To be unsure what neurotypical is anymore

[rainingitspouring2]

So this is not to antagonise or offend and maybe it could be because I am on the spectrum myself (but this has never been implied) but I am starting to question what being neurotypical looks like these days.

On social media so many of my suggested reels, posts etc are about neurodivergence and also articles in the media etc. Celebs revealing they have adhd or dyslexia. I have to say a lot of it is relatable to some degree to most people (that I know anyway). I have 2 young DS and so many of their friends have potential ADHD/ASD according to their parents. Or I notice traits in kids but their parents have never said anything (but I would just think they were a neurotypical kid if I didn't have so much awareness now) Even some the parents at the school gate are saying they have some neurodivergence too. So I am finding myself noticing potential traits in almost every individual I have close contact with.
I know people say with neurodivergence 'birds of a feather flock together' perhaps that is the case but I'm just loosing sight of what a neurotypical and what isn't.
I'd almost find it helpful if we had traits of neurotypicals outlined explicitly to see whether we aligne with that or not. I am getting quite confused.
Does anyone else feel the same or AIBU? Again not meaning to offend just looking to discuss

@BlueLegumeyes, I think people forget that NT kids can be pains in the ass too. That’s why people generally have all ND kids, I think it’s less so about genetics and more so about that they have no experience of what children are like so if their elder child is ND, they assume their younger child must be.
My NT child is equally as hard work as my ND child.

By contrast I'm ND and never lose my keys because I'm neurotic about them and they live in the same place all the time so losing them is not an option!

Nope - bog standard inner London Primary.

The kids are great and they do really well - 8 of my 14 'labelled' children have got into very selective secondaries. It's just a real ask for teachers to provide a completely bespoke learning experience for such a large proportion of the class.

I've thought this for some time. "Neurotypical" doesn't seem to be "typical" at all!

I know the parents well. And my child is in year 1, so I’d imagine that 4 will increase by the time they’re in Y6 and have worked their way through wait lists.

Social contagion doesn’t just affect Joe Bloggs down the pub. It affects psychologists, teachers, parents too. More diagnosis and awareness = more people looking for symptoms and too easily attributing to ND conditions.

Is there a test to diagnose being neuro typical?

I think self diagnosis is a massive problem. It's not just things like autism/adhd but postnatal depression, ptsd, sprained ankle, migraines etc. I have a family member who talks about when they had a benign cyst removed as "when I had cancer". So many people add the word "severe" to their diagnosis when not told this by a professional. Random people diagnosing each other. Unfortunately I think with waiting times being so long and many people not meeting the criteria for referral it's going to get worse.

It’s not a diagnosis.

@Ohthatsabitshit sorry I will re word my question. If there is a test to get a diagnosis of being ND - which will be many tests | appreciate. What percentage of people tested come away with no diagnosis-so are deemed NT? I am currently reading a book called The Age of Diagnosis. It is interesting and thought provoking but also highlights how nuanced the whole situation is.

My son was assessed aged 3 and we were told not autistic. Then he was assessed again aged 9 and diagnosed with autism.

I don’t think anyone is diagnosed as neurodivergent.

That book and its flaws has already been discussed not last re the author who has zero ND, cancer experience or expertise pontificating about areas she really doesn’t know much about.

Why is it a problem, the symptoms are there regardless and people are often right.

But necessary. It won’t be a bespoke learning experience. When planning she/he will teach the same subject matter with some differentiation, children that need it will have interventions outside of the classroom. Sadly it probably won’t be much .

Ah so you know more than psychologists, psychiatrists, teachers, parents, CaMHS, ND teams….

Got it 🙄

You do realise that people can have thoughts and opinions right? And that these do sometimes differ from those in authority.

Scientists, doctors have been wrong in the past, both individually but also as professionals. As we learn more, professional guidance changes.

Im not proclaiming to be right, these are my opinions, of which I’m entitled.

Explain the increase in trans children without the concept of social contagion. Are those doctors right to be medicating children?

Please don’t dismiss ND by putting it on a par with trans. It’s entirely different.

Of course it is (although there’s a growing appreciation of a link between autism and trans). Please don’t derail what I’m saying.

If you had read my comment, you’d have seen I was saying that those in authority don’t always get things right. Cue, doctors prescribing trans hormones to children.

Not relevant as ND has been around for a very long time, there is a huge amount of knowledge surrounding it,is often hereditary, there are often common big difficulties that come with it and several professionals involved.

Your suggestion that mistakes made re supporting trans children casts doubt on expertise re ND is ridiculous.

It's not a problem when some people do it but other people can be over dramatic and exaggerate.

I think more people claim to be ND these days than NT. There's so many people who say they might have a couple of traits which suggest ND.

I think it's entirely possible that it is NT to be ND! As in most of us, possibly 100% of us, have ND traits and characteristics.

It’s utter madness and an influx of undiagnosed but “self diagnosed” highly vocal and sometimes aggressive into what was already an underfunded misunderstood population has caused huge damage. Anyone who thinks this “doesn’t hurt anyone” is deluded.

@Thursst0nthe problem with very high levels of diagnosed children and adults as ND is what we are seeing currently.
Theme parks etc with special access/ disability access meaning no queues etc are extended to 200 plus visitors a day so result in queues/ noise/ squashed together with others. People are not basing it on need. My kid is ND but can queue. Many ND children can, and some can’t but there is a culture of ‘my child can’t’ rather than my child can.
Record numbers of DLA applications
1000+ kids waiting for EHCPs even when they are at recommended levels for academic progress.
All time low levels of school absence because of the mantras echoed on SEN chat rooms that school is traumatic and awful for SEN children.
Low demand parenting and claiming PDA for completely normal child like behaviour meaning we are raising children who have no boundaries.
Reasonable adjustments for all (Sarah can’t wear shoes, Ralph needs only plain rice and to eat raspberries during maths, Lola doesn’t do PE as it’s triggering) causing a teacher recruitment crisis where every other school is at crisis point.
We cannot carry on like this. We have to go by need and get rid of diagnosis.

Yes, this. I have 5 ND children but only one struggles with queuing, and sometimes he can queue if it's not too long and there are things to look at. We went out with a family member to a theme park and they kept asking to "borrow" ds's queue jumping pass for rides that ds couldn't go on and got miffed when I said no. One of my other dc gets a queue jumping pass for the lunch queue at school so he doesn't get knocked over in the stampede. The others don't need it so they don't have one. There is a lot of "I want my child to have the same adjustments as that other child has" among school parents. Unfortunately it is sometimes the parents who shout loudest get things for their child. My child wears socks with a certain character on at school as a comfort thing. He would rather have the actual cuddly toy of the character with him but it's a compromise. At secondary school he will have to wear the regulation black socks over the top.