Photo of husband posted on Facebook group with allegation - legalities?

[Hattie24]

Earlier I was alerted to a post by a woman on our town’s community Facebook page. It is a rant about a flat in her block being used by a group of prostitutes which is causing issues at unsociable hours and how the landlord isn’t doing anything about it. Under this there are photos of various men at the entrance of the block of flats and one of them is my husband. The insinuation is that these have all been visiting that flat.

I want to know the legalities of this woman posting such an allegation as she is outright refusing to remove the post. It is obviously extremely humiliating for me (friends and no doubt colleagues have seen it) and there’s so many comments underneath. We’ve been on a ‘break’ due to various issues but still living together and haven’t been intimate for nearly a year so I don’t need a lecture on how I shouldn’t have married such a man.

Is it me or is someone putting up a post like this without any thought for the consequences on various families etc utterly disgusting?

No, you're right, we don't know. And the men probably don't care either way. I may have over-reacted there, having known of one in the past who said she rather enjoyed her job when the men were attractive. I'm sure she was in the minority though. My apologies.

I can't believe you're angry about the woman posting photos and not your skanky husband using prostitutes. Probably trafficked, if they are a rotating group of immigrants not speaking the language, as you said in a previous post.

I think you should focus your ire on the revoilting actions of your (hopefully soon to be ex) husband rather than the residents objecting to a brothel in their building.

Oh. The consequences of his own actions.

The internet is forever and nothing goes unposted or unshared these days so it’s best not to do stuff that gets your name thrown about badly in the first place.

@Hattie24 I wouldn't post anything about her DH if I were you OP because then you'd be breaking the law too (the Malicious Communications Act 1988). You could message her that you will report her to FB and the police for breaking the law if she doesn't take down the post.

Well - if he has been visiting prostitutes, he doesn’t deserve a medal - or indeed the loyalty of the OP, imo, @Gloriia.

And frankly, if more of these disgusting men who think women’s bodies are just things they can buy get shamed in public, maybe it would help destroy this trade in women’s misery.

If you have to traffic people for whatever your business is, and have to force them to work for you, you are a modern day slaver, and you and your clients do not deserve any consideration from me.

'If' being the operative word. A public shaming without facts or evidence is a bit shit imo.

@Hattie24 "My husband says the physio session was with a teammate who does this on the side as a favour for the team manager so there is no evidence in terms of a booking. However he says this team mate will vouch for him." So, this professional physiotherapist rugby-playing team mate he was visiting lives in that block of flats? Well, that will be easy to check OP via an internet search on his name and/or business name (assuming he's self-employed).

Indeed, @Gloriia - but even if the OP’s dh isn’t a client of this brothel, other men are, and I have no compunction for them. I also have my doubts about this man’s innocence.

I get the feeling OP more than suspected this, and has been turning a blind eye up to now. One of those women who's fine letting her husband use prostitutes, if it means she gets to avoid having sex with him.

Her only problem seems to be that it's all gone public, and she might get "a lecture" about the man she married. His behaviour is fine if she can lie to herself about it, but mortifying if everyone knows about it. So she's come gunning for the poor woman stuck living next to a brothel, who felt her only option was to name and shame the johns using it. OP is pouring all her vitriol onto this desperate woman, while excusing the disgusting behaviour of the person actually at fault here - her husband.

It's hard to have much sympathy.

If he's been visiting prostituted women he absolutely deserves a public shaming. If he's brought embarrassment and humiliation to his family through his disgusting behaviour, that's entirely his fault and no one else's.

According to a FB vigilante!

Facts, proof, evidence, landlords, the police. All better things for the avid Face booker to be concerning themselves with.

I understand this puts a spanner in the your getting back together decision but your energies are misplaced. It is up to your H to challenge the poster, not you, you aren’t the one supposedly being defamed?

If you don’t want to be embarrassed by your H’s ‘activities’ then you need to distance yourself from him.

She doesn't know if there is or isn't truth in it tbh

Bloody hell OP, if disgusting men were visiting my flats to visit prostitutes I'd be photographing them too. Good for her. Can you imagine how unsafe it must make the female residents feel knowing there's strange men turning up at all hours?

Your marriage is finished and I'm staggered your anger is directed at this woman. You obviously don't trust him or you wouldn't have asked for proof of the 'physio' appointment. You're on a break. You don't have sex. Just walk away, what's the point of trying to save this relationship?

You’re being entirely unreasonable, they re clearly at the end of their tether with these happenings and I don’t blame the trying to shame people, you say you don’t believe your ex, so maybe look closer to home to people to be cross with.

Just caught up with this thread from last night.

Some interesting updates from the OP.

This comment makes you sound deranged

The fact that OP herself isn't convinced her STBX isn't visiting prostitutes tells us all we need to know. The FB 'busybody' may or may not be operating entirely inside the privacy laws but I can't understand why people have more sympathy with the STBX than with her. If this post was called " I suspect that someone is running a brothel in my building using sex trafficked women" then many would be advising getting photos of the Johns and naming and shaming.

You sound as bad as your husband tbh OP with wanting to find the partner of the 'snooping cow' 🙄 and photograph him somewhere dodgy.

And if you believe the absolute bullshit convoluted story your H has told you then you need your head reading.

Your H is using prostitutes and your focus is on the wrong person.
This woman is doing you a favour but you're on MN calling her names (and calling women Karen is a misogynistic slur by the way).

Raise your bar and focus on divorcing the piece of shit you married.
Because any man that buys consent is absolute scum.

Odds on that the ones sticking up for her H are men. Anything thread like this is usually crawling with punters.

'I can't understand why people have more sympathy with the STBX than with her'

I have no sympathy for the stbx you just can't go around doing stuff like this as has been said.

I've read your updates. You're making it very hard to support you. You show no concern for the women your husband has exploited. You say it's not illegal, as if that somehow makes it acceptable. You insult a woman for speaking out about being forced to live in a place full of men like your husband. If that attitude came through in your message to her, she’s not taking it down. She has every right to be angry. Why should she show you compassion when you show none for anyone else?

Even if she took the post down right now, the horse has already bolted. Family and friends will have probably seen it whether they divulge so or not.

OP says it’s not illegal. Well if they’re trafficked and not consenting or consenting through fear and threats then actually it could be illegal. Is he making sure they are fully consenting and how is he doing this if they have limited English?