Would this piss you off? DP comment on day out

[JadeJ91]

Day out yesterday, historical seaside town with various lovely view points. DP a bit grumpy all day and not paying a lot of interest to anything. Anyway, at one particular location I asked him what he thought of the view and he said ‘not great really….hang on, it’s just got a lot better now’ just as an attractive woman walked past, and he joked about her bum being the highlight of his day so far.

A bit disrespectful, surely? I told him to shut up and he said I should lighten up and ‘have a laugh’

No dear, we knit by the guillotine, which is where people get their heads chopped off. You are thinking of a gallows. Millenia of women having to deal with arsehole men have needed to have a certain amount of gallows humour to get through the day.

How old is he?
Sounds like he wanted to ruin the day .

Or they don’t start out this way, but by the time the level of dichkheadedness is revealed, it’s too late

“ding fucking dong” 😂😂😂

How old are you, 70s? I don't know any young couples that go for a day out for the views. Did you have lunch, do anything fun?

He was bored, he made a joke. Many on here clearly are as offended as you op so up to you but if otherwise happy and compatible it wouldn't be a LTB for me.

You don’t know any young couples that would go out for a day like the OP and her partner did? How strange!
Unless @JadeJ91forced her partner there with a gun to his head, I’m sure he’s more than capable of using his words if he didn’t fancy the destination, instead of being a miserable, derogatory twat.

'You don’t know any young couples that would go out for a day like the OP and her partner did? How strange!'

I said for the views. There's usually some element of fun involved. He was bored, unclench.

If he is otherwise a nice guy op just let it go.

Some people find looking at views fun! If he didn’t want to go he could have just said so.
I assume they did eat at some point, most people do, the OP just probably didn’t think it worth mentioning as eating lunch is a fairly standard thing to do.

I think if you’re struggling to work out why this is bad, reverse the sexes and imagine if you would ever do this.
so you’re walking along with your husband, you’re at a venue he organised but you’ve been grumpy all day ‘wow, look at the cock on that Ben. Best thing I’ve seen all day.’

Yes, we had a lunch and also had a drink planned in a nice bar which didn’t happen in the end as we went home earlier than planned.

This would give me the absolute ick.
I dont want to be with a 15 yr old.

OP why are you with a lazy, whiny, disrespectful loser like this?

Looking at another woman's body was the highlight of his day? That would upset me.

1. Because he's looking at other women right in front of my face. And 2. Because why isn't my body the highlight of his day?

He was being disrespectful of the random woman, you, and the relationship you've built together.

'I think if you’re struggling to work out why this is bad, reverse the sexes and imagine if you would ever do this.'

Context is everything. What is their relationship usually like, do they joke do they make silly comments. If, for example, I was bored at a football match and a handsome man appeared in front of me I may well have said oh the view has improved. It's a joke, do lighten up.

There haven’t been any issues up until the last month or so.

What else has he been doing over the last month or so OP? Think it might be time to wave him goodbye.

I know I'll get slated for this but

DP a bit grumpy all day and not paying a lot of interest to anything. Anyway, at one particular location I asked him what he thought of the view

If he was grumpy all day and not paying a lot of interest to anything, not sure why you asked what he thought of the view?! Sounds like you were deliberately trying to wind him up, and you succeeded. I think you got what you were asking for. If you were in a mood and weren't particularly interested in something I'm sure you wouldn't like having to feign interest and have a discussion about it. You should have just left him alone.

Men’s shitty behaviour is always the woman’s fault, of course.

Just lazier around the house (he moved in with me and was fine initially), I have to ask him to do simple things. Some of its typical man stuff e.g toilet habits but I can’t excuse him not tidying mess up in the kitchen etc.

Ah yes, my bad!

What an absolute man child.

Where is the adult conversation and communication.

Don’t get me wrong I can wake up sometimes in a bad mood for seemingly no reason but I will explain that to my DH and make it very clear that he’s done nothing wrong and I’m sorry in advance if I’m a bit quiet/not myself.

He’s got his feet under the table so he doesn’t need to make an effort any more.

Sounds like it.

I don't think it's your bad at all, @JadeJ91 . Sounds like you were doing that typical thing women do when faced with a grumpy partner, and tried to create a bit of light in the situation. I don't see this as you trying to wind him up at all. Sorry your partner was/is such a dick. As you say, you have to decide what to do going forward....

Gets worse. He’s got his feet under the table and now the facade has disappeared. Not only moody and leery but a lazy slob as well. Honestly OP are you getting the picture of what life will be like with him for the next 20 years? Lazy git at home, moody when out and you have to endure his “banter” and get told to lighten up when you call him out? Think really hard about whether you want this.

There is no such thing as "otherwise a nice guy" unless you believe women should continue to put up with misogynistic cocklodgers.