Piss taking neighbour

[Violetraindrops]

Moved to a nice (ish) area a few months ago, knew when I saw the new neighbour that he was a prick. Unreal how entitled the people down this street are tbh. My family and I are not stuck up yet we’re not the pits or in the nightmare neighbour bracket but it’s clear the neighbours look down on us as we do not follow the typical religion and culture that most of the street share.
So this twat hardly even says hello yet he stood at our garden fence watching as we were going to trim our hedges with our new hedge trimmer the other day and asked my partner if he would come and trim the hedge in his garden as it is our hedge that has grown over to his side. (I didn’t realise my partner hadn’t offered to do it himself and that this neighbour actually thinks it is our responsibility to do so and expects us to sort it as if it is our responsibility).
Fast forward to yesterday, a delivery guy attempts to deliver a package to this neighbour, rings his ring doorbell, I was in my garden at this point and heard loud and clear the neighbour say through the speaker that he was not home and to not leave the parcel with me but to take it to the other neighbours!
So he expects my partner to go and do his gardening yet we’re not good enough to take his parcel in? I could hear the disgust in his voice at the idea of the delivery man leaving his parcel with us.
He also stores his massive ladders in our garage because they won’t fit in his. Honestly I felt like launching his ladders over the fence for him to store where the sun doesn’t shine.
I could understand if we were scum bags and caused nuisance but we’re in bed by a reasonable time and do not make excessive noise or other anti social issues.
I realise I shouldn’t give it a second thought yet after hearing his tone about us to the driver I feel enraged at his cheek.

I wouldn’t be upset by the parcel thing- I say the same but don’t have bad feelings towards my neighbours but I have a neighbour who is fine with taking my parcels and they have verbally ok’d it. I would feel a bit of piss taker if my other neighbour started being pestered with them without a conversation !

Ugh there’s nothing like bad neighbours to rile you up! Feel glad he is not asking you to take his parcels in too. He’d probably expect you to pop them over at his convenience.

Are you 100% sure he wasnt saying not to leave it with you as a favour? My neighbour specifically asks for parcels not to go to our house because we had a spate for a few weeks and I kept popping them over to her and she went "god this is such a pain for you, I'm going to add a note so they go to someone else's house".
I appreciate you heard the tone, but equally you do sound maybe a little quick to assume.... it sounds more to me like you've done him a few favours so he's saving you the bother of looking after a parcel that isn't yours. He obviously doesn't think you're going to rob him because he's got stuff in your garage!

It could be that prick and the other neighbour always take in each others' parcels, or are good friends or something. Maybe he was being rude about you, maybe he was simply speaking dismissively to the delivery person who a prick is bound to view as beneath him.

Personally, I would have trimmed the hedge on his side because it is your hedge and it is a neighbourly thing to do.

I wouldn't drop the ladders off because it will look really petty. Who cares what prick thinks, but he is not the only neighbour.

I'd bide my time and see how things develop with other neighbours, keep your tinder dry for now.

Four issues here:

1. Trimming the hedge. Was a bit cheeky of him to ask but "sorry, don't have time but you're welcome to trim whatever is on your side," as a previous poster has suggested, is all you needed to say.
2. Parcel. It was actually much more polite of your neighbour to suggest someone else, who he has probably previously checked with if they mind taking parcels in.
3. Ladders. Surely this doesn't happen without any sort of previous conversation?!?
4. You immediately deciding that he is "a prick" and mentioning the "usual religion and culture" of your neighbours.

Keep the ladders, you bought the property and the previous owners did not inform you that anything remaining in the property was owned by neighbours.

Parcel - I'd be glad of not having the burden on deliveries for neighbours being brought to yours! I regularly got this when I moved here and with a newborn baby, it was a pain in the ass. I stopped taking them in after being woken up several times, then tripping over them for days until they bothered to come get them.

Neighbour can cut the side of the hedge on their property themselves.

Check that there are no nesting birds before trimming a hedge March - September, you cannot legally trim it IF there are nesting birds in it.

ooo there's a whole lot of judgy mc judgeface here
ladders, hand them back with a smile "sorry you can't be responsible for their safekeeping"
Actually I don't use ladders myself and don't own any because they are a helping hand to anybody who wants to break in...I'd definitely not want to store ladders for someone else.
hedge "sorry I can't do that but please to feel free to trim your side yourself"
religion. WT actual F, I have no idea what religion my neighbours are.
parcels, I'd be glad not to be responsible for that.

are you sure you are not reading too much into his 'tone'.

He may have an agreement with the neighbours the other side that they are happy to take his parcels. If he didn't think you would appreciate having parcels delivered for him he would emphasise the fact that they weren't to take them to you.. it doesn't mean he thinks you aren't trustworthy or scum etc.

By all means give his ladders back though, the twatty hedge thing alone would have been the end of that agreement for me.

Agree, if they really are his ladders I would not be storing them. Does he have a key to your garage. He might have copied on in the past. I would consider changing the lock.

You're being ridiculous.

If your hedge is growing into his garden then it is your responsibility to trim it so it doesn't encroach on his space. Why would he buy his own hedge trimmer because you have a hedge? It takes a few minutes, it's hardly a big job.

It's incredible that you are able to read his mind including his entire attitude to you by eavesdropping on his "tone" on a ring doorbell conversation! The idea that maybe he knows the other neighbours and has noticed that you inexplicably hate him didn't occur to you?

If you don't want to store his ladders that's fair enough, it's an agreement he had with the previous owners who obviously did not take an instant dislike to him. Why you are so determined to make a war with next door is beyond me.

no its actually not the hedge owners responsibility. They can trim it or they can leave it to the neighbour to do.

I'm not talking about legally, I'm saying morally, if you have a hedge, you should make sure it stays on your side, not expect the neighbours to have to constantly maintain it.

oh morally.... So sorry i didn't realise we had two judgy McJ's on here

Unless its his tone I don't actually see much he has done wrong

Your hedge has overgrown onto his property and he asked you to trim it. Its my hedge and he's given permission to trim from his side, of course Id trim it.

And I thought you were going to complain that he was making you take parcels but he directed the parcel somewhere else so again sont really see the issue, saves you the hassle

If ladders are annoying you guve them back.

This is kind of confusing...the neighbour was in his house and told the delivery driver that he wasn't in?
Taking parcels in for neighbours is a total pain in the neck (according to Mumsnetters) so you probably dodged a bullet there.
Tell him you can't store his ladders anymore, put them back on his driveway, and then be done with him.

You made up your mind to dislike him before you even spoke to him. I doubt he could ever do anything right for you.

Goodness I’d be delighted if I never got a package for my neighbours! Maybe he has a reciprocal agreement with his other neighbours anyway?
As for the hedge trimming I think it would have been neighbourly to knock on his door and say you are trimming the hedge would he like his side done too - I think it’s extremely petty when I see a neat line down the middle of a hedge with one side trimmed and the other not (like when people with a three feet grass verge between them and their neighbours but only mow 18 inches on their side).
If this is the ‘worst’ of his behaviour (only saying ‘hello’, asking if DH could trim the hedge as DH already had the trimmer out, asking that a package not be delivered to you - surely could be taken as being considerate)? I don’t understand you. He may be a quiet guy who likes to keep himself to himself - you are the one who has decided it’s because he looks down at you for not being of the religion of the area. He’s asked if you were ok with continuing storing his ladders - he asked, I assume you said yes, what’s the issue? It seems you have made way more assumptions about him than he has about you.

How do you know what race the OP is??? How on earth can she be racist? A twat is a twat no matter what race they are

a neighbours hedge would annoy me, I don’t want a hedge myself, why should I have to buy tools (I'm assuming OP wouldn’t let them use theirs) to cut a hedge I didn’t want

Re parcel. Maybe he's got longstanding agreement with someone else and didn’t want them to disturb you?

both my neighbours have notes on their doors saying deliver to any neighbour but not me. I WFH but am on constant calls so struggle to take in my own parcels. I have a 'leave them in the blue bin' note on my own door sometimes

the ladder is annoying, send it back, this is assuming you have your own ladder if you ever need one. As PP have said though I’d rather have a secured ladder than one just in a garden somewhere

Honestly op, I really wouldn’t give your neighbour a second thought. I would however drop his ladders round and politely tell him that you now need the space in the garage so can no longer store them.
Myself and my husband are both council estate kids, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that before the always offended are offended. I had a brilliant childhood.
We bought a house on a very affluent street and at no point have I felt not worthy. We bought the house so have just as much right to live here as our neighbours, neighbours who we get on really well with. I think maybe your issue is how you see yourself and your family.

I'm judgy because I don't think people should have to buy tools and expend energy to deal with someone else's plants? Yeh if you're a selfish neighbour who lets their plants overgrow you should be judged for that.

This - I have a reciprocal arrangement with my neighbours on one side so would have done the same. I’d definitely give him his ladders back though 😀

Dont get annoyed just yet, he could be useful for something one day. Just stay away mind yr business until you have to approach him/he approaches you. Do the hedge out of kindness this once.

I would have thought that if your interpretation of how much he dislikes you was correct there's no way he'd want to keep his ladders in your garage...
With the hedge, perhaps he never wanted it and only agreed because the previous owner said they'd maintain both sides of it. Doesn't mean you have to obviously.
From your opening post you do seem to think the whole street is against you for no reason (or because the whole street is racist), not just this person, which honestly seems pretty unlikely.

Imagine a thief using his ladders to break into your house.
Or his ladders going missing , he would expect you to pay for them.
Absolutely not.
Tell him you have your own ladders to store or that you are knocking your garage down and can't store them.
How dare he be so rude.
I would just say good morning if you happen to pass by but it's his job to cut the hedge but he is allowed to throw the clippings over for you to dispose of.