the name women have before they take their ‘real’ name, their married name.

Can we use ‘birth name’ and rid our names and status from this idea of being a ‘maiden’?

We can move with the times, few people say ‘Christian name’ any more.

As a married Ms I often feel like people react as if my marriage is on the rocks when I insist on Ms

And in Spanish women keep the name they were born with

Yes, I can't help but think that someone is actually exposing a fair amount of underlying misogyny when they say, "Bachelor connotes cool, spinter connotes old and dagy."
I love Mary Daly's etymology of the word spinster. I'm not sure if it's consistent with a bog standard linguist's take but for me it has given the word such power.
http://www.cat.nyu.edu/wickedary
"a woman whose occupation is to Spin, to participate in the whirling movement of creation; one who has chosen her Self, who defines her Self by choice neither in relation to children nor to men; one who is Self-identified; a whirling dervish, Spiraling in New Time/Space."

I'd look up "maiden" in the Wickedary but I don't actually own a copy. Just remember learning about the way that "spinster" is the feminine form of the word that was also used to refer to male spinners. When usually the generic is the masculine form of a word.

Doesn’t bother me one bit.

This is also true and very articulately put

@Newbutoldfather

"So ships will have no more maiden voyages...Languages retain vestiges of old time cultural prejudices, it is a part of what makes them interesting. Totally sterilising a language also makes it poorer."

This. It's simply language that has evolved past its original meaning, the term maiden name is quite neutral. I no more think of maidens when I say or hear maiden name than I do of white people denying black people the vote when I hear or see grandfathered in, but that is where the term grandfathered in emerged from originally.

We cannot and must not try to destroy every nuance of language by making it acceptable to (some) modern day ears or soon everything will be Double Plus Ungood. There's enough Orwellian behaviour around today without that.

If people don't want to say maiden name, nobody is trying to enforce it, and if enough people don't use the word it will die out, naturally, as language does evolve over time.

Also true & v articulate.
in other languages the equivalent of miss is just used for a young woman and the equivalent of mrs is used for an adult woman.
Eg Fraulein / Frau
Madamoiselle / Madam

I can't really think of a time I've used it or someone's used it to me anf I'm over 70. I also use nee.

Birth name.
Birthing parent.
Chairperson.
See also: Main bedroom, main copy.

How boring and bland out language is becoming.

What's so interesting about maiden name, exactly?

I'm also a Ms but a lot of people seem to find it very confusing! They also assume that it means I'm divorced and that's the only context in which people use it. I do live in the back of beyond, though.

I've never met anyone who doesn't just say mother or father, to be fair.

56%/44% it’s like Brexit!

How progressive and interesting our language is becoming.

Yes, exactly.
I have been married twice (divorced once, widowed once) and have never changed my name.
It's my name FFS (nothing "maiden" about it)

It's always been progressive. Language changes and evolves all the time, and despite the prescriptivists' best efforts there's nothing we can do to change that.

The term 'Chair' is now such common currency that any other word would sound odd. I've never personally used 'birth name', just family name or merely name. Birthing parent is from a different ideology whose bastardisation of language was a concerted attempt to erase women, not achieve equality for them. That's been nixed, thanks to women's resistance and the supreme court.

There's a vast difference between female-specific language like 'mother' - a biological function as well as a relationship - and regressive language like 'maiden name', which, in a different sense, also contributes to female erasure.

I can’t really get too worked up over this to be honest. More important things to worry about in the world