Non-binary teacher?

[Thompson198]

Name change.
I’ve got a 5 year old daughter due to go into year 2 in September. We’ve just been told that the teacher for next year is a non-binary/‘non-gender-conforming’ man who wants to be referred to by ‘Mx’ (pronounced mix) and they/them pronouns.
Quite a few of the parents have already complained and started looking for other places at local schools because of this.
what do you think?
My daughter has SEN and is one of the youngest in her class, I worry how she’s going to be able to keep up with the pronouns and understand this without us having to teach her about gender ideology at her age. My husband is extremely against teaching her gender ideology, especially so young, I’m not the most positive about it either but don’t feel as strongly as him. He also doesn’t want her being at the school in September but they have been very supportive for her so far and I’m concerned it might not be the same elsewhere.
Thoughts? How would you feel if this was your child’s teacher?

Agrees with you about what?

You don't think that's going to prompt all manner of questions about what feeling a 'bit in the middle' is about and how people know they're 'a bit in the middle'?

Yes, the dictionary defines words as people commonly use them. Doesn’t necessarily mean that common usage has any basis in reality.

Having a 'gender identiy' is a metaphysical belief, in that it is not scientifically provable, it's a matter of faith. Like having a soul.

Sex is biological fact.

There is no sensible or meaningful reason not to call someone Mrs Jones. It is patently not sensible or meaningful to refer to a person as 'they', because everybody is either a he or she, regardless of how they say they identify or what they wear or what they do with their hair or their nails.

It’s like they’ve never met kids. Especially six year olds it’s constant whys at that age.

Just teach your child that gender is expressive and sex is biological (so I'm biologically female and my gender expression is woman- the same as my biology- but some people are biologically female with a male gender expression and vice versa, and some people have a non-binary/androgenous gender expression). It doesn't really matter. Kids just accept things like that.

I remember those days!

You're not answering the question asked.

What constitutes a male / female 'gender identity'? What are the characteristics?

Sorry, what? So are any words real, and if not, what does it matter what a person wishes to be addressed as?

Words are real yes, that’s not what I said at all. Just because there’s a word to describe something, doesn’t mean it’s really a thing. I know what you mean when you say unicorn or vampire or ghost, doesn’t mean it’s actually a meaningful thing in the world.

Mummy, what's my gender expression? What's yours?

Noah likes to play with dolls, does that make him a girl?

Can't people see how this will go?

I think this is perfect honestly

I think in a primary school age, not too much. Kids are curious but they're also quite good at reading a room. If you make it sound scandalous or intriguing or something high energy they'll run with it. But I think if you keep it calm and simple I doubt they'll be that interested.

Its us adults who get dramatic. I want my kids to know they dont always have to understand someone to be kind to them. I dont really want them being in trouble or intimidated if they struggle to understand its they/them not he/him, i want a teacher whose patient and understanding and in return i want my kids to be respectful and kind.

So id just deal with their Qns as they come, there's always awkward or embarrassing convos to be had so ill just try to he honest and simplistic

Dictionary definitions, unlike biological sex, are not immutable.

In my school dictionaries, gender was defined as an attribute of a noun in Latin and some modern languages: masculine, feminine or neuter (anticipating the asexual gender of today’s wide selection of gender identities).

How times change.

I don't agree at all. You're introducing so much ambiguity which could be destabilising at this point or possibly later on, which can cause significant effects.

Speaking from bitter experience here.

I would much prefer my child to understand that sex is what's real, but there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to be male or female.

This has strayed very far from the OP. Young children don’t need the metaphysics. They just need a good teacher

Such confusion no longer exists following the Supreme Court ruling n April. However it is important to note that the Court emphasised that everyone deserves safe spaces

And yet you are the one insisting that there is a right and wrong way to be male/female. Thats you!!! Telling other people they are wrong, liars, fantasists , unwell etc. You and others who share your intolerant ideology are doing this. No one else.

I would always say that a traumatised woman's right to a safe space trumps that of a person's feelings.

And that's exactly what I mean when I say that I acknowledge grey areas. I know it's not one size fits all.

I'm really sorry to hear about your relatives. I was a victim of CSA, too. So believe me when I say that I understand the permanent scars that come with it. I don't have any answers for how to navigate this other than to say that I don't think it's one, umbrella discussion. There are levels like there are to everything else.

Allowing a non-binary person to use they/them pronouns and call themselves Mx is not the same as demanding that biological males be allowed to share space with biological women. Lots of people want to treat these scenarios as one and the same. I do not. Ignoring the nuance means nothing gets resolved.

I have limited understanding of non-binary people. I've never met someone non-binary who has wanted to be included in women's spaces at all times. I'm not saying it hasn't happened, I've just never experienced it.

It's the underlying justification for the teacher requiring a special title/pronouns. Of course it's relevant.

Otherwise, why couldn't I just demand to be known as 'your highness' if that's what I wanted? Without justification it's just a free for all.

When you cut through the noise- these are the facts of the matter.

This is a parody. No good teacher will be having this kind of age-inappropriate conversation with OP’s child.

Those of us disposed to give them a chance have emphasised repeatedly that there is no place for ideology of any stripe in the classroom. Nor has OP indicated that this teacher is known for trying to bring it in.

That's total nonsense and you know it.

You can be a man anyway you like. You can be a woman anyway you like. Personality, clothes, jobs, hairstyles, hobbies, preferences - have no bearing on your sex.

Being in denial about what sex you are is a totally different issue and very problematic.