Was I unreasonable to say no?

[Thefourth]

Christmas allocation was sent out last week. We have to have it so early because we need to plan the out reach around it. For first time in 5 years I have Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Boxing Day & NYD off. Im Working nye. We’re going to go away. We dont have children but that’s because I’m infertile it’s not because we don’t want them.

Usually I pick up extra but this year I thought fuck it, no I want to have it all off. So I requested it off and in the comments I pointed out I have covered their Christmas shifts & done my own for 5 years.

I have been massively guilty of tripped by 3 colleagues who have said I must pick up their Christmas shifts because they have children and I don’t. One of them said that I was deceitful by not telling them I wanted it all off because as she assumed I would cover it all she hadn’t asked for any of it off.

Another one has gone to our manager and demanded that he make me work it and give them my days off. He asked me to consider taking some of their shifts and I said if he asks me again I will quit.

For the last 5 years I have had off the 29th-30th December and then take my ‘Christmas leave’ in January.

Their children are 11,5,9,15,18 & 21 respectively if it changes anyone’s opinion.

the atmosphere is awful

This really pisses me off. There’s selfish twats. Just keep saying no OP.

But definitely not before Christmas

yes interactions like this don’t get really just come out of the blue

there’s a history

Wow I’m so happy for you op especially standing up to your manager.
I do think the management plays into this…no one should have every holiday or even the exact same vacation every year in a workplace that works holidays.
I had a colleague married to a minister…wanted every Xmas eve and Xmas day off to attend “his” religious services. No..he’s always going to be a minister plan accordingly.

Another was 63 y.o woman with grown children no grands didn’t put up a tree or exchange gifts or eat at home but rather a restaurant. Every year she freely spoke about no tree no gifts no cooking no hosting and yet requested Every Xmas week off for years as she was the most senior employee.

I changed all that when I started managing everyones paid time off.

of course they are mad at themselves because they took you for granted. This is the way forward no more taking the heavy load as they have shown how very little appreciation they have for you working holidays

Read the room! Why on earth is it her responsibility to tell people she won’t be doing that is in any event entirely optional

They are completely selfish CFs so you must stick to your guns on this one!

Another one has gone to our manager and demanded that he make me work it and give them my days off. He asked me to consider taking some of their shifts and I said if he asks me again I will quit.

I know there's a lot going on today, but am I the only person who read this and thought "constructive dismissal" ?

You’re entitled to have Christmas off as well as those with kids!

Well whoop dee doo for you. Not sure how your comment helps the OP though.

OP, talk to your manager. Their behavior is unacceptable and needs to be nipped in the bud by them.

I have kids but don't work shifts. I would think its fair that you get your holiday allocation as you requested and as its planned and can have some time off yourself this christmas if you have forgone your previous years then you have done your bit. They can also change jobs if they dont like it they went for a job that has shifts over christmas, so they have to deal with that.

Your work needs to be more strict and not allow the swaps. It's their policy that has caused this.
I used to work Xmas eve and day every year. Boxing day, new years eve or day too, depending on whether it fell on a Sunday. I knew going into church musicianship that would be the case.
Offspring now works on an intensive care ward. They get told their shifts over the festive period. No swaps allowed. If you're rota'd to work, you work. Everyone grumbles and then make the best of it.

You need to tell the entitled arses to piss right off! I have to work some of Xmas / new year. I have kids. I would NEVER expect someone without kids to cover my shifts just because they don’t have any children. Insane. Enjoy some well deserved time off!!! And look for a job with kinder people 💕

Stick to your guns op. You’re well within your rights to have the time off, you have as much right as anyone else. Your manager is being a dick by pressurising you into working some of the shifts, he should have your back

@Thefourth For first time in 5 years I have Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Boxing Day & NYD off. Im Working nye.

Christmas eve and New Year's eve are normal working days that are not different or special from any other day.

I have been massively guilty of tripped by 3 colleagues who have said I must pick up their Christmas shifts because they have children and I don’t.

Tell them to fuck off.

Contrary to the beliefs of parents:

• The lives of children are not inherently more valuable than the lives of grown adults.
• Parents are not (and should not) be entitled to special benefits and privileges that are not afforded to people without children.

Bloody hell. YANBU.

Where is the gratitude for covering their Christmas for the last five years?

If they don't have an attitude adjustment pretty speedily I would make a complaint OP. Entitled bullies.

If you’re still there come Christmas you need a cast iron alibi ready for being unavailable to cover them all ringing in sick.

Imagine sitting crying over Christmas 6 months before in June 🤣

Diddums they knew what they were signing up for when they got the job . They chose to have kids . And said kids won’t melt like a snowman just coz their Mum won’t be there on Christmas morning to see them open their presents … many children will be losing their parents this year and would love to be able to celebrate Xmas with them even if it was the day before or day after … they need to see there’s more important things going on in the world than having to work Xmas day !

You have done your bit more than once. You are entitled to time off too.

In your place, OP, I'd be very attempted to tell them to GTF.

I'm also childless - not through choice. Try telling them to check their privilege.

ETA Sorry - didn't mean to quote.

How cheeky for someone to assume you will cover those shifts! Their childcare responsibilities are not your problem!

The age of the children is irrelevant! What if you wanted to visit elderly parents at Christmas?

Hopefully it’ll be a five day wonder and they’ll move on.

Enjoy your holiday!

and they gave six months to sort themselves out!

Your colleagues are being ridiculous, but you know that already. Simply say you'd made tentative plans to go away this year and since your time off was approved you've now made final plans that cannot be altered. The person who said she didn't request time off because she thought you'd cover whatever time she didn't ask for is either completely incapable of following basic directions (in which case your employer probably should be making special accommodations for her) or lying to guilt-trip you. Have a great holiday!

Those types of people wouldn't ever cover you for 5 minutes but expect it from you. Typical CFs.

We dont have children but that’s because I’m infertile it’s not because we don’t want them.

completely irrelevant, you don't have to justify yourself.

Don't feel guilty, you deserve Christmas as much as anyone else. No child's Christmas is ever going to be ruined because a parent is working at some point, they are just being selfish idiots. If they want to cancel Christmas because they're sulking, it's their loss.

They choose to work in a job where they might have to work over Christmas. for 5 years, they have been lucky. This year they are not.

I can see how they feel, but you are just as entitled to a Christmas break as they are.

It sounds like they will make your life hell now though, but keep a record of any harassment or bullying from them and report it to HR.

Neither management or your colleagues can force you to change, but obviously the working environment will not be very nice for you.

No you are not being unreasonable. Stick to your guns and enjoy a well deserved Christmas off!

They are acting vile, entitled and selfish. You are completely reasonable to say no, you are also deserve Christmas. Stand firm and enjoy your time off OP.