New colleague staring at my cleavage- is this my fault ?

[dtarer]

I sometimes wear tops that show some cleavage. It’s hard to avoid in most tops that aren’t super high cut.

I notice men sometimes look. But today in a meeting, a man did not stop staring.

his gaze was fixed the entire time he was talking to me. It was extremely uncomfortable.

I somehow feel it’s my fault this happened. But I really love this top and I don’t think it’s obscene. I find it hard to avoid showing some cleavage, especially in summer. It just suits my shape somehow.

I’ll post a pic of the top if it will let me.

it was 38 degrees today theyre lucky i wasnt in a bikini

That escalated quickly.

I used to work with someone who stared at my breasts all the time and I was about 32B then and wore men's shirts. What should I do, bind them? Wear a burka? Or you know, point out that he is totally out of order.

You look amazing, but I’m not sure if it’s an appropriate outfit for work.

topless men in your office? It would be challenging not to stare if Steve from Accounts showed up to a meeting without his shirt on.

It is a beautiful, flattering top. But not appropriate for work. No matter how casual people are dressed at your work. It’s too deep cut and the styling pulls all the attention to the cleavage. This is a top for going out.

I agree with this. He should not stare. But also I wouldn't wear that to work myself. But I'm old, so different times probably.

Stick 2 large toy eyes on your chest and tell him that seems to be the only way to get him to look you in the eye!

The black top is awful. What's "flattering" about it? Presumably the point of wearing something like that is to show off your breasts? Is there a permitted length of time for anyone looking at them to look at them?

Did you not ask him outright why he was staring at your tits?

He absolutely shouldn't have been staring but I don't think that too is appropriate for work though tbh.

Yes. IMO you should have a vest/camisole underneath that, it’s too low cut.

obviously your colleague shouldn’t be staring, but that’s inappropriate dress IMO

It's one thing to have a quick look if someone has cleavage but sounds like he was OTT.

There are two issues here:

• of course colleagues should not be staring at your body

• but there is also the fact that tops that show cleavage are not appropriate for work environment, regardless of whether people stare at you or not.

If that's not you in the photo we can't comment on how it looks on you or how much cleavage you showed

But why wear a top like that if you DON'T want people admiring your chest. Bizarre post. Flash cleavage and bust with a low cut top of course people will look lol, it screams "look at me, look at me" lol

I'd probably struggle not to stare if a man was wearing a top like that with a v-cut nearly down to his navel at work. I wouldn't want to see that much of him or that much of anyone.

I am large chested so I feel your pain when it comes to finding summery tops that don't show cleavage.

However, I wouldn't consider that too suitable for work without a cropped cami underneath. That is designed to show cleavage rather than having some visible because of the size of your chest being larger than average.

Honestly no it's more a going out for the night top .it's nice with a nice cut but not for work just wear a cami underneath for work and it's sorted

He could be into small boobs and thought they were too huge and top was inappropriate for work.

Not everyone looking is lusting over them. Female posters have said on here they'd stare too as it's in your face.

It's human nature to look, rude to stare of course.
Same as a man in short shorts or a deep V shirt with chest hair showing.
I'd probably stare, but not because I thought he was gorgeous.

Like all the times this has been said on this thread, this is a ludicrous comment.

This is not an appropriate outfit for some work roles and is perfectly appropriate for others.

The OP says this is fine at her work. Different workplaces have different expectations.

Maybe the guy could just not stare at her cleavage.

You don't mind people looking but he looked for too long?
Maybe he takes longer to process things or zoned out as some have mentioned on here.

Off topic but that topic looks like Boohoo or Dorothy Perkins polyester fast fashion. Not sure why you love it so much.

Have you ever looked at a man? Men’s nipples do stick out through their shirts or tops.