Asking if you took a Ukrainian guest in your home why you want them gone asap?

[Anhelina2000xx]

My experience as Ukrainian coming to UK. Many people want the Ukrainian guest for them house but when we are there straight away want you to leave asap and getting the job asap even if it is the very bad job.
This is my experience and the experience of very many Ukrainian people I speak to. Why? Why does the English agree to have Ukrainians for them house but plan to make them leave asap? In my first home in UK she want me to get the job after 1 week! 1 week not very many time to even relax and try to speak my family from Ukraine! My brothers was forced in war just one day he go and buy the food at the shop!
Was they told the Ukrainian is only staying for a week or something like this? Or when you live with Ukrainian you start to hate them so you say please get a job right now please find a new place? And this is not only me, this is very many Ukrainians. Told to come them to this home. Then told please to leave asap!
Why?

At the start of the invasion, there were rocket attacks all over the country, not just the East. Our guests were from (safe) central Ukraine and they were heavily targeted at the start because their air force is based in that city. They fled and they’ve never returned to Ukraine since, even though they are missing their family terribly. Mum is just too scared to put the children in danger again.

Our guests (Mum, and son now 14, and daughter now 9) all have PTSD. One particular event I’ll never forget was being out with daughter who was about 7 at the time. Some fireworks unexpectedly went off and she screamed and dropped to the floor in a ball, violently shaking. She had wet herself. This is the most beautiful, happy, outgoing little girl. To look at her, you would never guess that she was holding that trauma, but it cuts very deep.

Since then, their city has only suffered one heavy bombing raid. Even ‘safe’ places like Lviv suffer sporadic attacks, even though they’re not occupied like the East. There are daily drone attacks on Kyiv and people are killed. People consider Kyiv to be safe.

Nowhere is completely safe. Some people think the risks are worth going back for, others don’t. I guess it depends on how anxious a person you are. I certainly wouldn’t take my children there.

Ha ha - sometimes I think that about my ex-husband!

I hope you manage to get rid of him soon.

Absolutely. My friend’s Mum got caught in an air attack in Lviv on her way over here from central Ukraine.

A lot of people did indeed have them for longer, but the families we know who signed up were strongly under the impression it was long enough to set up the new arrivals, estimated at a maximum six months. There was then an offer to extend the government payment for longer.

I don’t see how it’s goady or inflammatory, it’s quite an interesting conversation. Certainly not frothing.

Saying “wisen up” doesn’t make you sound as cool or street-wise, just a little bit sad.

Wisen up is a really common expression where I live lol. But maybe I just live in a city full of saddos.

Of course the OP was goady - you need to be really naive not to see that. And OP hasn’t returned which is typical goady poster behaviour.

People got caught up in the spirit/novelty of it and then realised the reality was very different.

No privacy in your own home can wear thin fast, especially when your personalities might not gel.

Unfortunately I knew this would be the case from the get go. Especially these people that did it just so they looked generous for social media.

I ran an informal support group in our area for families who took in Ukranians. I would say the success rate was 50/50 and it was more likely to be successful with an older retired
couple with space who took in a mother and child. The intentions of most people who
sogned up to host were honourable and break down of placements was not solely due to the host in most instances. The Govt put together a quick scheme and some aspects worked some
didnt
our family made comment recently of lots of Ukranians not working and relying on benefits when they should be and also that financially it about the same if they worked or stayed on benefits. I don’t have knowledge enough
to know if it is fair comment
I only found out how
much impact it had on my own kids after - they never said a word until they moved out at which point they all said how hard it was,
how pleased they were it was
over but how glad they were we had done it

Our Ukrainian colleagues flying back and forth regularly for a variety of reasons- holidays, dental treatments etc.

I'm relaxed about Ukrainians returning home for medical treatment etc. Although I think this website is on the optimistic side.
https://visitukraine.today/blog/4809/travel-to-ukraine-2025-how-to-come-to-ukraine-as-a-tourist-rules-and-safe-cities#what-countries-can-i-enter-ukraine-from-without-a-visa

That said, it hi-lights the way that white, European, Ukrainian asylum seekers/refugees are treated differently to their black or brown fellow asylum seekers/refugees: if an Afghan or Eritrean returned home even to see a dying relative whilst their claim for asylum was being processed it would mean an automatic denial of claim.

And I've been to Lviv and would go again when it's safe, it's a wonderful, fascinating place.

Yes, I agree.

Why did you feel you needed time to relax? You had the privilege of a safe roof over your head away from war, why not want to pay for your own expenses to help the family who were protecting your life? It's not a holiday after all.

I would guess that was a wrong choice of word from someone who is clearly not completely fluent in English. I took it to mean “recover”. I know the journey alone was extremely stressful for my Ukrainian guest and she won’t have been alone in that. If OP’s host was trying to make her get a job within a week of arrival that wasn’t particularly empathetic, nor was it needed. Those of us who provided accommodation were given an allowance as a thank you.

You don’t begin to understand the issue. And btw, “having a roof over your head” is not a privilege, it’s a basic human need.