Page 5 | DP being horrible towards my DCat

Yasmin98 · 2025-06-14T08:12:25+00:00

DP and I don’t live with each other but he stays over a couple nights a week. Recently, he has been making increasingly rude comments about my DCat and when I challenge him he just says ‘she’s a cat, she doesn’t have feelings’. He really isn’t a pet person which is fine but I would expect him to treat mine with respect. Has anyone had a similar situation and found a solution? I am reluctant to move him in full time unless his attitude changes.

nomas · 14/06/2025 10:05

I bet he is kicking her or tormenting her when you’re not around.

Get rid of him.

HailtotheBop · 14/06/2025 10:06

Your updates make it crystal clear - he's showing you he's not a good person. I'd be getting rid.

BunnyRuddington · 14/06/2025 10:06

I’ve voted YABU for keeping this man in your life. The first time someone mentioned kicking my DCat he’d be gone.

An ultimatum won’t change him, he's deeply unpleasant.

Fine if you want to live with a man who is so uncaring and is actually telling you he’d use violence against defensive animals but don’t subject your DCat to his behaviour.

raspberrieswithchocolate · 14/06/2025 10:07

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

The more you say about this man, the worse he sounds. Find someone better, he doesn't respect pets or women.

Tortielady · 14/06/2025 10:08

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 09:40

It is things like, if DCat gets in my way again I’m going to kick her like a football.

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Oh no. There's a world of difference between "share my fish with you, Fat Girl? In your dreams!" and spiteful threats. The first is a friendly interaction with the cat (even if the cat isn't getting what she wants. Yet.) the second is directed at you and he means it. Send this fellow on his way. There are plenty of men out there and some of them love cats.

FreeRider · 14/06/2025 10:09

He's a disgusting arsehole, for both the way he talks about your cat - of course she has fucking feelings - and about women - I don't give a flying fuck what his ex did to him, that's a beyond vile thing to say about her!

Why on God's green Earth are you even considering staying with this cunt? He's threatening to harm your pet, ffs!

DisforDarkChocolate · 14/06/2025 10:09

I'm not a cat lover but this is a massive red flag. Cats have feelings, if he doesn't think so he's ok with being cruel to a cat.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 14/06/2025 10:11

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” ~Maya Angelou

He has shown you who he is. Someone who is threatening to a small animal and disrespectful about his ex. He is not a prince among men.

Bonjovispyjamas · 14/06/2025 10:12

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

You don't know that he wouldn't kick her though, you're just presuming.

So what are you going to do? Everyone is saying dump him, but you haven't responded to that.

neverbeenskiing · 14/06/2025 10:12

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

Ugh. A misogynist who doesn't like cats. Its a no from me.

TheFormidableMrsC · 14/06/2025 10:13

I would see this as red flag behaviour personally. People who are cruel or mistreat animals are not decent people.

Thereislightattheendofthetunnel · 14/06/2025 10:14

Goodness sake OP.

Leave this mysoginistic prick and don’t waste a second more of your youth on this useless prick

raspberrieswithchocolate · 14/06/2025 10:14

@Yasmin98 I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

Are you going to take that chance? I wouldn't. Your cat needs you to protect her and act in her best interest, don't ever leave her alone with him. I'll say it again - find someone better, get rid of this man.

anytipswelcome · 14/06/2025 10:14

So he’s a misogynist as well then? Lovely. Having read everyone’s replies OP what are you planning to do? Do you really want to waste any more time on this prick?

Slatterndisgrace · 14/06/2025 10:15

Bonjovispyjamas · 14/06/2025 10:12

You don't know that he wouldn't kick her though, you're just presuming.

So what are you going to do? Everyone is saying dump him, but you haven't responded to that.

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Are you expecting her to do it ‘live’ on mumsnet? 😁

PlumpAndCircumstance · 14/06/2025 10:15

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

He doesn’t sound a nice man at all.

TheFormidableMrsC · 14/06/2025 10:15

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

Christ. What a prick. You can’t stay with this man. He’s shown you what he is, listen to him.

Justsomethoughts23 · 14/06/2025 10:15

My first LTB 😂

RampantIvy · 14/06/2025 10:16

It is things like, if DCat gets in my way again I’m going to kick her like a football

Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

This is dumping territory. The more you post about him the more reason to dump him.

RedIsNotMyFavouriteColour · 14/06/2025 10:16

He'd be out the fucking door in a split second. Cunt!

LeftieRightsHoarder · 14/06/2025 10:16

Chazbots · 14/06/2025 09:14

How people treat animals is a good indicator of their character.

Absolutely true.

TheOccupier · 14/06/2025 10:18

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

He's horrible. Get rid.

namechangedforvalidreasons · 14/06/2025 10:18

It’s the fact he says to you, an adult woman, out loud, ‘the cat doesn’t know what I’m saying.’

No shit, ya plum. Verbally abusive to a creature that doesn’t know or care about what you’re saying while defending your right to do so to someone who does.
That’d be plenty for me. Too thick to be attractive.

GreenEggsIAm · 14/06/2025 10:19

Leave him.

Chia68 · 14/06/2025 10:20

Yasmin98 · 14/06/2025 10:01

I don’t think he would actually kick DCat, I know the statement looks extreme written down.

He said something last night (which prompted me to post) about DCat reminding him of his ex who he broke up with. Saying that she was lazy too but at least she had her uses in other ways (meaning sexually) which I found really uncomfortable.

I think his attitude towards the cat isn’t even your biggest problem here.