My neighbours have disappeared

[poppetandmog]

This is really none of my business but it’s such an odd situation, I had to share. My garden backs on to two other houses. We don’t know these neighbours - they technically live around the corner from us on a different street but because of the way the houses are positioned and with our house being slightly elevated, we can see in to their gardens and to a lesser degree, in to their houses. One of the neighbours has 3 small boys (I’d guess ages 5-10) and we would often see them playing football all in the garden. We’d also see them coming and going to school/work etc as they tended to use their back door.

it suddenly occurred to me the other day that I hadn’t seen them in months. No cars on the driveway either. Being nosey, I checked to see if the house was for sale, thinking they’d moved somewhere else but it isn’t. I’m now kind of worried as it’s just really odd for a family to disappear, but as we don’t actually know them, i could be totally wrong. Should I report this to someone to check they’re okay? There’s probably a logical explanation but if something has happened to them, I’d feel terrible noticing and doing nothing. Thoughts?

I’d go to the people who live next to them and knock the door and explain. Maybe they know something .

I once called the police expressing concern for my ex. He lived on a main road near me, and I realised he'd left the living room light on for a few days. I knocked on the door once because I felt I ought to, but there was no answer. The police phoned me back a day or two later to say that they'd made contact with him and he was fine. I think I did the right thing.

That dosen't mean it is definitely owned by them. Plenty of new builds are bought by landlords to rent out.

I had neighbours that did a runner overnight. They had kids and pets and no one in the street even knew their home was rented but it turned out they were far behind on payments. When the owners got the house back it ended up being fixed up and sold because they were so upset over them running away and the condition they left it in.

How would you know for definite they owned their house and weren't renting? The most logical solution is that they were renting and either served notice, or just decided to move .

If I’d gone away of my own volition I’d be really pissed off if the police called to do a ‘welfare check’ and broke my door down. You don’t know the family so yes, I would not get involved.

Some tenants tell the neighbours they’ve bought the property so unless the neighbours know the landlord/owners neighbours may not know the true facts.

They may have moved house with the plans to rent it out, but they haven't done so yet.

Loads of possibilities. I can't see any reason to get involved though. A family of that size would flag up many, many times with schools/work etc if they really had "disappeared".

They probabaly got fed up of the nosy neighbour who keeps peering into their house

This is more worrying than OP’s case. I would Check up on her sooner rather than later.

Can I just remind people that those few, tragic cases in the past where entire families have laid deceased in their homes for long periods of time, have all had neighbours later say that they’d noticed them missing but decided to “stay out of it” 😔

Why don't you ask their next-door neighbors? Or mail a note, which might be forwarded to any current address?

Exactly this 👆. Perhaps if more people paid attention of what was going on around them there’d be more social connection.
Too many folk are walking through life in a fug of oblivion minding their own business.
Perhaps that’s why there’s so much loneliness.

For your peace of mind OP, I’d speak to their immediate neighbour explaining you’ve been worried by their disappearance.

if it’s an elderly neighbour on their own and you haven’t seen them it’s very different - I wouldn’t hesitate for a second and just go straight over to check.

When our eldest two DC were 5 and 3 we took them travelling for 10 weeks as we couldn’t envisage another time when we would have that much time off (DH took a month unpaid on top of his generous 7 week summer holidays and I was in a 6 month mandatory gardening leave/notice before I could contractually work for a competitor. I’m sure anyone who didn’t know us well might have wondered where we had vanished to and I would have rather they asked neighbours than worry.

Can you take a random ball with you and go knock on their door to 'return' it? Then if there's no answer, go to the next door neighbour and ask after them.
Could be a simple explanation, but if you're worried....

You're clearly not nosey enough @poppetandmog , first things first ask their next door neighbours. It doesn't matter if you don't know them, just knock on the door and ask - they'll never know where you've come from (maybe). If in doubt ask for their Kleeneeze catalogue and tell them the neighbours still owe you the March
edition back.

They might say that they were wondering the same. The plot may thicken.

Genius!

I would thnk neighbours either side of these people would know where they have gone, you only back on to them and don't know them well. When I lived in my house (I've downsized to.a flat), I had no idea who the people I backed on to were and doubt they knew anything about me, nor be interested. However I knew my neighbours either side. That's normal.

The truth is out there.

cannotbetooarsed

I would probably go and ask a neighbour. I think it’s refreshing to read that someone actually cares about other peoples wellbeing.

Same thought here. If you can’t ask a neighbour, I’d knock with a fake problem, saw a cat wandering about and saw it go into their garden wonder whose it is etc etc. They could all be there and yu just missed them, they were playing inside/ away etc etc but good to have people check

House opposite us was the same. They did a moonlight flit (literally in the middle of the night apparently) because they owed so much rent. I feel bad because there were children.

Is the house empty? If it's not I would maybe strike up a conversation with a neighbour, ask if they know if they are renting out the property as you have a 'friend' interested. Or just speak to the police and the can do a welfare check.

All new build estates have to have a percentage of housing association properties so the chances are they’ve just moved

I would knock on the neighbours first and ask, depending on their response then maybe contact police to do a welfare check. You are concerned and it’s ok to feel that.

What’s the worst that could happen, you get called nosey? I’d rather be called nosey then be one of the many folk you hear about in the news that ‘thought something was wrong’ but did nothing about it.

I think you are doing the right thing.