Why does everything feel so different now?

[Toffeenosedrangerr]

I’m not sure exactly how to describe it, but something just feels very different and off compared to 5/6 years ago
Even looking back at social media and how friends interacted with each other on Fb and Instagram, how people seemed more connected.
It just feels like something is missing in the world, some excitement or happiness

Is it just me? Looking back at photos, things felt different and much happier

I absolutely hate it. The tech companies are bringing out things that most people don't want, and forcing it on us, just to make a profit. I am trying to avoid AI because I hate it, because I object to it being added into products with no way to opt out, because people are losing jobs to AI, and because it uses vast amounts of energy. But it's pretty hard to avoid now - Google searches, whatsapp, Facebook, Adobe Acrobat, emails, the list is endless, and in some of them it can't be switched off. Just fuck off AI!

I think the NHS is still fucking brilliant.

Thank you.

I thought it was just me. I dont feel the same and cant seem to get my life to even closely resemble pre covid.

I don’t feel this at all. I’m really happy. I love my life and interact with friends just the same as before, if not more as the pandemic taught me to take nothing for granted. I think too many people watch too much tik tok and the like. Not good for you. Trying to be present and staying away from the news has massively improved my mood.

I think this too. I keep reaching out to say mums at dd school. People like the idea of meeting up but don't actually want to actually meet up.

People only seem to have room for one good friend now too.

The friends I had before covid are still around but we no longer do more than coffee meet ups so I have had to build other friendships onto my life.

Plus five years older and more jaded.

I bloody love my phone. Just used it to book train and theatre tickets for me and my sister. Phone keeps me in contact with people I love and like. I can whip it out and take a photo of anything that takes my fancy. I play my audio books on it whilst walking the dog. Listen to music and podcasts. The world is so interesting.

Go out (not right now!) and look at all the gardens that someone has lovingly tended so that lazy beggars like me can enjoy flowers and shrubs and trees.

Buy a book and sit in a cafe - outside if you like - and when you've read a chapter look around you and see all these people engaging with it other.

Go to Park Run and walk like I do and just enjoy being amongst humanity.

Your friend, Pollyanna

Er, people in the 1930s lived with the threat of war, and then the reality.

In the 1970s, we worried about being blown up by the IRA (and, sadly, a few people were).

In the 1989s, the biggest topic of conversation was what we would do if we heard the 4 minute warning. The threat of nuclear war was a big deal.

So why does nobody on this site have any sense of even recent history? Wars, diseases, financial crises..... they are constant and we will all live through some or all of them. Just have a bit of perspective, people - this is probably one of the safest, wealthiest times in history. We live in a free, democratic country. But there will always be be negative stuff, because people don't change

And I never see anyone going around in their dressing gown!

At first read I kind of agreed with you, but reading further it sounds like you may feel depressed or anxious?

I feel excited about life and have done so consistently for many years. I stay off social media for weeks/months at a time though so perhaps that helps!

That's a brilliant way of putting it!

Feeling flat and that life was just an endless treadmill was one of my first perimenopause symptoms. That and a sore left elbow and an itchy back. I read Mariella frostrup's book and took myself to the GP. Fairly low level HRT has made a significant difference to me.

It's not made my job easy, fixed climate change, undone Brexit or parented the kids, but it doesn't feel as pointless as it did for a year or so.

Personally I felt like we were all in a safe bubble until Sept 11th 2001. Up to then, the world seemed like it had now become a more civilised and reasonable place. Anything like terrorism, wars and plagues felt firmly in the past. The 90's seemed the best times as not much seemed to happen that was too concerning or threatening.
But now with the shitshow the world is in, it feels a vulnerable and unpredictable place and time. I feel bad for the new generation. But thats just my own opinion.

I agree with you OP. I feel like so much changed. My son’s mental health declined since Covid. My company I happily worked for was taken over and I ended up redundant. Social media is just full of AI and endless fake reels that seem so far from reality. Prices have rocketed. My friendship circle has hugely reduced. I feel my outlook is different. I feel flat. We used to have so many lovely family days out which feels non existent which is part of my son’s mental state but I guess because the kids are growing up. There seems to be so much conflict in the world with all the bombings. I am naturally a very happy upbeat person who always looks for the positives but I can’t shift this feeling of unrest and sadness either. I get so nostalgic thinking back to the 90s - it was such a different time. People were connected. Screens and social media have destroyed so much of it. I hate how much technology is so predominate in my kids’ lives. They are so exposed to it and the utter rubbish online, however much you try limiting screen time. It’s just the world they live in - I honestly don’t feel they are having that unfiltered, natural and simple childhood I did and that makes me sad 😔

I'm a pub goer, for me it's the lack of critical thinking, the hate that's churned out across all media re women/immigrants etc that's turned a lot of men into ranting idiots. These are 45+ year olds, it's quite bizarre. Lock down made people's world smaller. Then the cost of living meant less travel/experiences. However I do think that austerity is finally showing the damage it did and we are living with that. As well as the Conservative government having no real interest in life in the UK for the majority.

Social media was great for a time but now it's all adverts, spammy news articles etc so people can't be bothered. Definitely a shame I used to love seeing friends and families comments and photos

I think everyone just needs a reset.

I have a nice life, but I am just mega stressed with work, family and my life is just a million miles an hour.

Yesterday I went round to a friend's house for lunch. A very rare treat. We sat in the garden of her lovely house, and there was no noise aside from the birds. I came home exhausted because that is the first time I have sat down and relaxed for ages.

I just think life is too stimulating now. There is too much to do. Life was easier, and slower years ago. Now it is like a rollercoaster. Look how this year has just flown by. I bet if we look at it, most of us have just worked and done chores.

My relatives live in a Mediterranean country and they have much, much better quality of lives than we have.

I'm the same as you.

Since the children have grown up we have more of a social life than ever. I'm trying to enjoy my life tbe best I can as I do worry about my parents getting old and us getting old. So I'm making the most of it while we can.

I've started limiting my news consumption because I think few of us are going to be people that can drastically change the world but most of us can do right by our loved ones and help out around us.

I reckon I'll have more capacity to do this if I'm not getting depressed and anxious spending too much time dwelling on things I can do nothing about. I just want to be reasonably informed about world events and nothing more now.

@smallglassbottle i'm really curious about the outfits, what were they?

@Toffeenosedrangerr I know what you mean. I'm finding certain things are better where I live now. I used to live in London.

But somebody said to me the other day, that when she walks around the local area, she feels like the heart has been removed from people. (She's not someone I know well. So she doesn't know that lockdown broke me, normally I don't discuss it any more).

But anyway, she was going on about what she feels is a delayed reaction to lockdown.

Meanwhile, I wonder if the fact that people have just vanished into their phones is the most relevant issue here.

as far as I can see, many people across all age groups, feel that life and humans have gone weird. I think the people who don't notice it might be the same people who think technology is brilliant?

Editing to add - I ignored the news for a long time. Even just giving it a casual glance every now and then, you can really see how hysterical and polarised everything is. It's as if people believe it is virtuous to not allow a difference of opinion. And they won't mix with anyone who has a different opinion. As if a teenage mentality has spread to grown adults.

It does feel like the whole world went completely mad and that's it. Like there's no hope of recovery.

you have been so lucky. This is what I was expecting to happen but it didn't. I do not know a single person who wanted to go back to normal after Covid - they fucking loved lockdown and they disappeared. I mean, the numbers are just extraordinary. I work for myself and if I count former friends, colleagues, extended family, mum's friends - the only people who were straight back round each other's houses were mum's older friends. Possibly because in that age group they're more conscious it might be the last time they get to hang out with their friends.

I'm just procrastinating trying not to do any work, but we've talked about this on here before and some people got it. I had an ex-boyfriend say to me that Internet dating was going to damage friendships. I thought he was nuts. But now I see what he means. All that language and false behaviour has leaked into friendship.

and the therapy speak! Don't get me started.

This was meant for @ScribblyyGum but the quote fell off

Come on, the pandemic was over 5 years ago now! There will be things you’re upset/worried/stressed about but please stop putting everything down to Covid.

I don’t relate to many of the posts here. For me, life is good and yes, there are issues in the world but as we can do very little about most of them, I just try not to worry about it. I hadn’t actually thought about it since I read this thread but it must make a difference that I’m not on social media, don’t take my phone everywhere I go and definitely don’t doom scroll (what do people look at for hours on end?)

I just prefer to go to the gym, the pub, nights out, book holidays, go for walks/shopping see friends and family and do the things that make me happy. There have been awful periods in my life but I’m a glass half-full type and you just have to get yourself through the downs to enjoy all the ups there are out there.

@theriseandfallofFranklinSaint is that directed at me? Just because the OP didn't mention Covid. Neither did I - I mentioned lockdowns.

Ignore me if the question/comment wasn't for me!

I’m one of those who thinks that lockdown was a massive, massive overreaction, and I certainly couldn’t wait for normality; and I’m cautiously happy,

I don’t lose sleep over Trump, pandemics, climate change.

But what I do worry about is how lockdown crossed a rubicon, the world reacted in a way that nobody thought possible, and set a MASSIVE precedent, with the government (in its own words) deliberately frightening the pants off the public to gain compliance, the continual gaslighting, divide and conquer and absurd restrictions, and the way the public not only didn’t resist at all, but pleaded for more, and turned on each other. I worry that this could easily happen again, now that the precedent has been set. It might not even be for a pandemic - it could happen for something quite different, if the government decides to deliberately frighten the public again. Not one politician has denounced lockdown, admitted that it caused massive damage to children, and said that they will strive to avoid it ever happening again. Instead, it has been quietly shelved, ready to be used again, when if the inquiry concludes “we should have locked down harder, faster, longer, and we will next time”. This does worry me, much more than any virus.

@EmeraldRoulette no, not you, sorry!

Just the people who have mentioned Covid in this (and other) threads!

I'm 55, I remember most of those things perfectly well (apart from the 1930s), so I do have a sense of perspective thanks. Things feel different now. It's due to quite a few things that are going on and there's no dial back to restore a sense of equilibrium.