New neighbour sunbathing in the nude

[ZooHannah]

We moved in to our dream home last month, we have a corner plot with only one direct neighbour who is a (I believe) single man and has always been polite and friendly in our initial conversations.

DH looked out of our bedroom window today to see our neighbour sunbathing completely starkers. He came downstairs to tell me and I couldn’t believe it when I went upstairs and saw for myself.

I want to go round to say something however DH has told me I am being ridiculous and he is on his own property so can go what he wants.

AIBU? I appreciate neighbourly relations but I am absolutely repulsed by this.

I’m pretty sure if a naked man was wandering about Leicester Square the police would respond

Perhaps. However, as you can see from their own training materials, they will be very unlikely to respond to a person sunbathing nude in their own garden, regardless of whether the neighbours can see them, since this is a lawful activity.

You lost me at telling me I was taking the law TOO LITERALLY

It does not say "be mindful you neighbours might be busybodies"

He would not be told to stop doing a lawful activity in his own home but you WOULD be told to stop wasting police time and harassing him

Just because you chose to take offence at him doing a daily activity doesn't make HIS INTENT do cause offence. Which is the crux

This too

If it's a frequent thing that cause you offence to see then... stop looking

Otherwise you are actively seeking that offence

‘I had to stand at my bedroom window for 3 weeks but eventually I caught my neighbour sunbathing naked and was absolutely disgusted’

There's literally an article above where a man was LAWFULLY naked in public and when arrested, he also rang the police and was then dearrested and also told he could complain about the UNLAWFUL arrest

There are naked cycle rides and Tube days

But sure...

Some people are very easily 'alarmed' and 'distressed'! Were he visible from a downstairs window, eg in front of your dining room, you may have a point but not many normal people spend time gazing out of a bedroom window, it's usually a quick 'is it raining' etc glance, unless of course you want to enjoy the sight of a naked man in his own garden! If a man complained that when he looked at a neighbour's bedroom window he saw a naked woman he would be told to stop looking and being a pervert!

'Handled'? Oh, Matron!

Then they’d look stupid - just like the ones who unlawfully arrested the man in the link upthread.

There are naked cycle rides and Tube days

You see that's where I get off the bike. I've no real objections to naturalists, particularly those merely sunbathing in their own fenced, private back garden bar an overlooking bedroom window from the easily outraged new neighbours next door. However, I draw the line at hygiene issues. I'd hate to sit on a seat that someone else’s unclad bum has been on, ditto for bike saddles, & the Tube, jeez BO, naked bums & sweaty crotches on publicly accessible seats all in a confined space - gross, that's just gross.... ugh

"Yes officer, the minute the sun came out I knew what was going on. He'd be out there, naked. So I rushed to the window and waited and he did! He came out and lay there naked. The pervert."

I think they are probably on their own bikes...

Tube seats are gross and I'd not want to sit my own naked ass on them tbh anyway

A friend has suggested it’s a man trying to assert his dominance - a single bloke with bravado. That’s not the impression we’ve had from conversations but it would explain how brazen he’s being...

Really? Trying to assert dominance alone, naked and in his own garden... You said your property is the nearest neighbour to him, and your bedroom window is the only room overlooking his garden. And he's the one being brazen? Oh please stop clutching your pearls...

I think you need more sensible friends to stop your madness and what appears to be verging on controlling behaviour. Your kids won't see anything over the fence if they've been educated about privacy.

What about this chap's distress about being spied on by new nosy neighbours from the darkness of their bedroom into his private garden.

The fact you're giving this more headspace by gossiping about him to your girlfriends sounds like the lady doth protest a little too much. A bit of titillating gossip about a single man who appears to to keep himself to himself. Good grief!

I bet this is old news and other neighbours close by couldn't give the shiniest of shits....

I am so grateful that overall, sanity has prevailed, since 86% of posters voted that the OP is unreasonable. It is really reassuring that only a minority are as puritanical and hysterical about such a non issue.

Suspect it’s the most exciting thing to happen to OP and her friends for weeks.

It also says “advise the complainant that no offences are being committed”, so presumably they can be seen 🙄

Goodness you sound unpleasant. You are the new neighbour, not him. And sunbathing in the privacy of his own garden is hardly comparable to standing naked outside a school. You really are a curtain twitcher. Is he doing anything? Waving his willy about? Leering at you?

No?

Then shut up.

I’d be telling him he needs to cover up as his garden is overlooked and you don’t want to see him naked. I’d actually also be calling 101 and logging it - as he knows he can be seen, he sounds like a flasher to me & these things escalate.

Oh for goodness sake.

No. Op just needs to stop spying on him in his garden.

And 101 would say if he's just sunbathing he's not doing anything wrong

He's not a fucking flasher ffs. He's not leaping out to show his todger off. He's just sunbathing

He is causing distress if he continues and as YOU say that’s the crux of it. You don’t get to decide what’s causing distress. It literally says that advice from the police is “Don’t assume you won’t be arrested if you sunbathe naked in your garden”

The irony here is priceless.

It's the poor sun bathing neighbour's privacy that is actually being violated by the newly arrived easily outraged neighbours here.

Further these new neighbours are now tarnishing his reputation also, by gossiping to friends about him, giving out about him online and threatening to call the authorities about his absolutely legal behaviour in the privacy of his own garden I.e. sunning himself on a sun lounger in the nude.

Her DH called her upstairs to spy on the neighbour in the garden next door and she is feeling aggrieved!? Lady you need to take a good look at yourself in the mirror 🪞!!

P.s. preferably with your clothes on though, for fear you might upset yourself or something!? ;)

Look stupid to who? The vast majority of people wouldn’t expect or want to see a grown man walking about with nothing on making an exhibition of himself in a busy area. There is no need whatsoever other than for attention. They’ll probably wear a board saying “Look at me” and get a sick kick out of it.

He is doing a passive activity in his private space. He isn't INTENDING to cause offence (which is the actual caveat, not causing it but the intent to)

It literally says "advice they aren't doing anything unlawful" actually