To think “non-binary” is becoming a fashion statement for some people rather than a true identity?

[ByPoliteExpert]

Not saying it’s not real but the aestheticisation of it is creeping in.

Get your badge in the post, you are cis non-binary, don't let those Bowie looking interlopers get in on the act.

Their internal sense of self doesn’t sit comfortably with the labels or expectations of “man” or “woman.” That’s where gender identify becomes more consciously felt - not as a performance but as something that doesn’t quite fit what society has mapped out

but in the old days we didn’t sit and get in a twist about it - we just did ‘us’ - why the sudden need to be all introspective and anxious

Just be who you are why worry that you need to conform just because of your sex

I’ve have been all my life - do I get a badge?

most of the people I know who say they are non binary also have bad mental health issues of some sort
And they all seem to have a cause of some sort that they will let you know about as soon as you chat to them

it can sound confusing
No shit Sherlock.
If someone isn't happy with their 'internal self' enough to decide that they are of no sex , then they need to seek help to find out why they're unhappy (and I bet it's nothing to do with being male or female)

So to be NB, you basically just have to change your pronouns to 'they'. Is there any other criteria, because I'm still confused. It just seems to be about reinforcing regressive stereotypes. If you don't fit into completely feminine or completely masculine, but are a mix of the 2, then you must be NB 🤷🏼‍♀️

I think the other problem OP is people conflating sex and gender identity

but if being non binary is about your biological sex how can it not be part of it

also how does the term non binary fit in with the rest of the movement as it defines two sexes in its very name!

Being non-binary is about gender identity - how someone internally understands and experiences their own gender.

For this to mean anything, we'd need to have a common understanding of what "gender" means.

So what does "gender" mean in this context?

@ByPoliteExpert you're very preachy. How about accepting that maybe, just maybe, you aren't an expert at all? Also, your first post was a false flag, which is straight up bad manners.

Yes - gender identity is ultimately about how someone internally relates to gender. So in that sense, yes, people are non-binary because that’s how they understand themselves. It’s not about meeting a checklist of traits or behaviours; it’s about that internal sense of self.

And you’re right - if someone felt non-binary but changed nothing about how they dress or act, they could still identify that way. That’s because gender identity is separate from gender expression. Not all non-binary people present in visibly “neutral” or “androgynous” ways.

As for your last question - if gender is socially constructed (which many agree it is), then knowing your gender is like knowing where you feel you fit, or don’t, within those social frameworks. Some people feel at home in the category they were assigned at birth. Others don’t. It’s less about objective measurement and more about internal alignment, which can shift or become clearer over time.

What do you call people who have no gender identity because beyond the sex
descriptors of male or female they don't believe there's anything further to differentiate between humans in that respect. Or what do they call themselves?

My friend’s daughter is NB

has a boyfriend
went to prom in a beautiful frock
uses her female name

but has short hair - ergo not feminine so must be non conforming

I had a buzz cut in the 80’s - was and still am a woman

if gender is socially constructed (which many agree it is

Do you agree that it is, OP?

Being non-binary is about gender identity - how someone internally understands and experiences their own gender. For some people, that identity doesn’t sit fully with “woman” or “man”, even if they’re comfortable with their body or how they present.

I get what you're trying to say here OP. But to be honest I think I have a problem with the whole idea of "identity" in itself. What if I don't "identify" with being an adult, or being human, even though I am those things? I guess I can identify however I like inside my own head. But if I decide normal societal rules don't apply to me because I "identify" as a teenage dragon, not an adult woman, that's going to cause problems.

I know this sounds silly but really it's no sillier than identifying as having no sex (or the opposite sex) even though I am actually female.

Busy grown ups.

Some people feel at home in the category they were assigned at birth.

No one is assigned a gender at birth. They're assigned a sex based on observation.

Gender is something completely different.

You’re of course entitled to think the concept of gender identity isn’t meaningful but it’s also okay that others experience it differently. My post wasn’t about policing who can or can’t identify as non-binary. It was about reflecting on the visible cultural shifts around the label, especially when identity starts to feel more like an aesthetic or trend.

I agree we can’t know what others feel internally but we can notice how certain expressions get amplified, commodified or adopted in ways that affect public perception. That doesn’t invalidate sincere experiences.

Every one has a sex it’s not assigned it’s biology

Gender refers to the regressive stereotypes created to control both sexes

you can reject these stereotypes without needing to redefine you entire being

no label needed

I believe they would actually call you agenda (the gender identity of not having a gender)

I mean the deep, personal sense someone has about whether they feel like a man, a woman, both, neither or something else entirely - regardless of how they look or behave outwardly. It’s not always something people can put into perfect words. For some, their gender identify lines up easily with their sex at birth. For others, it doesn’t and they may describe themselves as non-binary, trans, or use another term that better fits how they feel at their core. It’s less about stereotypes and hobbies and more about how someone recognises and names that internal sense of self.

But according to your OP, people who are choosing to change their appearance and call themselves non-binary are doing so as a fashion statement rather than a true identity. How can you know? If there is no single thing that non-binary people have in common other than their inner feelings, how do you know whether its a 'true identity' or not?

Mine's called Dave.

And Sam Smith.

So basically if you don’t conform to a set of outdated sexist stereotypes you’re non binary. Awesome. I’m non binary. Now what?

Dye your hair a primary colour and start telling everyone of course. And be ready to start feeling offended for no particular reason at all.

I have seen videos of teenagers and young people declaring that it a chose for them. That they have chosen this because they otherwise they would be seen as ‘just like everyone else.’

I see many extreme transgender activists though who when they tell us what gender is and why a male person can be a girl or a woman, they seem to forget non-binary people, gender fluid and all the other 140+ genders.