Called Unsociable 10 year old a fat c*nt

[Herefortea2]

Ok, am I the worst person ever??
Last week I was at marks and spencers and there was this boy there, about 11 who was riding around on a electric scooter, whizzing past people and behaving in a passive aggressive way. When I past him he loudly made throwing up noises several times right in front of me, to scare/shock me and I said oh are you ok, maybe you need a doctor (because I don't like to be initimdated by youths). Anyway I do the shop and keep thinking about him, I was in a bad mood already and he really annoyed me, I'm fed up of little shits thinking they can terrorise people.
Anyway I saw him again on the way out and again he was whizzing past scaring people. He came past me again and then I said it.....I said 'fat cnt'!!! Now I actually do not use that word, I don't like it, I don't like it when it's used around me either but I was so pissed off that that's what I said!!!! Anyway he circled round and was like what did you say....I ignored him and he started insulting me and following me as I walked to my car, saying is this your car you fucking bitch, cnt, etc etc. I walked away saying I'm calling the police! Then this guy comes over who's his dad! He apologies and says he's trying to get him home (the kid had been in the car park for half an hour at least, maybe longer), the kid tells the dad what I called him and the dad says 'no she didn't' then the kid goes off at the dad for taking a strangers side. The dad is completely useless as the kid is still circling me where I actually have to push him away from me! Eventually he leaves after a lot of verbal abuse, from the kid. Now I'm thinking I shouldn't have done it and feeling guilty and also worried that I can't go back to M&S because he might be there and start abusing me and I have 2 young children. Thoughts? I am going to hell?

As annoying as this kid sounds, I can’t lie to you OP, If you called my kid a fat cunt, you wouldn’t have to worry about going to marks and Spencer’s again.

yeah, the kid was out of order and annoying but he didn’t swear at you or threaten until you called him a fat cunt no? And also if I was the kid, I’d be quite pissed off my dad didn’t believe a stranger would call me a fat cunt?? You know why the dad didn’t believe it? Because it’s so fucking outrageous.
You go to a staff member, who have security, who would’ve dealt with this.

also just to add. Yeah YABU, the moment you called a child a fat cunt.

Yeah sorry I think you're in the wrong here. You walk up to their staff, you tell them - there's a child out there who's intimidating people and being unsafe on a scooter - please deal with it. They could call police, if they have a security guard they could go out and speak to them. What you don't do is call a child a fat c*unt.

You're the adult. Act like it instead of stooping to his level. What you did was inflame the situation.

YABU

Was he actually fat?

Oh OP….you sound like a reasonable person but that’s such an unacceptable thing to say. I mean don’t lose any sleep over it, I understand the provocation….but in future definitely don’t call any other 11 year olds a fat c*nt

Does it actually matter?

Well of course you shouldn’t have said it and I hope you do feel guilty.

The child’s behaviour was appalling and his father obviously can’t control him, but none of that justifies your language.

You were probably lucky that the father didn’t believe his son.

She doesn't sound like a reasonable person, she sounds like she THINKS she is a reasonable person! She isnt reasonable because of her behaviour, no reasonable person would do this.

Yes you are in the wrong. It is our role as adults to model good behaviour and you failed to do that.

Totally fine to pull him up on his behaviour, but in an adult way.

Yeah, that was out of order. You're an adult, with a fully developed brain and the ability to resolve conflicts without resorting to calling children cunts. I don't think that kind of reaction is justified.

It does actually

Personally it sounds like the kid deserved it. Too many unruly kids these days with feeble parents telling them to ‘use their words’ - considering how he spoke to you that language was not new to him and to retaliate and follow you (at 11 years old!!) tells me he’s going to be an out of control yob who’s not been parented correctly.

I hate bratty kids as much as the next person but you really can’t go around calling them fat cunts. Bloody hell OP. YABU

I can’t lie to you OP, If you called my kid a fat cunt, you wouldn’t have to worry about going to marks and Spencer’s again.

what does this mean? What would you have done? I always wonder what people mean when they like this kind of stuff.

This has made
my night, hilarious, the kid was a cunt so that’s justified but as per pp if he wasn’t actually fat you should have just called him a cunt and left it that.

Shame OP. Yes, that's was awful. Stop making excuses for yourself by saying he was unsociable. What you did was worse- you're an adult. And cowardly- you hid behind his father's absolute disbelief that a grown up would say that to a child.

Not unreasonable. Well maybe the fat part, but the kid was being a cunt. No wonder teenagers think they can behave this way without anyone doing or saying anything back.

The ‘child’ called her a fucking bitch and a cunt back.. 🤷‍♀️ it doesn’t sound like he was deeply wounded it’s sounds like an 11 year old was successful in intimidating an adult

That's atrocious behaviour, riding an electric scooter around a shop. I guess what you said just slipped out ;). I'm actually laughing that the Dad didn't believe the kid. Don't beat yourself up about it.

This.

Not your finest hour, was it? However obnoxious you found him, he’s a child. You’re an adult.

Good for you. He sounds like a real little shit so he deserved it. I wouldn’t feel guilty a bit. Don’t shop there for a bit. He might target someone else and be banned. Horrid child.

I can guarantee you it does not. In what possible world is it ok for any adult to body shame a child?

Plus op has no idea of this kids circumstances, for all she knows that could have been a foster parent or care worker trying to manage the situation with a kid carrying a load of trauma. But jeez isn't it easier to just label him a shit so we don't need to stretch and practice empathy? Or model positive behaviours.

You used a word you hate and never use and spoke to a child in a way you're deeply ashamed of, so basically you lost control of yourself. I think you need to reflect on why your mood was so bad that the child triggered a loss of control. Because you need to make sure it was a one off never to be repeated incident, so need to either address the cause of your stress or find a way to manage it.

I think you lost your temper. Unfortunately it means you lost a bit of the case against his antisocial behaviour. He was very badly behaved and intimidating and it’s so sad his dad could t control him. You snapped but it won’t have helped him to learn you can’t talk to people like that. So understandable but wrong.