To not want to eat Chinese - help me to see if I’m being unreasonable

[Watermoves]

My partners favourite take away is Chinese. I’m not keen, I’m vegetarian (raised this way) and just find its bland and boring. I have eaten Chinese but I don’t really like it.

Therefore we often have Indian, Mexican, pizza etc if we have a takeaway all of which he also really likes. I often offer to get him a Chinese or suggest he gets one if I’m working late etc but he always says no.

it come to a head tonight as he wanted a Chinese take away and I didn’t fancy it but suggested I would get something else. He said it’s not the same eating a takeaway alone. I kinda get that, but I would have got myself an Indian. (We would be eating at the table together just different food)

He basically said I should suck it up and eat the Chinese food every so often for him? My rationale is that I shouldn’t have to eat what I don’t want or like?

who is being unreasonable?

I always get an omelette from the chinese when DH orders, I'm not a huge fan of chinese food, we don't order chinese very often, I would prefer an indian or a pizza. But when he fancies and indian and I want pizza/kebab, we just order separate

You just need to find better Chinese takeaways. I'm vegan and Chinese is my favorite takeout. However I had many bland, greasy awful takeouts until I found good places.

Definitely don't eat it just because he likes it. I don't eat meat and definitely can't get excited about a Chinese takeaway.

So not only do you have to have a takeaway you dislike, you have have to get ‘excited’ about it? F that.

Are you aware that being able to cook, and enjoying occasional takeaways are not mutually exclusive ;-) ?

I don’t really like Indian food but sometimes we get that if everyone else wants it just because it’s easier to order one takeaway and it’s nice to all eat the same thing.

I didn’t mean to elicit such a strong reaction!

He wants you to be "excited" to have a Chinese takeaway....?

I don't even know what to say about this. It's nuts.

Your husband sounds like a knob.

I can't believe this is a genuine issue in your relationship.

I love pizza (especially the proper wood fired ones!) and my DH doesn't. I can't say it has once caused any problem at all in all the time we've been together.

Does anyone else really fancy a chinese now or just me

I don't understand why it matters to him if you get yourself a different takeaway. My DH doesn't like Chinese food much either and he'd happily have something else if I fancied one. We're still both having a takeaway together

For the OP it clearly is. You can scroll on by if you’re not interested 🙄

She’s vegetarian.

I think you're both being unreasonable.

Your reasonable solution of just getting different takeaway foods is rejected. But his reasonable solution of you just sucking it up every now and then is rejected too.

Also - the whole of Chinese cuisine is bland and boring? But pizza isn't? Pizza is literally one type of food with different toppings. Chinese you have rice, noodles, Hong Kong style, sweet and sour etc etc, a whole world.

And how can a billion Chinese people be wrong?

See there are so many different dishes with so many different flavours that I just can’t see how you can say that? Maybe you’re just trying the wrong things? I can think of loads of Chinese dishes that don’t taste like dish water.

I realise this is brand new information, but the OP is vegetarian.

(Which also means the 'but sharing dishes is important to the experience' argument doesn't hold up. He will undoubtedly want to share hers, but then get himself a pile of things she can't eat.)

And as for @NJLX2021 's suggestion of just going to China and trying their 63 regional cuisines to find one you like.... yes, that helps.🙄

Edit - the first part was quoting the PP who suggested Singapore noodles as a not-bland option. Not sure why the quote vanished. But the edit allows me to add that this also applies to the PP who suggested crab Rangoon.

There's a lot of meat on that menu. What's there for vegetarians?

OP - you should eat what you don't like especially when you are paying a lot of money for it.

Edit - oops thread is 3 pages in. Ignore me if already answered.

And all these tasty options are available from the OP's local takeaway, are they?

You didn’t even read what OP put did you lol she’s vegetarian so hardly likely to order chicken 😂

I would just get separate takeaways or eat something different on the night he wants Chinese food.

Have to say though I absolutely love deep fried bean curd and other vegetable and mushroom dishes on a good Chinese takeaway menu, even though I do eat meat and fish.

DH hates eggs and mushrooms. I don't make him eat mushroom omelette but I certainly eat it myself!

He’s being a knob. You are not stopping him having Chinese or forcing him to eat anything he doesn’t like. He OTOH is trying to force you to eat food you don’t like.

For all the posters telling the OP to “just” order <insert veggie dish here> - not all Chinese restaurants are the same. I’m veggie and have often struggled to get decent veggie food in Chinese restaurants, especially in cheaper places with premade gloopy sauces. At others the choice is amazing with everything fresh and made in house.
I find in city centres it tends to be better but overall I find the quality of Chinese takeaways is much more variable than many other cuisines.

More likely she just has a rubbish Chinese takeaway in which case they are both better off going elsewhere.

Exactly.

And what omnivores won't realsed is that a lot of things that appear vegetarian actually aren't (pork fat, oyster sauce, dried shrimp etc as unlisted additions), so the choice is always less than is seems from the menu.

I've just thad a look at a local Chinese takaway's menu and the total 'definitely vegetarian' choices are mixed veg in 5 different sauces, and the veg spring rolls. There are 2 chow meins and a foo yung that look veggie but I'd need to check ingredients.

That's it. Five variations on 1 thing, 2 variations on another, and a mushroom omelette.

Such choice!

I guess you’re not in London, here there are vegan and vegetarian Chinese restaurants.

Yes, I'm perfectly aware that large cities have more choices. I used to live near a fantastic vegan Chinese in Camden.

A lot of people do not live in large cities. Almost half don't live in any sort of city. The many PP saying 'just try a different regional style', 'get the claypot aubergine' are apparently not aware of this.