New neighbour sunbathing in the nude

[ZooHannah]

We moved in to our dream home last month, we have a corner plot with only one direct neighbour who is a (I believe) single man and has always been polite and friendly in our initial conversations.

DH looked out of our bedroom window today to see our neighbour sunbathing completely starkers. He came downstairs to tell me and I couldn’t believe it when I went upstairs and saw for myself.

I want to go round to say something however DH has told me I am being ridiculous and he is on his own property so can go what he wants.

AIBU? I appreciate neighbourly relations but I am absolutely repulsed by this.

😮 No, OP, please don't get a grip.

No, the law is perfectly clear, he does not have to cover it up outside.

No he wouldn't. If reported to the police by the school, there would be steps to follow, first off for example having a conversation with him. Teach your children not to stare into his garden. If they say "look mummy, that mister is naked!" Tell them not to look and explain it's his garden and he's not hurting anyone.... Which he's not. And teach yourself not to look too.

Or have a stroke….

I’ll grab my coat. 🧥

Your ability to divine the malfeasance in the thoughts of a man astound me.

There is an inherent imbalance in the law about nudity. If you're a woman, especially one who is young and/or pretty, then you could be out in public totally naked and not be attended by the police. Any argument against your dress code can be refuted as one of body-sgaming or liberation.

If you're a man, being naked even in your own bedroom, with the curtains not completely closed will render you liable to accusations of indecent exposure

A woman, doing the same thing, will render any man that sees her (even from their own garden) as potentially a peeping Tom.

We have asymmetric laws, and worse, the accusation is almost always accompanied by "he's not even fit".

It was refreshing, recently, to be abroad and see men of many ages, swimming in speedos, without people tutting and expecting them to be covered from their beergut to their knees.

Agree. Very sad the see the west have sexualised the naked body so much it’s seen as something perverse. Many countries in the east still have women walking around full breasts on show and no one batters an eyelid. Here, you’ll get comments about how breastfeeding is disgusting or calling a man sunbathing in his own garden a pervert. It says a lot about the people making such comments.

The man is an animal of this world on property he has worked to call 'his'. Let the sunchild be. (Unless he starts helicoptering it...)

We had this some 20 years ago. Adjoining London Gardens. I was a bit shocked. But actually, we decided it was his garden. And that that was okay. The kids were completely unfazed. They liked going to visit him. He obviously put clothes on for that. He and his subsequently deceased wife produce cakes and tadpoles and books and mud pies. They put on clothes by agreement the kids came to visit for 20 minutes. Live and let live live I say. PS, I wouldn’t do it because I would look so deeply unattractive and I will get bitten by insects.

Are you selling tickets?

Dear Mumsnet

I have lived in my house for 10 years and have just recently acquired new neighbours.

I sunbathe naked because I am a nudist and, while not having the greatest body, I believe that nudity is one of the best ways for people to become comforts le with their own body. It's a secluded garden, fenced all around, and our houses are 50 yards apart.

I have noticed that my new neighbour is spying on me from their upstairs window, first one person then both. I'm not sure but I think they may be using binoculars.

AIBU to report them to the police, or should I post an anonymous letter through their door?

Report to police ASAP. Bloody perverts spying on you. They’ll end up on the register! Do you have children? Someone please think of the children?!

Start practising nude yoga really give them something to look at.

Add a sign that says stop looking perverts.

🤣

It wouldn't bother me since it's his personal property but if there are children around the decent thing to do would be to wear some pants. Yes we all have genitals but we don't need to share them with the whole world and I'm sure parents would rather their kids don't see Dave next door's willy.

What a weird reply…:..

I think, Next Door Dave's Willy, reads better. 🤓

Sorry, I am a bit confused.

What is it that happens to a child if they see a willy, not an erect willy, not a willy being waved at them... just, seeing a willy.

Do they... explode?

Do they ... shrivel up and turn to dust?

What dramatic thing is it that occurs if a childs view is momentarily turned upon a relatively distant willy?

The decent thing for op to do would be for her and her husband to stop perving on the neighbour for a start and teach her kids about the garden of Eden. Maybe Op could read into that as well.

They explode. You were right the first time.

It astounds me that people are suggesting it’s as normal as getting a cup of tea. It really really isn’t a societal norm.

Just call the police and report it 🤷‍♀️

You’re right, it’s not a societal norm. Neither is putting sugar on chips. Both, however, are perfectly legal.

Well here is a real life example of being nude in public and ‘distressing children’ https://metro.co.uk/2023/05/31/hastings-naturist-harassed-by-off-duty-cop-for-being-nude-on-bench-18874179/

Why bother? This is how they’ll respond: https://library.college.police.uk/docs/college-of-policing/C849IO118-public-nudity-aid-revised.pdf

Rubbish, there are people sunbathing naked or topless in their gardens all across the country, you just don’t know because their gardens are private. This poor chap clearly thought that due to the high fence surrounding his garden he had privacy and no-one would see, but sadly he was wrong.

Are you for real ? It’s his personal space , I’m sure he has fences for a reason . Stop looking