To be upset by PILS choice of celebration meal.

[Shardlake63]

My PILs have just celebrated a significant wedding anniversary.
As part of that celebration, they hosted dinner in a private room at a local (to them) restaurant for their extended family - about 20 of us in total.
I am definitely not a picky eater. I eat pretty much everything, except salmon (which I am allergic to - it brings me out in a very itchy rash) and lamb (which I have always hated, and even the smell makes me want to throw up). My PILs are fully aware of this.
We travelled the best part of 200 miles to attend this dinner, not to mention the cost of an overnight stay in a local hotel as relatives with spare rooms were already full with their own sons/daughters and families staying overnight.
The meal was a set dinner - no choice or alternative was offered.
First course was smoked salmon, which I could not eat due to my allergy. Fair enough, I thought I would just fill up on the main course. However, the main course turned out to be a roast lamb dinner.
Apart from the smell of it knocking me sick, I couldn't even just eat the veg as it came to the table already smothered in a lamb based gravy.😥
I ended up just eating the dessert - a slice of lemon cheesecake - which was lovely, but hardly a satisfying substitution for what should have been a 3 course dinner.
AIBU to be upset at the lack of thought and consideration here? I was quite happy to forego the starter, but most restaurants do at least offer a vegetarian alternative for the main, which I would have been more than happy with. I also eat beef, chicken, pork, turkey, duck etc. and other fish (including shellfish) - I am not a fussy eater by any stretch of the imagination, so it would not have been difficult for my in-laws to ask the restaurant to provide me with an alternative to the lamb.
As it was, I had barely any dinner and by the time the meal was finished it was too late for me to eat anywhere else.
Am I being unreasonable to think they could at least have ordered me a vegetarian alternative in the full knowledge that I wouldn't be able to eat/didn't like their choice of set meal?

OP and her DH weren't informed that it was a set menu with no choice until they arrived at the venue. They assumed, as most people would, that as the celebration was being held in a restaurant, there would be a choice of dishes on the menu.

😂

Private dining is usually a set menu. It certainly has been when we’ve done it.

It's a meal in a restaurant, not a eating a camel's anus on 'I'm a Celebrity'. It's supposed to be enjoyable. There's no way I would choke something down that I hated and that would make me retch to be polite. OP's PILs weren't polite enough to tell OP and her DH that is was a set menu with no choice or to remember OP's salmon allergy when the restaurant asked them (they remembers other guests' allergies just not OPs).

THIS
it can’t be real …. No one would do this - let alone a restaurant not try to sort it

They could have bought you a plate of lamb free vegetables .
The pil aren’t set in their ways but SELFISH

I still don’t understand how no one asked what the meal was. That is one of the first things people ask when invited to a meal, whether it is a set menu or buffet style and if it is a set menu, what is it?

I may eat a large array of things and have no allergies, but I like knowing what I’m having so I can plan accordingly and can ask questions.

I’d be put off having salmon and then lamb no matter how small the starter was and definitely with gravy all over my food. Had that at a restaurant and noticed right away that the gravy was hot and the food was lukewarm because it was busy.

Thankfully the gravy was nice but if it wasn’t, I’f be annoyed regardless if I paid for it or not and would say something.

I’m wondering if her DH knew beforehand, didn’t want to make an issue out of it and thought she could just eat the vegetables until it all came out covered in lamb gravy.

Quite few restaurants where I live do (East Midlands). Both me and DH hate gravy and think it is weird to want to eat on almost every meal which locals seem to want to do.

Ridiculous not to have options and assume 20 people like smoked salmon and lamb. I wouldn’t have eaten that either and I’m not that fussy.

Are you sure that you wouldn't have been given an alternative if you'd asked for one? Unless your in laws made a big fussy to the restaurant about how no-one should be rude enough to dislike their chosen food, I find it odd that with so many vegans and vegetarians about today, not to mention the increase in allergies and food intolerances, the place would not have any alternatives available.

She did ask, was told she’s have to sit downstairs in the main restaurant if she wanted to order from the main menu

I’m guessing becuase they didn’t realise they couldn’t choose when they got there. They weren’t told it was a set menu, just invited to dinner at a restaurant

I ordered pie and chips in a restaurant in Birmingham and it came up smothered in gravy. I hate gravy but who has gravy on chips anyway?

If someone invited you to a dinner you expe t to eat. End of.

All these people who think YABU are just wrong.

Your PIL dont care enough fir you to arrange a different meal - even main without lamb would have been ok.

Wtf. I'd be pd off too @Shardlake63

But question is what did your DH do?

A friend of mine doesn’t like lamb because it reminds her of depressing, smothering Sundays when she was a kid.
Even the smell of it winds her up.

Everyone north of the Watford Gap has gravy on chips, don’t they?

I think it is pretty common in the north of England where people seem unable to eat a meal unless it is swimming in gravy

@mydogisthebest We definitely need the laughing emoji back. 😆

Does anyone know why it was removed?

Im voting YANBU but then Im allergic to fish and hate lamb

This is starting to remind me of an Athletico Mince episode (if anyone else is a fan) and the food that Bob claims that Andy lives on. Blue drink and chicken dippers anyone?

Me and DH are Londoners and both hate gravy. We don't have it on any meals. We now live in East Midlands which is not even properly north and the gravy obsession is ridiculous. Gravy on everything including chips YUK YUK YUK.

Apart from the fact I want my food to taste of the actual food and not gravy, I also want foods that are crisp like chips, roast potatoes, yorkshire puddings to be crisp and not be made soggy with gravy. I have nothing wrong with my teeth and am capable of eating crisp foods

They can have what they want it wasn't your party

But they’re hosting, and it doesn’t affect their meal in any way if someone else eats something different. Why aren’t they, as hosts, caring about their guests ffs.

We now live in East Midlands which is not even properly north
The fact that it's the East Midland implies that it's not north at all.

OP said it was lamb gravy so she couldn’t eat it.

I live in Yorkshire, which is proper North north, and I don't even like gravy.

I am from Devon, mind.

I swear people are contrary on this site for the sake of it.

YANBU to be upset the one thing you're allergic to and the one thing you don't like were the meals you were offered.

It's customary with a set menu to check with the diners that they like everything.