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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New neighbour sunbathing in the nude

827 replies

ZooHannah · 13/06/2025 22:26

We moved in to our dream home last month, we have a corner plot with only one direct neighbour who is a (I believe) single man and has always been polite and friendly in our initial conversations.

DH looked out of our bedroom window today to see our neighbour sunbathing completely starkers. He came downstairs to tell me and I couldn’t believe it when I went upstairs and saw for myself.

I want to go round to say something however DH has told me I am being ridiculous and he is on his own property so can go what he wants.

AIBU? I appreciate neighbourly relations but I am absolutely repulsed by this.

OP posts:
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6
PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:10

CorbyTrouserPress · 14/06/2025 23:05

Your posts are causing me distress. Are you going to stop posting?

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Oh we have a comedian in the making - very good 👏

Alltheyellowbirds · 14/06/2025 23:11

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:08

No I’m not clicking on a link from a random on the internet- no offence

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Oh for goodness sake, you can see from the address what the article is going to be. Is everything in your life as dramatic as your posts on this thread? It must be exhausting.

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:14

Alltheyellowbirds · 14/06/2025 23:11

Oh for goodness sake, you can see from the address what the article is going to be. Is everything in your life as dramatic as your posts on this thread? It must be exhausting.

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So? 😂 As if I’m going to read links because folk on here say so

JohnofWessex · 14/06/2025 23:18

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:08

No I’m not clicking on a link from a random on the internet- no offence

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Que?

Its Guidance to Police Officers from the College of Policing

It clearly states that the OLP's neighbours behaviour IS NOT an offence

End of discussion

Mumtobabyhavoc · 14/06/2025 23:22

TheGr8Cornholio · 14/06/2025 00:46

I am not making anything up. If the man is deliberately exposing his genitals (which he seems to be doing, as he's parading about naked in open air, in view of his neighbours houses) and this is taking place in view of children, or in view of other non-consenting adults, this could be construed as indecent exposure.

Hopefully, a quick chat with the police would clarify the matter. A man's desire to lounge naked does not take precedence over the well-being and innocence of children. He might truly mean no harm, but his behaviour is inconsiderate and inappropriate. It is a matter for the police.

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It's a matter for the police?
😂😂😂
Oh, dear god! 🤦‍♀️
The neighbour is simply sunbathing in his own backyard. There's a fence. OP only saw him because she looked out her upstairs window!

BrickHare · 14/06/2025 23:27

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 22:59

Yes it is problematic. You might find it completely normal but guess what, not everyone else does and neither should they have to put up with weirdos who don’t adhere to social norms

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Racism played a huge role in social norm throughout history. Are people that didn’t adhere to that weirdos?

Mumtobabyhavoc · 14/06/2025 23:27

connie26 · 14/06/2025 05:32

It's a bit weird. Of course, he's entitled to sunbathe bollock naked in his own garden but the fact that he knows you can see him, well... I can see why you feel uncomfortable op.

Nowhere in the OP's posts does it indicate the neighbour knows he can be seen.
It does seem OP is watching him, though. Curiously. 😉

Alltheyellowbirds · 14/06/2025 23:31

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:14

So? 😂 As if I’m going to read links because folk on here say so

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Perhaos you ought to, because you keep making erroneous statements about the law, and people are providing the links to show you what the law actually is.

Mumoftwoandcats · 14/06/2025 23:33

Can you only see his garden from your upstairs window? If so, leave him be....and stop looking. If anyone can see him from the street, you might want to point that out to him though...

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:42

BrickHare · 14/06/2025 23:27

Racism played a huge role in social norm throughout history. Are people that didn’t adhere to that weirdos?

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The barrel has been scraped with that comparison.

Menobaby79 · 14/06/2025 23:43

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 22:08

There is always apologists for inappropriate behaviour I suppose…

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Yep, some seriously naive (or stupid) posters on here, NAMALT is in full force on here tonight.

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:46

Alltheyellowbirds · 14/06/2025 23:31

Perhaos you ought to, because you keep making erroneous statements about the law, and people are providing the links to show you what the law actually is.

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I know what the law is.

I know it’s not illegal to be naked in your garden.

It’s a very grey area and certainly not as black and white as some people are making out on here, saying he’s doing nothing wrong. I beg to differ from a legal standpoint if it was happening often.

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:50

Menobaby79 · 14/06/2025 23:43

Yep, some seriously naive (or stupid) posters on here, NAMALT is in full force on here tonight.

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Absolutely agree. Falling over themselves to point out why it’s totally fine 🤯

Chinsupmeloves · 14/06/2025 23:50

It's his garden, this is what he likes to do. Most of us wouldn't but if only seeing it through from an upstairs window, it's not in your face.

With DC, they will just find it funny really and be a learning curve that everyone is different. Far better to have this than a neighbour playing loud music, aggressive etc.

Personally I wouldn't be repulsed, I've not lived a sheltered life and have experienced so many things and this would not shock me.

Summerbay23 · 14/06/2025 23:58

I might be old school (and slightly childish) but my kids and I would probably have had a bit of a giggle about it (assuming he was literally just sunbathing and not doing anything suggestive or inappropriate).

Fernticket · 15/06/2025 00:00

I hope he had put some sun cream on😂😂

BrickHare · 15/06/2025 00:03

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:42

The barrel has been scraped with that comparison.

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I don’t see how. Your compassion of someone sunbathing nude to a sexual predator who is doing it for pleasure and is a danger to children is scrapping the barrel. Adhering to social norms isn’t the flex you think it is. But yes all sheep will eventually follow.

Alltheyellowbirds · 15/06/2025 00:07

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:46

I know what the law is.

I know it’s not illegal to be naked in your garden.

It’s a very grey area and certainly not as black and white as some people are making out on here, saying he’s doing nothing wrong. I beg to differ from a legal standpoint if it was happening often.

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But it isn’t happening often is it? The entire argument you are picking with everyone seems to be centred on him being told he’s causing distress and carrying on regardless, when a) it’s only happened once and b) he is unaware they saw him let alone that he’s caused any distress.

PITCHpink · 15/06/2025 00:08

BrickHare · 15/06/2025 00:03

I don’t see how. Your compassion of someone sunbathing nude to a sexual predator who is doing it for pleasure and is a danger to children is scrapping the barrel. Adhering to social norms isn’t the flex you think it is. But yes all sheep will eventually follow.

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It’s the laughable the number of people defending the Dirty Dens and that it’s all above board and he simply wants to get some more vitamin d through his Willy…. Oh aye…. It couldn’t possibly be because he gets off on knowing women can see his dick.

People saying it’s his garden he can do what he likes… The garden isn’t private if it’s overlooked. I seen one poster say well it’s not his fault, how’s he supposed to know people can see him… erm because he’ll see the bludy windows 😂

BrickHare · 15/06/2025 00:09

PITCHpink · 14/06/2025 23:46

I know what the law is.

I know it’s not illegal to be naked in your garden.

It’s a very grey area and certainly not as black and white as some people are making out on here, saying he’s doing nothing wrong. I beg to differ from a legal standpoint if it was happening often.

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But it’s not happening often is it? It happened once. For all we know it could be his annual naked sunbathing day. A lot of assumptions you’ve made over something only happening once, and Op only mentioned her and her husband being at home at the time.

Alltheyellowbirds · 15/06/2025 00:10

Summerbay23 · 14/06/2025 23:58

I might be old school (and slightly childish) but my kids and I would probably have had a bit of a giggle about it (assuming he was literally just sunbathing and not doing anything suggestive or inappropriate).

Yes. This is exactly how it should be handled.

BrickHare · 15/06/2025 00:10

Alltheyellowbirds · 15/06/2025 00:07

But it isn’t happening often is it? The entire argument you are picking with everyone seems to be centred on him being told he’s causing distress and carrying on regardless, when a) it’s only happened once and b) he is unaware they saw him let alone that he’s caused any distress.

Edited
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Exactly. A lot of assuming and hyperbole going on over it happening once…

PITCHpink · 15/06/2025 00:11

Alltheyellowbirds · 15/06/2025 00:07

But it isn’t happening often is it? The entire argument you are picking with everyone seems to be centred on him being told he’s causing distress and carrying on regardless, when a) it’s only happened once and b) he is unaware they saw him let alone that he’s caused any distress.

Edited
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My argument is that if it’s causing distress to his neighbour then it is a problem. A one off, not much can be done, but judging by many of these comments, people think it’s fine full stop. There doesn’t appear to be a line. It’s only the middle of June so there’s potentially months left of warm weather so if it’s not nipped in the bud, it could be a regular occurrence

BrickHare · 15/06/2025 00:12

PITCHpink · 15/06/2025 00:08

It’s the laughable the number of people defending the Dirty Dens and that it’s all above board and he simply wants to get some more vitamin d through his Willy…. Oh aye…. It couldn’t possibly be because he gets off on knowing women can see his dick.

People saying it’s his garden he can do what he likes… The garden isn’t private if it’s overlooked. I seen one poster say well it’s not his fault, how’s he supposed to know people can see him… erm because he’ll see the bludy windows 😂

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So what if it was a woman? She would surely also be a sexual predator and need to be reported to the police asap?

PITCHpink · 15/06/2025 00:13

BrickHare · 15/06/2025 00:09

But it’s not happening often is it? It happened once. For all we know it could be his annual naked sunbathing day. A lot of assumptions you’ve made over something only happening once, and Op only mentioned her and her husband being at home at the time.

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She doesn’t think it’s appropriate and neither do I. She asked our thoughts and that’s what she got.